Raise your hand if you’ve ever thought about brain health. No? Well, apparently it’s quite a big deal. And, there are things we absolutely should not be doing that — I hazard a guess – you are doing every single day. I know I certainly have been.
But why? How do these three things affect our mood and brain age? If you open your phone first thing in the morning, like to indulge in highly processed food and engage in a little negative self-talk (my personal fave), then you’re going to want to read this.
Time to cut out morning screen-time
Does this sound like you? Wake up in the morning, reach for phone, scroll, scroll some more and then get up?
If it does, this could be why throughout your day you’re addicted to checking your phone. Here’s why.
Turns out, there’s a science to waking up well, and it’s all to do with brain waves.
When you wake up, your brain goes from producing theta to alpha waves. These tell your body you’re in a state of restful wake, rather than sleeping or extremely relaxed. And, according to Emily, this is a time when you are more susceptible to programming. So whatever content you’re consuming will have a greater impact on your mindset.
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The result? In her TikTok, Emily says, “It messes up dopamine for the day so we continue to check our phones.”
*Adds traditional alarm clock to basket immediately*
Put a stop to the negative self-talk
“What you say to yourself matters, and the more you say the more it gets wired in. And what’s wired in is what we manifest,” says Emily.
She’s not wrong – the way you speak to yourself affects cognitive function. So if you’re engaging in negative self-talk, you’re more likely to rewire your brain to believe it. Whereas if you opted for affirming language you could teach yourself to feel more positive about yourself.
It’s easy to get caught up in self-flagellating thought processes, there’s enough going on in the world to make us feel bad about ourselves. From comparison on social media to feeling under pressure to achieve more at work.
Approaching these moments with self-compassion and acceptance can help us overcome some of these negative cycles, as can cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT).
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No more eating ultra-high processed foods (cries in McDonald’s)
In a study conducted by ZOE, they found that those who ate the least amount of ultra-processed foods experienced slower cognitive decline.
Eating these foods is especially bad for you if you’re over 60, but — there’s some good news. Interestingly, the researchers in this study were only able to identify links between ultra-processed foods and cognitive decline in people with a “generally unhealthy diet”.
A lot of healthy foods and naughty little treats from time to time won’t do you much harm.
It comes amid the ongoing row over the corporation’s refusal to describe Palestinian militant group Hamas as terrorists.
However, it is understood Davie’s appearance at Committee Room 14 in the House of Commons was arranged in July, before the controversy.
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Asked why he had been invited to attend the meeting, a 1922 Committee source said: “We thought it would be interesting.”
Labour shadow minister Justin Madders said: “If the Director General of the BBC wants to talk to MPs he should talk to all of them of all parties, not just some.”
High-profile figures, including tech billionaire Bill Gates, have spoken to the 1922 committee before.
But Davie’s appearance is controversial because he is a former Tory Party member and twice stood for election as a Conservative councillor in the 1990s.
Many Tory MPs are also highly critical of the BBC’s political coverage, which they believe has a left-wing bias.
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BBC sources said Davie meets a range of people as part of his role and will be meeting Labour parliamentarians in the coming weeks.
But Labour sources said there were no plans for him to address a meeting of the Parliamentary Labour Party.
Security minister Tom Tugenhadt criticised the corporation’s reporting of the Al-Ahli hospital blast in Gaza City during an interview on BBC Breakfast yesterday.
A post on X (formerly Twitter) by BBC World said: “Hundreds of people have been killed in an Israeli strike on a hospital in Gaza, according to Palestinian officials.”
Israel has denied responsibility for the carnage, which it has blamed on a misfiring rocket by the Hamas militant group.
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US president Joe Biden was due to meet with Arab leaders in the region, but those talks were cancelled in the wake of the blast.
Tugenhandt was asked by presenter Charlie Stayt who the UK government thought was responsible for the hospital deaths.
He said: “We’ve seen some pretty wild speculation and some rushing to headlines in recent days.
“This is first and foremost a human tragedy. We know that some people have been killed there and we also know that the Al-Ahli hospital was offering a service to Palestinian civilians that is incredibly needed at the moment.
“However, the reporting that we’ve seen in recent days has already had a major cost. President Biden was due to meet with Arab leaders, including probably Mahmood Abbas of the Palestinian Authority, and to begin the conversations that could have led to peace.
