Living with anxiety can leave your loved one feeling isolated or misunderstood. While words of encouragement may help ease the anxiety, you may find yourself saying something that could have the opposite effect.

Here are a few things those suffering with anxiety would rather not hear you say:

1. ‘Just relax’

Many people with anxiety will tell you just how often they hear these words from their friends or family members.

While it may be your attempt at getting your loved one to feel less anxious, telling them to relax implies that they are choosing to feel anxious. 

2. ‘It’s all in your head’

While there is truth in the statement, saying these words to a person suffering with anxiety disorder may prevent them from opening up further out of fear of being perceived as irrational.

People living with anxiety are prone to catastrophising, i.e. making a mountain out of a molehill, but rather than telling them about a pattern of thinking they cannot control in that moment, empathise and listen to whatever it is that is triggering their anxiety. 

3. ‘Other people are worse off’

This may be one of the worst things to say to a person living with anxiety or any other mental illness.

While many people say this in an effort to give a person struggling with a problem perspective, it often leaves a person struggling with anxiety feeling guilty for being unable to cope and ashamed of having a mental disorder.

4. ‘You just need a drink’

Yes, a glass of wine now and then may help alleviate stress levels, but suggesting alcohol as a crutch to relieve anxiety may encourage the use of substances to self-medicate. 

Rather than suggesting the use of substances to ease their anxiety, suggest going for a walk, playing sport or engaging in creative activities such as writing or drawing.

5. ‘Just get some medication’

Medication may seem like a quick fix, but it is better to ask your loved one if they have considered any of the various treatments available for their anxiety.

Different forms of treatment such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), behavioural therapy and different medications are some of the options available for those struggling with anxiety disorder.

6. ‘But you look okay to me’

Whether it is anxiety disorder, depression or schizophrenia, mental illness has no physical manifestations. 

Saying this might make a person with anxiety feel as though they are being accused of making things up.

7. ‘Stop being lazy’

Anxiety disorder may lead to lack of sleep, which can leave sufferers feeling constantly tired.

Excessive worrying can also lead a person with anxiety to feel overwhelmed by an activity others have no problem with.

Rather than being critical, offer to help them with their tasks or help them break down their responsibilities into smaller, manageable segments.

8. ‘Don’t be such a Debbie Downer’

This is yet another insensitive comment people with anxiety often hear.

Few people are aware that although anxiety is not a mood disorder like depression is, it can affect the emotional state of a person struggling with it. At the core of anxiety disorder is the struggle to control negative thoughts that often lead to irritability, lack of sleep, loss of appetite, headaches, nausea and persistent tension – all of which can dampen an individual’s mood. 

If a friend or family member with chronic anxiety is feeling low, be the listening ear they need or simply be empathetic.

9. ‘I’m also stressed’

This usually precedes the “other people are worse off” comment. 

While your stress is valid, be aware than those struggling with chronic anxiety are not experiencing “just a moment of distress”. What may be just a momentary experience for you is something they struggle with on a constant basis. 

So, while you may be trying to demonstrate to your loved one that what they are experiencing is not unique, bear in mind that chronic anxiety is much harder to manage than plain stress.

Nyakallo Moleko

When we’re allergic to something, our immune system mistakenly believes that the substance is harmful to us and launches an attack.

According to Allergy Foundation South Africa (AFSA), a third of South Africans will suffer from some allergic disease during their life. 40% of allergy sufferers are children.

The most common conditions are eczema, asthma, hay fever, urticaria, food allergy and anaphylaxis.

Location, location, location

Allergies may cause relatively mild symptoms like a runny or congested nose, hives or digestive issues, but should be taken seriously as in extreme cases an allergic reaction can cause anaphylactic shock and even death.

Allergies are the bane of many people’s lives, but there certainly are places on earth that are kinder to allergy sufferers than others. 

Basically, you can be allergic to things you eat, touch and breathe in:

Food allergies

Moving to a different location may improve respiratory and and skin allergies, but is unlikely to affect food allergies. Avoiding foods that trigger your allergies has everything to do with being vigilant and not so much with your environment.

Skin allergies 

Allergic contact dermatitis is the term for what occurs when allergens come into contact with your skin. Examples of substances that may cause skin allergies are: plants like poison ivy, perfumes, hair dyes, skin creams, latex and nickel in jewellery. 

Respiratory allergies

Pollen in the air is a major cause of respiratory allergic diseases like hay fever, and factors like urbanisation, high vehicle carbon emissions and other pollutants are regarded as a strong contributing factor, especially in industrialised areas.

Four places that may bring allergy relief

1. The coast

Living in a coastal region can do wonders for respiratory and skin allergies.

Easier breathing

• If you’re prone to hay fever and live near the ocean, you will almost certainly find relief as the ocean breezes tend to blow allergens away.
• Recent studies on the effect of non-drug interventions on hay fever and dust-mite allergies indicate that salt water can help control hay fever by washing away pollen grains that cause nasal allergies resulting in hay fever and chronic rhinitis.
• Salt water can aid and restore the normal clearance of mucus, which is very important for the normal functioning of the nose.
• People who live by and swim in the sea tend to have healthier respiratory systems because seawater mimics the body’s own fluids in the lining of the airways, and doesn’t irritate them.
• Taking an ocean cruise will certainly guarantee that you leave the pollen behind.

