Next Time You Make A Negative Comment About Your Kid, Remember The 3-1 Ratio

Having good self-esteem is so important for our mental health – and with social media being exceptionally popular now, it can feel harder than ever to keep our kids feeling confident about themselves and their bodies.

Self-esteem is how a person feels about themselves. According to the charity Young Minds, most children will have dips in self-esteem as they go through different stages or challenges in life, such as bullying or sitting exams.

And as parents, it can be tough to know what to do to help them through these dips in how they feel about, and view, themselves.

Signs of low self-esteem in children

According to the mental health charity, children and young people with low self-esteem might regularly:

  • have a negative image of themselves
  • lack confidence
  • find it hard to make and keep friendships
  • feel lonely and isolated
  • tend to avoid new things and find change hard
  • can’t deal well with failure
  • tend to put themselves down
  • are not proud of what they achieve
  • always think they could have done better
  • are constantly comparing themselves to their peers in a negative way.

Thankfully there are some relatively easy ways we, as parents, can help boost our children’s self-esteem.

Apply the 3-1 ratio to everyday life

It’s pretty hard to never utter a negative comment to your child (especially when you’ve reached the end of your tether and they’ve been pushing your buttons all day).

According to Big Life Journal, a popular Instagram account offering parenting advice, for every negative comment you make about your child, you should then balance it out with three positive ones.

So, for example, if your child spilled a drink everywhere and you reacted with: “I can’t believe you did that. Why can’t you just hold your cup?”

The experts behind the account advise following up with at least three positive comments to your child that day. So things like: “I noticed you shared with your brother, thank you” or “thank you for putting your jumper away”.

“Scientists discovered that it takes three positive experiences to offset one negative experience,” they wrote in an Instagram post.

“Your child’s brain is wired to remember and focus on negative comments. So, to build your child’s self-esteem, apply this 3-1 ratio.”

Other ways to boost self-esteem, according to Young Minds, include:

  • Let them know you value effort rather than perfection
  • Encourage them to try new challenges
  • Encourage them to voice their opinions and ideas
  • Ask them about three good things that went well during their day
  • Acknowledge how they feel and help them to express this in words
  • Spend quality time together doing things they enjoy.
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If Your Baby Or Toddler Naps Little And Often, Researchers Want You To Do This

When it comes to babies and toddlers, it’s safe to say there’s no rulebook as far as sleep is concerned.

While there’s no shortage of books out there telling parents how much their children should be sleeping at various stages in their development, the reality is that no two babies are the same so they’ll have very different sleep needs.

And, when they reach toddlerhood, well… good luck to you as you spend hours each evening trying to get them down to sleep. (Sorry, I might be projecting.)

But does it actually mean something when an infant naps little and often?

Well, a new study suggests it might. Some children are more efficient at consolidating information during sleep, so they nap less frequently, the research found.

Conversely, University of East Anglia researchers found that it’s usually the case that frequent cat-nappers tend to have fewer words and poorer cognitive skills than their peers.

The takeaway? The research team said these children should be allowed to nap as frequently and for as long as they need.

For the study, researchers analysed 463 infants aged between eight months and three years during lockdown in 2020.

Parents were surveyed about their children’s sleep patterns, their ability to focus on a task, keep information in their memory, and the number of words that they understood and could say.

They also asked parents about their socio-economic status – including their postcode, income, and education – and about the amount of screen time and outdoors activities their child engaged in.

As the research took place during lockdown, it allowed researchers to study children’s intrinsic sleep needs because they weren’t at daycare, which is where they tend to sleep less.

They found the structure of daytime sleep is an indicator of cognitive development.

Lead researcher Dr Teodora Gliga said: “There is a lot of parental anxiety around sleep. Parents worry that their kids don’t nap as much as expected for their age – or nap too frequently and for too long.

“But our research shows that how frequently a child naps reflects their individual cognitive need. Some are more efficient at consolidating information during sleep, so they nap less frequently.

“Children with smaller vocabularies or a lower score in a measure of executive function, nap more frequently.

“Young children will naturally nap for as long as they need and they should be allowed to do just that.”

Parents of frequent cat-nappers needn’t worry though.

The findings suggest that “children have different sleep needs – some children may drop naps earlier because they don’t need them anymore,” said Dr Gliga, and that “others may still need to nap past three years of age” – and that’s OK.

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‘Time-traveling’ pathogens in melting permafrost pose likely risk to environment

Ancient pathogens that escape from melting permafrost have real potential to damage microbial communities and might potentially threaten human health, according to a new study by Giovanni Strona of the European Commission Joint Research Centre and colleagues, published July 27 in the open-access journal PLOS Computational Biology.

