The Questions Your Boomer Relatives Wish You’d Actually Ask

There have always been generational conflicts, but the chasm between baby boomers (born between 1946 and 1964) and other generations after them seems particularly hard to bridge.

Between changing values, hyper-polarised politics, and the radical shift in financial stability and opportunity, it doesn’t take a genius to see why some younger individuals find it challenging to relate to their elders.

As challenging as it may feel sometimes, there’s a simple solution for those wanting to experience more closeness with their boomer relatives and to understand them better: ask more questions.

Simple curiosity, by way of a thoughtful question, can make people feel heard and respected – and can also help change your perspective on why someone you love thinks the way they do, why they are the way they are. That dialogue may prove to be one of the most rewarding ones you undertake.

Asking more questions is a great way to start the conversations you're longing to have with your loved one.

Maskot via Getty Images

Asking more questions is a great way to start the conversations you’re longing to have with your loved one.

“In my work with families, I’ve noticed that older relatives are rarely waiting to be corrected,” Anna Marchenko, a licensed mental health counsellor and principal practitioner at Miami Hypnosis and Therapy, tells HuffPost.

“What they tend to want is to be understood in the context of the world they grew up in. These questions often slow conversations down in a way that makes real understanding possible.”

HuffPost asked family therapists to suggest some starter questions boomer relatives wish they’d get asked more – and they may appreciate having these conversations more than you could ever know.

‘What do you wish people asked you about more?’

If you’re new to opening this kind of dialogue with an older relative, the best start is often… to ask what they want to be asked. Yes, it’s a little like cheating, but this question in itself can lead the way to so much understanding on both sides.

This question “gets at what a parent may want to share more in their relationship with you,” Sarah Epstein, a marriage and family therapist who specialises in family dysfunction, told HuffPost. “Maybe they wish you asked about their health, their hobbies, their careers or their travels.”

For Epstein, this question can open the door to a new dynamic between your parent or older relative and you. “Asking shows an interest in not only having parents support you, but you to invest in them,” she said. “You can then lean into that more by asking about their current excitement and stressors.”

Remember: the point of asking questions in the first place is to allow your relative to feel heard, so open-ended and even apparently vague conversation starters work like a charm.

‘What was your family like when you were growing up?’

Imagine you were meeting a new friend for coffee. You are likely to ask questions about their upbringing. While you may already know the basics about your relative, like where they grew up and how many siblings they have, asking them about their family of origin is an amazing way to get to know them better – and even forge a new kind of relationship with them.

As well as the more general, “What was your family like?” Epstein also recommends asking more specific questions, such as, “What were your parents like?” or “Who in your extended family were you closest with and who were you not close with?”

“As their child, you only see their adult relationships, not the ones they experienced as children themselves,” Epstein said. “Asking these kinds of questions humanises parents to their children and other younger relatives, and gives parents a chance to tell their children more about themselves. It opens up possible vulnerable topics, like what felt good and what felt difficult in their upbringing and how they managed that.”

‘What did the world expect from you when you were young?’

This is an amazing question to get people to reflect on what the world’s expectations of them might have cost them – as well as any gifts they might have brought.

When asked this question, “people usually talk about pressure rather than nostalgia,” Marchenko said. “They describe growing up fast, being needed early, and making tradeoffs that were not optional. It helps younger relatives see that many values were shaped by necessity rather than preference.”

This line of questioning may also naturally lead into other similar revelations from your older relative, such as how systems of power worked in the environment they grew up in and what beliefs their upbringing created that they may have challenged later in life, says Marchenko.

You never got to know your parents or grandparents in certain ways — because you simply weren't there for it. But it's a perspective you won't want to miss out on.

FG Trade via Getty Images

You never got to know your parents or grandparents in certain ways — because you simply weren’t there for it. But it’s a perspective you won’t want to miss out on.

‘When you look at the world now, how does it feel to you?’

One of the greatest obstacles to creating mutually respectful relationships with our older relatives today is the stark difference in values and politics younger generations often have. But phrasing a question like this opens the door to curiosity rather than immediately creating defensiveness.