“Those talks have been stopped – perhaps only pushed back, we hope – and that in itself as a cost. But we’ve also seen the destruction of a synagogue in Tunisia and sadly we’ve seen raising tensions in the United Kingdom.
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“This is one of those moments where wild speculation, fast and loose reporting, has real costs and consequences and I’m not going to engage in it.”
Alison Hammond has proven once again that her laugh is a tonic to us all, as she broke into hysterics on Friday’s This Morning.
During a segment on the happiness of finding unexpected change around the house, her co-host Dermot O’Leary outed Alison when she told viewers a story about a time she did a good deed.
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Alison told her co-stars: “I did find a note the other day. I was coming out of a car park and I was walking and I looked at the floor and I was like, that looks like a £20 note. It was! I picked it up and I donated it to charity.”
As the guests praised Alison’s actions and she smiled to the camera, Dermot pulled a face and interjected: “Hang on, when you say you donated it to charity…”
TheGreat British Bake Off host kept trying to move on and stick to the schedule, Dermot kept pestering her to “tell the truth” about what she did with the money.
As they both broke into hysterics, Alison wheezed through her infectious laughter: “I’m never telling you anything again!”
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Before Dermot revealed her secret to the audience: “She went to the charity shop and she bought a handbag for £15.”
“For charity” she choked through her tears of laughter, as she went on to admit: “I did keep the five pounds and buy some sweets with that one.”
Alison Hammond and Dermot O’Leary on This Morning
Later, Dermot added: “It was a lovely bag print,” as Alison laughed: “I am very grateful.”
Alison escorted the baker back to the house, after Tasha scummed to the intense heat during Chocolate Week.
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Her absence then threw the programme’s trusted formula into chaos, as Paul Hollywood and Prue Leith made the decision to not eliminate anyone from the competition, with the caveat that two would leave next week.
On October 1, 2021, after having what I had thought was routine thyroid surgery, I was diagnosed with anaplastic thyroid cancer, a cancer so rare that none of my doctors had ever seen it before. It’s so aggressive that it only exists as Stage IV.
The typical survival rate? Six months or less. One in five patients lives 12 months.
It’s October 2023.
I did a 10K race in July. At 6,000 feet. Last winter, I was a ski instructor. I’m a rock ’n’ roll DJ at the mountain town station that I used to stream when I lived in New York, fantasising that I was living here. Now I am. I have the life I’d longed dreamed of.
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Every morning, as I watch the sun come up over the mountains I never thought I’d live in again, I give thanks for everything in my life that brought me to this moment. Especially that diagnosis. It taught me that I had no time to waste. It taught me how much I love life — rough, bumpy and hard as it often is. It taught me how much more I wanted to do. And now I’m doing it.
But on that fall day in 2021, I was terrified. I was also furious.
I was two years out from a divorce after an unhappy marriage that I had long wanted to escape but had been afraid to leave. I felt I’d spent years quashing my voice and my spirit to keep that marriage going. Being a wife had become my identity. When the marriage tanked, I felt betrayed by the society that still pushed the fallacy that a woman had to have a man to be something. I felt betrayed by the husband who dumped me. Most of all, I felt I had betrayed myself by staying instead of standing up for myself and leaving.
I was desperate to resurrect the young woman I’d been back when I’d first gone to New York for grad school after ski bumming in Aspen. That me had planned on spending just a few years in the city before returning to the mountains. But you know how it goes: I met a guy, fell in love, marriage, kids, mortgages. And, hey, New York is pretty damn fun — until it nearly kills you.
Courtesy of Kate Rice
The author after her second surgery, this one at MD Anderson in Houston, in October 2021.
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The final years of my marriage, the divorce and its aftermath were brutal. I routinely woke at 3 a.m. staring into the darkness. My weight plummeted. I landed in the ER with what I thought might be a heart attack but was really a panic attack.
I struggled to pull myself together. I kept on running. I became a certified yoga sculpt instructor. I read self-help books. I not only talked to my therapist once a week, I sent her email after email filled with grief and fury.
And then I did something I never thought I would do: I started singing rock ’n’ roll. Onstage! Me! Who had all but died when faced with piano recitals at St. Patrick’s School. In high school plays, I stayed behind the scenes and did makeup and worked on costumes. I was solidly in the audience.