The idea that “time-traveling” pathogens trapped in ice or hidden in remote laboratory facilities could break free to cause catastrophic outbreaks has inspired generations of novelists and screenwriters. While melting glaciers and permafrost are giving many types of dormant microbes the opportunity to re-emerge, the potential threats to human health and the environment posed by these microbes have been difficult to estimate.

In a new study, Strona’s team quantified the ecological risks posed by these microbes using computer simulations. The researchers performed artificial evolution experiments where digital virus-like pathogens from the past invade communities of bacteria-like hosts. They compared the effects of invading pathogens on the diversity of host bacteria to diversity in control communities where no invasion occurred.

The team found that in their simulations, the ancient invading pathogens could often survive and evolve in the modern community, and about 3 percent became dominant. While most of the dominant invaders had little effect on the composition of the larger community, about 1 percent of the invaders yielded unpredictable results. Some caused up to one third of the host species to die out, while others increased diversity by up to 12 percent compared to the control simulations.

The risks posed by this 1 percent of released pathogens may seem small, but given the sheer number of ancient microbes regularly released into modern communities, outbreak events still represent a substantial hazard. The new findings suggest that the risks posed by time-traveling pathogens — so far confined to science fiction stories — could in fact be powerful drivers of ecological change and threats to human health.

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Are People Getting Botox Too Early? Here’s What Dermatologists Say.

To many, Botox is a controversial topic. Plenty of questions surround the potential use of the injections: How much Botox is too much Botox? Who are the best doctors? Should a physician assistant be allowed to administer the injections? Are other products preferable?

Perhaps most common, though, are queries about the best age to start the injections, if you’re interested. Some believe that, once one’s skin starts sagging, it’s already too late for Botox to properly work. Others assume that “preventative Botox” is a myth.

To get the facts, we reached out to board-certified dermatologists and plastic surgeons, asking when is the ideal age to start getting Botox, especially when trying to maximize results.

What is Botox?

Short for botulinum neurotoxin, Botox injections use a toxin to limit muscle movement for a limited time. By preventing targeted muscles from moving and completely relaxing them, the substance basically smooths out wrinkles when applied to the face.

Interestingly enough, the first use of Botox was unrelated to cosmetic matters.

“Botox was actually isolated almost 100 years ago and it was originally used to treat spasms around the eyes,” explained Beverly Hills plastic surgeon Dr. Gary Motykie. “Doctors were using it to treat people medically and they started noticing that the patients were looking younger, so at one point companies started looking into other benefits of the injections. Nowadays, people don’t realize that Botox is used for many disorders like spasms, migraines, muscle disorders, vocal cord issues, bladder problems and more. It has a lot of medical uses other than cosmetic ones.”

It is cosmetic uses, though, that have propelled Botox into the popular cultural canon, making it “one of the most common nonsurgical cosmetic procedures” in the world, according to the University of California San Francisco, with an estimated 11 million people having used it at least once.

In the noninvasive surgical world, the most popular targeted area is, according to experts, the face.

“Between the eyes is the most common place to get Botox,” said New York dermatologist Dr. Leah Ansell. “It opens up your eyes. The second most common place is the forehead for wrinkles. Then there are other ‘special areas’ that people treat, like where your nose scrunches by the eyes above your lip and the angles of the jaw.”

No matter the target, the goal of the procedure is to smooth out skin creases, and not necessarily to prevent them from appearing in the first place.

When should someone start getting Botox?

“There is not one age to start Botox,” Ansell said. “It varies on the individual. Specifically, when you start to see lines that are etched at rest — meaning they are there even when you are not raising your forehead or smiling, but just staring right ahead — it means it’s time to consider starting light Botox.”

Motykie has a similar view. “The ideal age to start Botox is when you are starting to show signs of aging,” he said. “That is usually in your late 30s and early 40s.”

Genetics can also play a factor.

Botox is a brand name that's typically used to refer to botulinum toxin in general, although it is in fact one of many brand names. Others include Dysport and Xeomin.

Anna Efetova via Getty Images

Botox is a brand name that’s typically used to refer to botulinum toxin in general, although it is in fact one of many brand names. Others include Dysport and Xeomin.

“I tell patients to look at their relatives,” Ansell said. “If those adults in their 50s, 60s and 70s have a lot of sun damage or a lot of wrinkles, that may happen to you as well. There are a lot of genetics at play here, so knowing what your skin type is can help.”

