Madonna Says She Experienced Suicidal Feelings During Custody Battle Over Son Rocco

Madonna has shared that she contemplated taking her own life after becoming embroiled in a public custody battle over her then-teenage son.

Almost a decade ago, the Grammy-winning musician found herself at the centre of a legal spat with her ex-husband Guy Ritchie, after their eldest son Rocco, who was 15 at the time, said he wanted to live with his dad in the UK rather than joining his mum at their family home in the States.

The Like A Prayer singer was on a world tour during the early stages of this custody battle, at one point breaking down in tears as she talked about Rocco during a one-off stand-alone show in Australia.

During a wide-ranging new interview on the podcast On Purpose With Jay Shetty, which mostly centred around spirituality, Madonna opened up about this low ebb in her personal life.

I actually contemplated suicide,” she recalled. “One of the most painful moments in my life where I honestly couldn’t see the forest through the trees was when I went through a custody battle with my son.

Even though my marriage didn’t work out – I mean, a lot of people’s marriages don’t work out, they marry the wrong people, they’re not aligned, they’re not meant for each other.

“[But] someone trying to take my child away from me was like, they might as well just kill me. That’s really how I was thinking.”

Rocco Ritchie in January 2025
Rocco Ritchie in January 2025

Cinzia Camela/LiveMedia/Shutterstock

Madonna went on to disclose that she would often find herself “lying on the floor of my dressing room sobbing” during this period.

“I had to go on stage every night,” she said. “I really thought it was like it was the end of the world. I couldn’t take it. I just couldn’t take it.”

The chart-topping star is a mum to six children in total: 28-year-old Lourdes, 25-year-old Rocco, 20-year-old David, 19-year-old Mercy and 13-year-old twins Estere and Stella.

Rocco Ritchie and Madonna at New York Fashion Week in 2022
Rocco Ritchie and Madonna at New York Fashion Week in 2022

Dimitrios Kambouris via Getty Images for NYFW: The Shows

Fortunately, Madonna and Rocco have now put their past differences aside, and are now “great friends”, she told Jay Shetty, and last month he joined his siblings for his famous mum’s birthday celebrations in Italy.

Weeks earlier, she also made a public statement in solidarity with the children of Gaza on her eldest son’s birthday, which she described as the “best gift I can give to him as a mother”.

Help and support:

  • Mind, open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393.
  • Samaritans offers a listening service which is open 24 hours a day, on 116 123 (UK and ROI – this number is FREE to call and will not appear on your phone bill).
  • CALM (the Campaign Against Living Miserably) offer a helpline open 5pm-midnight, 365 days a year, on 0800 58 58 58, and a webchat service.
  • The Mix is a free support service for people under 25. Call 0808 808 4994 or email help@themix.org.uk
  • Rethink Mental Illness offers practical help through its advice line which can be reached on 0808 801 0525 (Monday to Friday 10am-4pm). More info can be found on rethink.org.
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8 Guy Ritchie Movies To Check Out If You Loved The Gentlemen On Netflix

If you’re done with Guy Ritchie’s hit Netflix series The Gentlemen, you might be curious to browse through some more of the British director’s back catalogue.

Known for his brutal gangster films with swaggering protagonists, violent action sequences and rapid dialogue, his signature style can be found all throughout his filmography.

Thankfully for fans of the new eight-part series – which itself takes place in the same universe as his 2019 film of the same name – there’s plenty more where that came from.

Check out some more of the director’s films below:

Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels

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This 1998 comedy crime drama is a Guy Ritchie classic. Starring Jason Statham, Nick Moran, Jason Flemyng and Dexter Fletcher, the plot follows the streetwise Eddy who convinces his three friends to pool their money for a poker game against a local mobster.

When he loses, he’s given just a week to come up with half a million pounds.

Snatch

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