But now I was running from the firestorm of my old life. I came to a cliff, closed my eyes and jumped. I was desperation personified when I took that leap. I was shaky as hell, but singing in the spotlight gave me a solid piece of ground in a world that had turned into quicksand.
The stage was a place where I could escape my pain for a few hours. But it was still there. The wounds wrought by my past were still raw inside me, haunting my dreams and shadowing my days.
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COVID hit. Stages everywhere, including mine, went dark. I lost my refuge. I still planned to leave New York and return to the mountains, but I was waiting for my youngest child to graduate from high school.
She went off to college. I stayed in New York. COVID still raged. I rationalised it was a bad time to move to a town where I knew no one. And I thought my kids should still have their mama’s place to come home to in New York, even though my new apartment was a fraction of the size of the one they’d grown up in.
Courtesy of Kate Rice
The author power-walking with her IV pole, nicknamed Slim, during her MD Anderson treatment.
What it all boiled down to, though, is that I was afraid to leave. Yet again.
So the universe kicked me in the butt. Hard.
As I lay in my bed on that October night in 2021 after being told I had just months to live, I railed against my fate. What gives, universe?I thought we were in sync! C’mon!
I knew one thing: I was getting the hell out of New York. But I wasn’t going to the mountains. I was going to Houston, one of the flattest places in the United States. It’s also home to the MD Anderson Cancer Center, which my cousin discovered has a special clinic — named FAST — that specializes in my type of cancer.
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I packed up what I thought I would need in Houston. I ran around New York gathering my medical records. I went out to dinner and drank margaritas with friends.
And then I bought something many people facing cancer like mine would never think to buy: a T-Card, a discount ski pass for Telluride Ski Resort, near where one of my brothers lives in Colorado.
I bought it because of one line in the anaplastic thyroid cancer printout I’d gotten the day of my diagnosis. After learning I probably had just six months to live, I read this sentence: “Despite these discouraging figures…” (Discouraging? I had thought as I read it. What comedian wrote this?) “…there are some long-term survivors.”
“I’m going to be one of them,” I had promised my daughters. We were all crying. “I don’t know how, but I will.”
And that was why I made the decision to buy that ski pass. I was going to do more than live — I was going to be strong and healthy enough to ski. And this purchase was going to be the thing that kept me fighting no matter what came my way.
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See that, universe? I thought as I clicked the “buy now” icon.
Courtesy of Kate Rice
The author at the mic at KPCW radio.
Five days after my diagnosis, I walked in the doors of MD Anderson.
The FAST clinic was aptly named. MD Anderson kept me on the run. I liked that. I had CT scans, PET scans, brain scans, MRIs, blood tests. I even got to look at my vocal cords during a laryngoscopy.
I had a second surgery.
“The odds aren’t good,” the surgeon told me. And then he added, “But we do cure some people with this cancer.”
I had five weeks of radiation and chemo. I stayed with my cousin in Houston. She has a big house, a bigger heart and a long-suffering husband. Both of my daughters, one accompanied by her boyfriend, came to cheer me on. Each of my three brothers (one with his almost house-trained new puppy), my sister and three of my besties from New York came, one after another. We talked. We power-walked. We partied. I had Zoom calls with friends and family. I couldn’t drink alcohol, but I asked everyone I knew to drink for me. And they did.
I finished my treatment. I rang the proverbial bells, one for my last chemo treatment and one for my last rad cure, as I had started calling radiation. But I wasn’t done with MD Anderson. I had to come back every two months to get scanned. Anaplastic thyroid cancer is like Rasputin — it comes roaring back 80% of the time.
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At one point, I noticed a small growth on my face. “It looks fine to me,” said my radiation doctor. “But you never can tell with this cancer. I’m sending you to dermatology.”
The growth was benign and the dermatologist just froze it off, but I remembered the doctor’s respect for this cancer and the need for constant surveillance.
I headed to the mountains of Colorado to be near my Telluride brother. I rented an Airbnb near his family’s home in case my radiation side effects got bad. I hired a moving company to empty my apartment back in New York and put my belongings in storage in Hoboken.