Speaking of sun damage, the doctors we contacted all were adamant about the importance of sun protection, both for health reasons and in order to stave off wrinkles — and therefore the use of Botox.

“The most important thing you could tell someone with respect to wrinkling and aging is to avoid the sun,” said Miami-based plastic surgeon Dr. Carlos Wolf. “Wear sunscreen, use antioxidants and hyaluronic acid to moisturize the skin. You have to be careful as the sun is what makes you look older.”

How bad is it to get Botox injections before the suggested guidelines?

“We’re seeing a trend as potential Botox patients are becoming younger and younger, and I’m not a huge fan of that,” Motykie said. “Traditionally, the majority of those interested were in their 40s and 50s as they were starting to show signs of aging, but now it’s becoming more mainstream” at younger ages.

Plenty of factors contribute to the trend, especially our reliance on social media and all things visual. We place so much importance on pictures and the look of things that it’s only natural to turn the lens toward ourselves. We are the subjects of our own selfies, after all.

Also, given the popularity of the injections, folks seem to have become at ease with the idea of getting Botox. People think everyone is signing up for the procedure, so why shouldn’t they try it?

As medical professionals noted, though, getting Botox in your early 20s when it’s rare to have wrinkles might not be the wisest idea.

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It's great for acne-prone and sensitive skin.","source":"","title":"Elta MD UV Clear broad spectrum (SPF 46)","type":"image","summary":"","badge":"","cta":[{"text":"$41 at Dermstore","url":"https://www.awin1.com/cread.php?awinmid=29069&awinaffid=837483&campaign=&clickref=64bab497e4b0dcb4cab90254&ued=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.dermstore.com%2Feltamd-uv-clear-broad-spectrum-spf46%2F11370303.html&platform=pl","ampPositionInUnit":23,"positionInSubUnit":25}],"meta":null,"credit":"Dermstore","creditUrl":"","authorship":{"author":{"id":"000000000000000000000000","bio":{},"urls":{},"urlName":{"text":"","transliterated":""}}},"thumbnail":{"url":{"fileName":"645a847a2200003500eea1bf.png","type":"hectorUrl"},"caption":"According to Camp, this sunscreen is technically a mineral and chemical sunscreen because it is formulated with both zinc and octinoxate. It also has skin care-friendly ingredients like hyaluronic acid, niacinamide and vitamin E. 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They work together to shield the skin from sun damage and to hydrate, soften and smooth the skin and protect against further damage from free radicals. ","source":"","title":"Summer Fridays ShadeDrops mineral milk sunscreen (SPF 30)","type":"image","summary":"","badge":"","cta":[{"text":"$36 at Sephora","url":"https://click.linksynergy.com/deeplink?id=Zb4jl9GtVeY&mid=2417&u1=64bab497e4b0dcb4cab90254&murl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.sephora.com%2Fproduct%2Fshadedrops-broad-spectrum-spf-30-mineral-milk-sunscreen-P500181","ampPositionInUnit":21,"positionInSubUnit":23}],"meta":null,"credit":"Sephora","creditUrl":"","authorship":{"author":{"id":"000000000000000000000000","bio":{},"urls":{},"urlName":{"text":"","transliterated":""}}},"thumbnail":{"url":{"fileName":"645a84942200001a00eea1c3.png","type":"hectorUrl"},"caption":"Both Pamela Anderson and Hailey Bieber are fans of&nbsp;Summer Fridays&rsquo; ShadeDrops SPF 30 mineral sunscreen, a great option for anyone looking for a lightweight, naturally radiant finish that protects from UV rays while also providing nourishing ingredients to the&nbsp;skin. Made with vegan and cruelty-free ingredients, this&nbsp;sunscreen&nbsp;is formulated with zinc oxide, squalane, chamomile and an antioxidant blend of vitamin E and ethyl ferulate. They work together to shield the skin from sun damage and to hydrate, soften and smooth the skin and protect against further damage from free radicals.&nbsp;","credit":"Sephora","height":1080,"width":1080,"ops":""},"textWrap":"wrapped","imagePositionInUnit":20,"imagePositionInSubUnit":20,"authors":[],"isLiveblogSlide":false},"provider":null},{"embedData":{"type":"hector","url":"https://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset/645a849a2200004100490a12.png","queryParams":{},"width":1080,"height":1080,"credit":"Sephora"},"type":"image","common":{"id":"645a84e2e4b094269bb01dac","caption":"\"This is a 100% mineral sunscreen product that offers SPF 30 protection,\" Camp said. \"The labeling also includes information about protection from UVA radiation, PA (protection grade of UVA), which many sunscreens do not report.\" It also shields the skin from blue light. It’s completely sheer so you don’t have to worry about a white cast and has a lightweight finish that won’t weigh your skin down.","source":"","title":"Supergoop Mineral Sheer screen (SPF 30)","type":"image","summary":"","badge":"","cta":[{"text":"$38 at Sephora","url":"https://click.linksynergy.com/deeplink?id=Zb4jl9GtVeY&mid=2417&u1=64bab497e4b0dcb4cab90254&murl=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.sephora.com%2Fproduct%2Fsupergoop-mineral-sheerscreen-spf-30-pa-P470057","ampPositionInUnit":19,"positionInSubUnit":19}],"meta":null,"credit":"Sephora","creditUrl":"","authorship":{"author":{"id":"000000000000000000000000","bio":{},"urls":{},"urlName":{"text":"","transliterated":""}}},"thumbnail":{"url":{"fileName":"645a849a2200004100490a12.png","type":"hectorUrl"},"caption":"\"This&nbsp;is a 100% mineral sunscreen product that offers SPF 30 protection,\" Camp said. \"The labeling also includes information about protection from UVA radiation, PA (protection grade of UVA), which many sunscreens do not report.