Skin relief

• Because of its concentrated levels of minerals, water from the Dead Sea in Israel is reported to have strong healing powers and many people from all over the world go there to seek relief from skin problems. The effects are most likely related to high levels of magnesium. 
• Vitamin D deficiency (VDD) affects almost half the world’s population and a 2012 study suggests that we may need more vitamin D than currently recommended. While taking all the necessary safety precautions, exposing your skin to the sun by the seaside helps you get your requirement of vitamin D. Vitamin D from the sun helps build strong bones, increases endorphins and improves your immunity, which is likely to help with allergies.
• Apart from swimming in the sea or immersing the affected parts of the body in seawater, sea salt may be used topically. Some people find that mixing a fairly strong solution of about 1 teaspoon of sea salt per 500ml of water, then soaking the affected skin for about 10 minutes in the solution extremely effective.

The following areas may however only be able to bring relief to people with respiratory allergies:

2. Deserts of the world

If you can take the heat, desert destinations offer relief from respiratory allergies like hay fever. 

The main reason for this advantage is the fact that deserts are barren wastelands that don’t contain many plants – the source of those offending pollens. 

3. Snowy slopes

Snow-covered slopes can also bring great respite from respiratory allergies – once again because of an almost total lack of pollen.

4. Cities

If plants are your downfall, how about giving an urban jungle a try?

Because of a lower pollen count among all those skyscrapers, your allergies may be significantly lower, but that doesn’t mean the wind won’t blow in any number of other irritants – so be warned.

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Eugene Lotter

You’ve probably had a fungal infection at some point in your life. But how do you know when to see a doctor about one?

The simple rule to follow is if it spreads, gets worse or is recurrs, see your doctor. 

1. Athlete’s foot

Athlete’s foot is a common fungal infection of the feet. It is also called tinea pedis or ringworm of the foot, and usually affects the spaces between the toes. 
Diagnosis: Athlete’s foot is fairly easy to diagnose – a doctor can confirm it just by looking at your feet. However, your doctor may take a scraping and send it off to be tested.
Prognosis: It can take few weeks to a month before Athlete’s foot responds to treatment. It can also return quite easily if you re-expose your feet to the fungi – wear flip flops in public bathrooms and pools, and keep your feet dry.  
When to see the doctor: Athlete’s foot should clear up within a few weeks of using an antifungal ointment, cream or powder. However, if this doesn’t help, see your doctor. If it starts to spread or you have diabetes, see your doctor immediately. 

2. Ringworm

Ringworm appears as an itchy ring-shaped, scaly red or silver rash that can appear anywhere on your body. It is highly contagious and can spread when sharing clothing and towels or brushes, combs and headgear. 
Diagnosis: A doctor can diagnose ringworm based on a medical history and examination of the infected area. Sometimes, further testing on a sample of the infected skin or hair is needed to confirm the diagnosis. 
Prognosis: Ringworm is treated with antifungal medication. You need to continue this treatment for a number of weeks (even if it appears to have cleared up) and take care not to become re-infected.  
When to see the doctor: If ringworm doesn’t clear up after two weeks following treatment, you should see the doctor. Other symptoms that require a doctor’s attention include discharge of pus, fever, the rash gets bigger or spreads, or there is a persistent, severe or recurring infection. 

3. Vaginal Candidiasis (thrush)

Thrush can affect different parts of your body but a vaginal yeast infection is quite common. Normally, candida lives in the body without you noticing it – however, when conditions change, it can multiply out of control, causing an uncomfortable infection. 
Diagnosis: Your doctor can make a diagnosis following a physical examination and taking your medical history. If your doctor suspects there is an underlying medication that increases your risk for thrush (diabetes, cancer or HIV), you may need to go for blood tests.  
Prognosis: You need to stop the growth of the organism that is causing the infection to treat candidiasis. An antifungal topical ointment that is applied directly into the vagina can often cure a yeast infection. 
When to see the doctor: If the infection does not respond to treatment or recurs within a two-month period, you suffer from a chronic illness or weakened immune system, you’re taking medication to suppress your immune system, or you are pregnant, you should see your doctor. 

4. Jock itch

This itchy rash in the groin area (usually in the crease between the scrotum and thighs) looks red but has a defined edge. Jock itch is caused by the same fungus that causes athlete’s foot and can spread often spread to other parts of your body. 
Diagnosis: Your doctor can make a diagnosis of jock itch based on the description of your symptoms and your skin’s appearance. 
Prognosis: Fortunately jock itch is easy to treat and highly curable. 
When to see the doctor: If after treating the infection for longer than two weeks with topical treatment and it has not cleared up, you should see your doctor. If you notice that the rash is worsening even with treatment or you are in pain, notice pus or have a fever, don’t put off seeing your doctor – it needs to be assessed by a medical professional.

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Compiled by Mandy Freeman