I was scared. I could feel unfamiliar prickling sensations in my neck. Was it just after effects of radiation? Or was it something terrible?
Courtesy of Kate Rice
The author running a 10K in Park City, Utah, in July 2023.
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Two days before Christmas, I got a call from Houston.
“We think you’re a good candidate for immunotherapy,” the nurse told me. “Can you come back to Houston next week?”
Damn straight I could.
I flew back to Houston. CT and PET scans showed I was still disease-free. I was the perfect candidate for immunotherapy.
“Basically,” my endocrinologist told me, “it opens your immune system’s eyes to cancer.”
It helps my body keep me healthy and disease-free.
“Go back to Colorado and ski,” my endocrinologist told me. “Just don’t break any bones.”
As I walked out of MD Anderson after hearing the good news, I wept tears of joy and gratitude. The deadly cancer I’d been diagnosed with had just become a disease that is chronic but manageable.
On a cold but clear blue-bird-sky January day in 2022, I stepped into my skis and glided over to Lift 7 at Telluride. The liftie scanned my T-Pass and up I went.
On that first run down the hill, I revelled in the moment. The sparkling snow. The crisp air. The sky above me. Skis, mountain, snow, gravity and me, all working together. I was alive!
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I wanted to do that first run on my own, but then I caught up with my brother. He and I and one of his ski buddies rode up the Prospect Express lift together.
“What brings you here?” the friend asked me.
I took a deep breath and exhaled.
Courtesy of Kate Rice
The author’s first time back in her skis and using her T-Pass at Telluride after she finished her cancer treatment (January 2022).
“Well,” I said. And I told my story — Aspen, New York, love, marriage, divorce. And cancer.
“I always planned on returning,” I told him. “And now, finally, I have.”
The friend was silent for a moment and then he looked at me.
“Welcome back,” he said.
Kate Rice is a runner, rock ’n roll singer and stand-up comic who performs mostly in the shower but sometimes on stage. She’s an author and former reporter. She lives in Park City, Utah, where she is a ski instructor and rock ’n roll radio DJ. Her new memoir, “Cured: A Tale of Badassery,” will be released on November 15, 2023.
ITV’s daytime telly behemoth This Morning has really been through it recently, but is now entering a new chapter as it searches for new co-hosts to replace Phillip Schofield and Holly Willoughby.
She said: “I couldn’t cope with the early starts. I don’t do mornings. They have to be there at like, 8am. I’m a night owl. But, of course, the idea is flattering.”
Seems like fair reasoning to us, AJ.
AJ with Big Brother co-host Will Best
Shutterstock for Big Brother
She also added that she prefers to keep a low-profile – despite currently being watched by the nation nightly on Big Brother.
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“I think, because I live in London, everyone is quite used to seeing people and no one really gives me much notice,” she explained.
“It’s only when I open my mouth, and they hear my voice that I seem to get recognised. I think I got more attention when I was out and about when I was doing Strictly.”
This Morning had been hosted by Phillip Schofield from 2002 and Holly Willoughby from 2009, with the pair presenting together until May this year, when the former stepped down before later admitting to an “unwise but not illegal” affair with a younger colleague.
Phillip Schofield and Holly Willoughby hosting This Morning earlier this year
As the search for Phillip and Holly’s replacements continue, married couple Marvin and Rochelle Humes have been highly-touted names, while Davina McCall, Kate Garraway and Ben Shephard are also said to be in the running.
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Other frontrunners include current rotating presenters like Alison, Dermot, Josie and Craig.
It said: “Russian sources expressed pronounced concern about ongoing Ukrainian activity on the east bank of Kherson Oblast and framed these activities as part of a potential larger Ukrainian operation.”
Ukraine has previously struggled to reclaim any of this area.
Rybar claimed on Tuesday night that Ukrainian formations near the destroyed Antonisky bridge had moved forwards, and occupied a village.
Increasing its presence on the other side of the river would enable Kyiv to send troops, tanks and artillery across, and apply more pressure to the Russian forces on that long frontline.
The Russian ministry of defence has acknowledged Ukrainian operations too, according to ISW, claiming they stopped four Ukrainian sabotage and reconnaissance groups near Kherson City.
ISW also reported: “The milblogger reacted to the reported [Ukrainian] assault on the night of October 17 to 18 by accusing the Russian MoD of not taking the threat of a Ukrainian crossing seriously.”