\" It also shields the skin from blue light. It’s completely sheer so you don’t have to worry about a white cast and has a lightweight finish that won’t weigh your skin down.","credit":"Sephora","height":1080,"width":1080,"ops":""},"textWrap":"wrapped","imagePositionInUnit":18,"imagePositionInSubUnit":18,"authors":[],"isLiveblogSlide":false},"provider":null},{"embedData":{"type":"hector","url":"https://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset/645a84762500001a009db51c.png","queryParams":{},"width":1080,"height":1080,"credit":"Violet Grey"},"type":"image","common":{"id":"645a84c0e4b005be8fef755f","caption":"A personal favorite, this Dr. Loretta sunscreen is ideal for anyone who wants a mineral sunscreen but with a lightweight, silky smooth finish you typically only get from chemical SPFs. Zinc, antioxidants and botanical extracts provide protection from sun damage while also helping to improve the look of fine lines, dark spots and other signs of aging, leaving skin soft, smooth and nourished. I’ve found that it layers beautifully with other skin care products as well as makeup, doesn’t pill and gives skin the perfect amount of glow without feeling oily.","source":"","title":"Dr. Loretta Universal Glow sunscreen (SPF 40)","type":"image","summary":"","badge":"","cta":[{"text":"$60 at Violet Grey","url":"https://www.pntrs.com/t/8-12487-265720-217568?sid=64bab497e4b0dcb4cab90254&website=373869&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.violetgrey.com%2Fen-us%2Fshopping%2Funiversal-glow-daily-defense-spf-40-19887086","ampPositionInUnit":17,"positionInSubUnit":17}],"meta":null,"credit":"Violet Grey","creditUrl":"","authorship":{"author":{"id":"000000000000000000000000","bio":{},"urls":{},"urlName":{"text":"","transliterated":""}}},"thumbnail":{"url":{"fileName":"645a84762500001a009db51c.png","type":"hectorUrl"},"caption":"A personal favorite, this Dr. Loretta sunscreen is ideal for anyone who wants a mineral sunscreen but with a lightweight, silky smooth finish you typically only get from chemical SPFs. Zinc, antioxidants and botanical extracts provide protection from sun damage while also helping to improve the look of fine lines, dark spots and other signs of aging, leaving skin soft, smooth and nourished. I’ve found that it layers beautifully with other skin care products as well as makeup, doesn’t pill and gives skin the perfect amount of glow without feeling oily.","credit":"Violet Grey","height":1080,"width":1080,"ops":""},"textWrap":"wrapped","imagePositionInUnit":16,"imagePositionInSubUnit":16,"authors":[],"isLiveblogSlide":false},"provider":null},{"embedData":{"type":"hector","url":"https://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset/645a848725000075009db520.png","queryParams":{},"width":1080,"height":1080,"credit":"Target"},"type":"image","common":{"id":"645a84d6e4b0c10612e7965d","caption":"\"This lightweight, non-greasy product provides SPF 50 protection and contains zinc oxide as the active ingredient,\" Camp said. 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It’s perfect for someone who prefers a silky matte finish.","credit":"Sephora","height":1080,"width":1080,"ops":""},"textWrap":"wrapped","imagePositionInUnit":12,"imagePositionInSubUnit":12,"authors":[],"isLiveblogSlide":false},"provider":null},{"embedData":{"type":"hector","url":"https://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset/645a84732500001e009db51a.png","queryParams":{},"width":1080,"height":1080,"credit":"Amazon"},"type":"image","common":{"id":"645a850ae4b018d846b9b691","caption":"Camp recommended this CeraVe classic, saying that \"This facial SPF sunscreen contains zinc and titanium to protect skin from the sun, as well as ceramides to preserve the health of the skin barrier.\" It’s a great combination of both skin care and sun protection.","source":"","title":"CeraVe hydrating mineral sunscreen (SPF 50)","type":"image","summary":"","badge":"","cta":[{"text":"$13.55 at Amazon","url":"https://www.amazon.com/Mineral-Sunscreen-Titanium-Dioxide-Sensitive/dp/B07KLY4RYG?tag=thehuffingtop-20&ascsubtag=64bab497e4b0dcb4cab90254%2C-1%2C-1%2Cd%2C0%2C0%2Chp-fil-am%3D0%2C0%3A0%2C0%2C0%2C0","ampPositionInUnit":11,"positionInSubUnit":11,"isAmazonLink":true}],"meta":null,"credit":"Amazon","creditUrl":"","authorship":{"author":{"id":"000000000000000000000000","bio":{},"urls":{},"urlName":{"text":"","transliterated":""}}},"thumbnail":{"url":{"fileName":"645a84732500001e009db51a.png","type":"hectorUrl"},"caption":"Camp recommended this CeraVe classic, saying that \"This facial SPF sunscreen contains zinc and titanium to protect skin from the sun, as well as ceramides to preserve the health of the skin barrier.\" It’s a great combination of both skin care and sun protection.","credit":"Amazon","height":1080,"width":1080,"ops":""},"textWrap":"wrapped","imagePositionInUnit":10,"imagePositionInSubUnit":10,"authors":[],"isLiveblogSlide":false},"provider":null},{"embedData":{"type":"hector","url":"https://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset/645a84a12200001900eea1c5.png","queryParams":{},"width":1080,"height":1080,"credit":"Sephora"},"type":"image","common":{"id":"645a84e6e4b005be8fef7594","caption":"Want to go a little fancy? 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It also contains hyaluronic acid and niacinamide to hydrate and even out skin tone and texture, and silk extracts to support the skin’s natural moisture barrier and act as a smooth primer for makeup. It leaves skin feeling silky-smooth and soft.","credit":"Sephora","height":1080,"width":1080,"ops":""},"textWrap":"wrapped","imagePositionInUnit":8,"imagePositionInSubUnit":8,"authors":[],"isLiveblogSlide":false},"provider":null},{"embedData":{"type":"hector","url":"https://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset/645a848b2500001b009db522.png","queryParams":{},"width":1080,"height":1080,"credit":"Dermstore"},"type":"image","common":{"id":"645a84d9e4b03e16f19efeb7","caption":"You can’t go wrong with SkinCeuticals products — they’re all about skin health and radiance. This tinted mineral sunscreen not only provides broad spectrum protection, but it gives skin a radiant, even glow without leaving a white cast or oily residue. 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Elta MD UV Clear broad spectrum (SPF 46)