“This avoids debates about progress and invites reflection instead,” Marchenko said. “People speak about gains and losses at the same time, which allows disagreement without turning anyone into the problem.”

‘Is there anything you still feel responsible for passing on?’

“This reframes older generations as caretakers rather than obstacles,” Marchenko said. “The answers are usually less about advice and more about values, restraint, and hard-earned perspective.”

This is a great question because they may have previously avoided sharing their thoughts on this subject for fear of how they might be received. For you, hearing about how your relative views their potential legacy may also be eye-opening and perspective-shifting.

‘What feels good in our relationship right now? What doesn’t?’

In the same way that you may find some aspects of your relationship with your older relative difficult, they might too. If you can ask this question and receive the answer without getting defensive, the two of you might be able to work together to deepen the relationship and smooth over areas of discontent.

“When you ask straight out how the relationship feels, you can start to have open, honest discussions about how the relationship is going,” Epstein said. “It may turn out you each have things you love doing together, or discussing, that you can double down on. You may also identify things your relative has been feeling about the relationship that you can then work on together. The easiest route to clarity is gently, respectfully asking about the other person’s experience.”

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Adults Need Tummy Time, Too — Here Are The Ailments It Can Actually Help Fix

If you’re a parent, “tummy time” is probably a familiar term, considered by many to be key to the physical development of babies. But now, tummy time is trending for adults, too.

Getting out of your desk chair and spending some time on your stomach might seem awkward at first, but if you think about how long you sit in the same position much of the day — at the office, on the couch and in the car — it makes sense. Experts say it’s offsetting the effects of tech neck and tight hips, too.

According to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, the average worker spends 45% of the day sitting. In addition to sitting, they stare at electronics all day; 91% of Americans own a smartphone. Screen-based lives might be causing a variety of orthopedic problems.

Lying on your stomach for 10 or more minutes a day while watching TV or reading can improve bad posture and relieve ‘tech neck’ — the strain in our necks and shoulders caused by looking down at phones and laptops for hours each day,” said Julie Landis, a physical therapist and ergonomist in Washington, D.C.

Here’s what to know as you consider getting out of your chair and down on your belly — a position that’s no longer just for babies.

This baby perfectly demonstrates tummy time, an activity that helps build strength and mobility.

d3sign via Getty Images

This baby perfectly demonstrates tummy time, an activity that helps build strength and mobility.

What is tummy time?

Tummy time is an activity in which new babies spend time while awake on their stomachs. There, they build multiple muscle groups and improve mobility as well as arm, trunk and neck strength.

In a TikTok post from 2023 that has recently gained popularity again, physical therapist “Sammy” on her profile “unifiedptandyoga” focuses on how adult tummy time can help one age gracefully by achieving more mobility. She shows viewers a progression of lying on your stomach with multiple pillows under you, and then reducing the number, assuming pain goes away each time.

She recently made a new video, noting her old one probably gained traction due to tech neck, a term used to describe the chronic shoulder or neck pain experienced from using technology. She showed some updated techniques in the video and stated that it’s even hard for some patients in her clinic to get into that position on their stomachs — but it’s important to be able to do.

Tummy time can have an effect on tech neck.

I’ve seen a noticeable increase in patients of all ages complaining about neck stiffness, tightness or pain, which can be linked to prolonged screen time,” said Dr. Ehsan Jazini, a spine surgeon at VSI in Reston, Virginia.

“The mechanics of looking down for long periods squishes our spinal discs, which I refer to as ‘shock absorbers’ of the spine,” Jazini said. “Over time, this pressure placed on the discs can accelerate disc degeneration, pinch nerves, reduce mobility and trigger symptoms that radiate into the shoulders, arms and hands.”

He said not addressing poor posture affects your spine’s function in the long term. “That strain can lead to chronic neck pain, stiffness, instability and pain throughout the rest of the body. If left uncorrected, poor posture can lead to wear and tear on the spine that’s harder to reverse down the line.”

Tummy time can impact hip and back pain.

Adult tummy time also helps to open up the front of the hips and activate the core and back muscles, which are key players in everyday back pain.