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In another indication that Ukraine’s progress in Kherson is troubling Moscow, the Russian president Vladimir Putin recently described Ukrainian activity in Kherson as the “next counteroffensive”.
But, as ISW noted, the Russian president has also “continued his typical rhetorical line by painting all Ukrainian offensive operations as a failure”.
The think tank has a policy of not forecasting Ukrainian actions though, so it did not speculate over the possibility that Kyiv will launch an offensive over the Dnipro river any time soon.
Still, ISW added: “It is noteworthy that prominent and generally reliable Russian sources are discussing Ukrainian activities on the east bank as occurring at a larger scale than previously documented.”
The world’s attention has understandably been focused on the Middle East in recent days, and is likely to remain so for some time to come.
But two by-elections on Thursday have the potential to be much more politically significant for Rishi Sunak.
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The Tories are defending two nominally safe seats, in Mid Bedforshire and Tamworth.
It is no exaggeration to say that, were the Conservatives to lose both of them, the party could swiftly go into meltdown.
In Mid Beds, the Tories are defending a 25,000 majority, while in Tamworth, the party won the seat in 2019 by 20,000 votes. On paper at least, they should be unassailable.
But given the government’s unpopularity, and the circumstances which led to the by-elections, both Labour and the Lib Dems still hold out hopes of causing an upset.
The contest in Mid Bedfordshire has been caused by the resignation of Nadine Dorries after she was denied the peerage promised to her by Boris Johnson.
Both parties insist they are best placed to win, leading to the very real possibility of the anti-Tory vote being split, thereby allowing Conservative candidate Festus Akinbusoye to get elected.
Tamworth is a straight shoot-out between the Tories and Labour, who are odds-on favourites with the bookies.
Nevertheless, Labour insiders insist the prospect of winning either seat is a “moonshot”.
One shadow cabinet member told HuffPost UK: “They’re two very safe Tory seats and it would take a miracle for Labour to win either. Mid Beds is a genuine three way split, but still a real long shot.”
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Shadow science, innovation and technology secretary Peter Kyle, who is Labour’s campaign co-ordinator in the seat, said: “I think objectively anybody looking at all of the campaigns would rather be in our position than the others, but this is unlike anything I’ve experienced and uncertainties are constantly lurking.”
But another Labour MP said: “Mid Beds is the Tories for the keeping – no chance of that turning red.
“And to be quite honest, we don’t need it anyway. It’s not a target seat of ours and this isn’t a general election. If anything, it’s amusing that the Tories will frame it as a big win when all they’ve done is keep a seat that is already theirs.”
Labour sources insist winning in Tamworth – where Pincher received 68% of the vote at the last election – would be an even bigger achievement than the party’s stunning victory in Selby and Ainsty in July.
But a senior Tory MP told HuffPost: “I reckon our chances are poor in Tamworth because of how grim Chris Pincher’s reason for leaving was. I think people will punish the party for what he did and vote against us as a protest for all the sleaze we’ve seen in recent years.”
And a Labour MP said: “We do feel good about Tamworth. We know we have the power to overturn such huge majorities, as we’ve done it before.
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“This seat in particular often reflects wider politics. It was Labour under Blair and Brown, Tory after that. And now, reflecting how well Labour are doing in the polls, I think that trend will continue.“
Defeat for the Tories would be as much of a psychological blow as an electoral one.
It’s the constituency of former Conservative prime minister Robert Peel, who in 1834 published the Tamworth Manifesto, which paved the way for the modern-day Tory Party.
One Labour MP dispensed with the usual pre-by-election caution and predicted a glory night for the party.
We’ve got both seats in the bag,” the MP said. “It doesn’t matter where the constituency is, or its history – the public want a change and are fed up of Tory lies.
“Their loyal voters are doubting them too, and we will see that on Thursday.”
I turn 30 in less than two weeks and I’ve only been in one “relationship.”
I was 19 when I met Greg on Grindr. I understand now that the way I felt about Greg is the way I often feel about intimate partners: We enjoyed each other’s company, I found him physically attractive and I could be physically and emotionally intimate with him, but we lacked that “spark” I so often hear about when it comes to romantic partnerships.