The Best Mineral Sunscreens, According to Dermatologists

“If someone has no lines, no wrinkles, boasts a nice healthy skin, is in their mid 20s, I really don’t think it’s worth getting Botox,” Ansell said.

“If a car salesman tells you that you should buy a new car in case your current one breaks down, would you do it?” he asked.

Also, it may not be a good idea to inject your face with too much toxin, which may happen if starting early.

“I don’t think there are negative effects to starting early, but if people’s faces are too frozen because of it over time, does that change the way people interact with them socially?” Ansell asked.

Clearly, Botox is about more than smoothing wrinkles, which makes the age when you start injections that much more important.

What can you do to avoid needing Botox?

According to experts, the best way to push off the appearance of wrinkles and the potential need for Botox is proper skin care. In addition to avoiding the sun and using sunscreen, Motykie sings the praises of microneedling.

Also referred to as collagen induction therapy, the procedure basically calls for the repeated puncturing of the skin with tiny needles. According to the Cleveland Clinic, this will “help reduce the appearance of skin concerns such as acne scars, stretch marks or wrinkles.”

“As we get older, the skin is thinning, so you’re not only getting wrinkles from muscle movements but from the skin thinning,” Motykie explained. “Microneedling alone can help thicken your skin and therefore prevent those wrinkles from forming, and I think that at a younger age that would be a preferable go-to than starting with the Botox right away.”

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