“Many people spend far too much time sitting, whether at a desk, in a car, or on the couch. The human body was not designed for such inactivity,” said Dr. Gbolahan Okubadejo, a spinal and orthopedic surgeon at the Institute for Comprehensive Spine Care in New York and New Jersey. He fears if we don’t change these habits we will soon see “an increase in musculoskeletal issues across all age groups.” These include:

  • Degenerative disc disease, where the discs between the vertebrae begin to wear down due to constant pressure and a lack of movement. “This can lead to stiffness, pain, and even nerve compression.”
  • Sciatica, occurring when the sciatic nerve is irritated or compressed, often by a herniated disc or tight muscles in the lower back. “People may experience sharp pain that radiates down the leg, along with numbness or weakness.”
  • Tight hip flexors, leading to pelvic misalignment and lower back pain. “Over time, this can impact your gait and make everyday movements more difficult.”

Flipping onto your stomach can counteract extended sitting just as it does for infants, he said. “When you lie on your stomach, you naturally extend the spine, which helps reverse the flexed posture that sitting creates. This gentle spinal extension relieves pressure on the discs, especially in the lower back, and allows the back muscles to stretch and activate differently.”

In addition, you are able to open the hip flexors, which are often tightened and shortened from sitting too much. “By relaxing into a prone position, the hips and pelvis can realign more naturally, which supports better posture when you return to standing or sitting,” Okubadejo said. So, your tummy time actually makes you better at sitting too.

Here’s what tummy time looks like for adults.

“The adult tummy time position isn’t natural for most of us, so I recommend starting slow, and breaking adult tummy time into increments,” Jazini said. “Take three to five minutes at a time, a few times a day, lying on your stomach while propped on your elbows. You should feel a stretch in the front of the neck, as well as in your back and in your hips.”

Katie Breaker, a sales director in Denver, said she’d tried various seat cushions and stretches without much improvement in back pain. Then, her physical therapist suggested tummy time — simply lying face down for 10 minutes per day. “No devices or setup. Just a flat surface, arms by the side, and a quiet room. After about a week of doing this twice a day, I added a thin towel under my chest and held it for fifteen minutes,” she said. Two weeks later, she could feel her back decompressing and had less hip tension and more flexibility.

“I could walk longer during event setups without fatigue,” she said. So, she kept upping her time and now does two 20-minute sessions per day, especially during long workdays on a computer.

Jazini recommended pairing this practice with a screen break, too. “Take five minutes to do something away from your screen whether it’s going for a short walk, stretching, or grabbing some water.” You can work up to hourly breaks of around five to 10 minutes, setting a reminder or timer to stay on schedule.

Breaker said: “I still sit most of the day, but I do not carry the same tightness I used to. It has been the simplest thing I have added, and it has worked better than anything else I tried.”

The original version of this story was published on HuffPost at an earlier date.

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Brit Awards 2026: Geese Star Max Bassin Censored During Political Speech

It’s fair to say that the censors had plenty to keep them busy during this year’s Brit Awards.

Saturday night’s Brits broadcast saw the sound being pulled on numerous occasions due to a variety of comments that were made over the course of the event.

One such moment came during musician Max Bassin’s acceptance speech, after he accepted the International Group Of The Year prize on behalf of his band Geese.

Choosing to keep things short, he began his speech by stating simply: “What’s up, ‘the Brits’? I just want to say, free Palestine…”

However, after Max said the word “free”, the audio was pulled, resulting in the rest of what he had to say being cut from broadcast.

It later emerged that Max concluded his speech: “Fuck ICE, go Geese.”

Many Brits viewers were quick to voice their upset at what appeared to be ITV censoring Max’s politically-charged speech right as the drummer was about to speak out in solidarity with Palestine.

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ITV bleeped out Geese’s speech saying Free Palestine😒😒

— James (@jamesIipa) February 28, 2026

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ITV bleeped out Geese’s speech saying Free Palestine😒😒

— James (@jamesIipa) February 28, 2026

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seeing ITV censor Geese saying free Palestine in real time feels so gross and dystopian

— brodie / knox (@brodiecantskate) February 28, 2026

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seeing ITV censor Geese saying free Palestine in real time feels so gross and dystopian

— brodie / knox (@brodiecantskate) February 28, 2026