I never had even had a crush on Greg; I just enjoyed his company and was excited to finally be in a relationship, this thing that so many people seemed to be after.
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We were together for just shy of three months before he broke it off. Right before we split, my dad asked me if I loved Greg. I struggled with the question because it wasn’t something I had even considered. I wavered for a while before I finally said, “maybe … probably” — less because it was how I felt and more because it seemed like the correct answer.
I’ve tried dating a number of times since, but I could never find that warm, gushy feeling, the romance that I’d heard others describe as they pursued new relationships. I enjoyed talking with new suitors and was sometimes attracted to them, but the idea of being in a romantic relationship felt stifling and inauthentic.
Eventually, I realised I was aromantic, which means having little or no romantic attraction to others.
Romance, like gender and sexuality, can be understood as a spectrum. There are folks who fall hard and quickly, easily developing crushes on others, and there are people like me, who simply don’t gravitate to those feelings easily or at all. I am open to the possibility that one day I will have a crush or fall in love, but so far it hasn’t happened.
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Not all aromantic people are asexual. I’m surely not. And aromantic people still have love in their lives; they just get it outside of romantic relationships. My life is full of love from my friends, family, even my intimate partners — it’s just not romantic love, that special bond that’s so difficult to put into words (especially as a person who’s never experienced it).
The fact that I have gone the entire decade of my 20s without being in a traditional romantic relationship is often met with a sense of confusion from my peers. This used to feel alienating, but today I know that it isn’t because of some personal fault. The traditional approach to committed relationships just isn’t for everyone.
Since I still crave physical intimacy and sex, I enjoy having partners I can explore those elements of myself with. But our relationships don’t come with many of the same feelings or tethers that a romantic relationship typically would.
I find it challenging to date in a traditional sense. In my mid-20s, after recognising that I was aromantic, I found the term “quasiplatonic relationship.” Quasiplatonic relationships are not romantic but still involve a close connection, often beyond what we may see in a friendship. They may or may not involve sex.
While these might not look like the “traditional” versions, some aromantic people have long-term partners. Some cohabitate and even get married. Seeking out this kind of relationship was a challenge for me, however. Trying to find another person who was a good fit, and who was also looking for a relationship that wasn’t traditionally romantic, started to feel just as restrictive as shooting for a committed romance.
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Over time, the idea of seeking out and being with a single monogamous partner also began to feel extremely limiting. Nonmonogamy wasn’t really a conscious choice I made; rather, it eventually clicked that there was no other option for me. As an aromantic person with different relationship needs than most, having multiple partners who could offer me a number of different things felt most conducive to my identity as I was beginning to understand it.
Eventually, I stumbled upon the phrase “relationship anarchy,” which to me means my relationships have a more fluid structure, without hierarchical differentiation between sexual, romantic and platonic relationships.
After a decade of trying to fit inside one specific box society deemed “correct,” I’ve found solace in stepping outside of it and creating my own box, one that works for me.
Today, I have a number of relationships in which I embrace varying levels of intimacy. Some are mostly physical; others feel more like close friendships. We’re invested in each other’s lives, we hang out together ― some on a regular basis, and others simply when we can make it work ― and sometimes we share physical intimacy. I now understand that I operate best by simply letting things flow and figuring out naturally how a person fits into my life.
This year I started a relationship with a man who is in an open marriage. This dynamic feels comfortable for me, in that we can share a connection without there being broader romantic expectations — we aren’t necessarily aiming for anything bigger. We’re focused on the now, whatever we end up cultivating together. We talk intimately about our lives and goals. We do things that friends would do together. Sometimes we have sex, but it’s not an integral part of our relationship either.
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I consider myself single, and I prioritise my relationship with myself first and foremost. After the one with myself, some of the most valuable relationships in my life are those I have with my platonic friends. Most of my spare time goes to my best friend, and my relationship with her often feels the most profound and connected.
As a queer nonbinary person who is attracted to folks of all gender identities, I’ve begun to see the idea that we are all meant to have a single romantic partner in our lives as outdated, part of a rigid cisheteronormative system that exists to uphold traditional family structure.
I don’t want children and I’m not sure I ever want to get married, so for me that concept has often felt fraudulent. There’s nothing wrong with preferring traditional monogamous relationships, but humans are complicated, and the idea that all 8 billion of us should treat relationships in this one limited way ignores how expansive our identities can be. It’s selling our species short to insist we all conform to such stringent guidelines, and it ignores history and culture to claim that this has always been the case.
I currently have no desire to date, as I pretty much have everything I need. I am always open to new relationships, but I don’t have guidelines for what they “need to” offer me. It’s simply up to me and that other person to decide what works best for us.
As I write this essay, I am preparing to fly to my home state of Colorado to celebrate the weddings of two longtime friends. I love to see those I hold close find what they need and affirm it. I think romantic love is beautiful, and I’d love to experience it for myself one day. I also accept that maybe it just isn’t in the cards for me.
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I am open about my journey to give others like me, who have struggled with the standard relationship models, permission to venture out and explore their own paths. If there’s one thing my 20s have taught me, it’s that many of the rules and guidelines we have in society are arbitrary. I get so much validation from those in the younger generations who decided early on that they would go their own way, and from older folks who throw away the rulebook they’ve lived by for the majority of their adult lives.
I also admit that I don’t have it all figured out. I’ve settled on a dynamic that works for me today, but I leave myself open to any possibilities that present themselves as I journey through life, rather than comparing my experience to that of others. I can’t wait to see what lies ahead.
Britney Spears is reflecting on one of the most iconic moments of her career.
While fans undoubtedly remember her performing “I’m a Slave 4 U” with an albino Burmese python wrapped around her shoulders, Spears shares in her upcoming memoir what that iconic moment at the 2001 MTV Video Music Awards actually felt like — and says it was genuinely “terrifying.”
“The plan was for me to sing ‘I’m a Slave 4 U,’ and we decided I would use a snake as a prop,” writes Spears in an excerpt of her memoir, “The Woman in Me,” published Tuesday by People.
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“It’s become an iconic moment in VMAs history, but it was even more terrifying than it appeared,” she continues. “All I knew was to look down, because I felt if I looked up and caught its eye, it would kill me.”
Despite a surprise appearance by Michael Jackson, Spears and her seemingly effortless snake-charming stole the show.
“In my head I was saying, Just perform, just use your legs and perform,” Spears, who was 19 at the time, writes in her memoir. “But what nobody knows is that as I was singing, the snake brought its head right around to my face, right up to me, and started hissing.”
She continues: “I was thinking, Are you fucking serious right now?The fucking goddamn snake’s tongue is flicking out at me. Right. Now. Finally, I got to the part where I handed it back, thank God.”
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The snake itself was, hilariously, named Banana.
Her performance appeared effortless to millions, but Spears was genuinely terrified.
Kevin Mazur/WireImage/Getty Images
The moment is clearly visible around the 3-minute mark in official footage from MTV. But die-hard fans won’t have to rely on old recordings for new Spears stories much longer — she is set to candidly dish on her life and career in “The Woman in Me,” which hits shelves Oct. 24.
The millennial pop star has been on an extensive promotional run for the upcoming memoir, which her publisher says will explore “the impact of sharing her voice” in court battles over her controversial conservatorship and how “it changed the course of her life.”
But an NPR/PBS NewsHour/Marist National Poll released on Tuesday offered an early prediction: Biden would beat Trump by 7 percentage points when Kennedy is factored in.
If the election were held today, Biden would snag 44% of the vote to Trump’s 37%, followed by Kennedy’s 16% with 3% undecided, according to the survey.
Kennedy, whose anti-vaccine views appeal to some conservatives, is simply siphoning off more votes from Trump than Biden.
With the political scion on the ballot, Biden loses 5 percentage points among Democrats while Trump loses 10 points among Republicans, according to the poll.
Kennedy, who has received significant air time on Fox News and other conservative outlets, has been denounced by his own family, but come November 2024, he might just end up a darling for Democrats anyway.
“Although it’s always tricky to assess the impact of a third-party candidate, right now Kennedy alters the equation in Biden’s favour,” Lee M Miringoff, director of the Marist College Institute for Public Opinion, said. “What this does speak to, however, is that about one in six voters are looking for another option, especially independents.”
The poll, conducted on October 11 among 1,313 American adults, shows Biden leading Trump by 3 percentage points in a head-to-head contest.