An Expert Has Shared Their Comments On The Chinese Hot Water Trend

Posted on 16/01/2026 by Boris Clair

TikTok users are ‘becoming Chinese’ this month by embracing traditional cultural habits to level up their modern beauty and wellness routines. If you haven’t heard of this, you may need to get working on your algorithm as there have been 3.2 million views of this topic on the clock app.

The practice that they’re all racing to take part in is formally known as Yang Sheng (meaning “nourishing life”) and users are joking that they are ‘turning Chinese’ by taking part. The most common practice, and the one that has gone wild in the app is drinking hot water before bed which promises glowing skin and a healthier body.

The trend focuses on removing “internal dampness” and aiding digestion by moving away from iced drinks in favour of thermal flasks. That’s right. Iced coffees are finally out of fashion. I never thought I’d see the day, either.

But, does it work? And how does introducing this to your night time routine affect your sleep? To answer this, nutritionists and sleep experts at Mattress Online explain the benefits and potential drawbacks of this practice.

Does the Chinese hot water trend work?

Helen Ruckledge, Registered Nutritionist at Mattress Online advises: “There is no consistent research that suggests hot water aids digestion or reduces bloating more than cold water. It is certainly not the case that hot water speeds up the metabolism or makes you wake up with a flat stomach.

“Hydration is fundamental to many aspects of health. For example, it is well established that being dehydrated can increase your risk of constipation.”

Ruckledge assures that whatever works best for you when it comes to drinking water is what you should stick to, saying: “The key to hydration is to drink water in whichever way you enjoy the most, to encourage you to drink plenty. There is certainly no research to suggest that cold water is detrimental. Many people find it more refreshing when cold.

“Others find hot drinks comforting and prefer drinking water hot. Just a cautionary note, if you opt for hot, do boil the water and cool it rather than taking it out of a hot tap. And of course, ensure the water is not scalding hot when you drink it.”

As for whether drinking hot water before bed helps us to sleep…

Hannah Shore, Head of Sleep Science at Mattress Online says: “Drinking a cup of hot water before bed probably won’t directly affect your sleep; however, it could have some benefits. Taking the time to sit and drink a hot cup of water could be the perfect thing to build into your wind-down routine.”

She emphasises that the habit of slowing down before bed with a hot drink may be more beneficial than the drink itself, saying: “As adults, we often forget the importance of a wind-down routine, which should help relax the mind and body, prompting us that it’s time for sleep.

“In turn, if this is done in the right environment, it can prompt the body to create sleep-promoting hormones, such as melatonin, helping you to drift off to sleep more easily.”

Stay hydrated and rested wherever possible, basically.

10 Psychologist-Backed Ways To Ease Anxiety In 10 Minutes

Posted on 22/04/2025 by Boris Clair

According to Mental Health UK, over 8 million people in the UK live with an anxiety disorder. This equates to around just over 1 in 10 people. If you’re one of them, know that you are far from alone.

However, sometimes knowing that you’re not alone and that the thoughts and feelings you’re having are anxiety isn’t enough. In the throes of an anxiety episode, it’s hard to imagine feeling calm again.

However, according to Dr. Bijal Chheda, Consultant Psychologist and Founder of Nos Curare, sometimes all it takes is just a few moments to rest your mind and body, bringing your anxiety levels down and providing much-needed clarity.

10 steps to reduce anxiety in 10 minutes

Journal to prevent chronic stress

Dr. Chheda advises: “Writing down your thoughts can be a powerful tool for managing anxiety. A quick journaling session helps offload worries, especially about things that are hard to share with friends or family.

“Journaling can even help you gain a wider perspective on situations, helping prevent chronic stress from building up until you reach a breaking point.”

She adds that by putting pen to paper, you create a structured way to process emotions, making it easier to let go of anxious loops.

“Journaling can also become a therapeutic habit when done creatively. Use stickers or coloured pens in a small but intentional effort to make the practice more engaging.

“Establishing a routine, whether it’s daily or weekly, helps turn journaling into a ritual that supports reflection and personal growth.”

Sip a warm beverage to soothe the nervous system

From a cup of tea to a mug of hot cocoa, there’s a reason sipping a warm beverage feels so comforting – it has a direct impact on your nervous system.

Dr. Chheda says: “Warm drinks help activate the parasympathetic nervous system, otherwise known as the ‘rest and digest’ system. It sends signals to your body that it’s safe to relax by triggering the release of oxytocin, a hormone associated with relaxation.

“I suggest drinking herbal teas like chamomile or peppermint, both of which can be particularly effective in reducing tension, both physically and mentally. A warm mug of golden milk, made with turmeric and honey, is another soothing option that counteracts stress-induced inflammation.”

If you don’t fancy those, she advises that even a simple cup of warm water can have a calming effect.

“It’s best to avoid caffeinated drinks, such as coffee or fizzy drinks, as they can increase heart rate and cortisol (stress) levels.”

Tap on acupressure points (EFT tapping) to release anxiety

Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) involves lightly tapping specific acupressure points on the body while focusing on the anxiety-inducing thought.

“By stimulating specific parts of the body called ‘meridian points’, you can release emotional blockages and release negative emotions associated with a particular issue.

“It does this by calming the body’s ‘fight or flight’ response, and has been shown to reduce cortisol levels and calm the amygdala (the brain’s ‘fear centre’). By tapping on areas like the forehead, collarbone, under-eye area, and side of the hand, you can help interrupt anxious thought patterns and calm the mind.”

Meditate to slow down racing thoughts

Meditation is one of the most effective ways to ease an anxious mind, even when done in short bursts, the psychologist advises.

“Taking just a few minutes to focus on your breath while repeating an affirmation can create a sense of reassurance, especially in times of overthinking. This mindfulness practice can slow down racing thoughts and lower stress levels, shifting your mind away from ruminating.”

Power nap to boost energy levels

If anxious thoughts make you want to go straight to bed, good news – Dr. Chheda recommends just that. Only for 10 minutes, though.

“A quick power nap can work wonders for an anxious mind.

“When you’re exhausted, your body produces more stress hormones, which can make anxiety feel worse. Sleeping, even for just 10 minutes, can reduce mental fatigue as well as improve mood and focus, enabling you to concentrate and handle demanding situations.”

Count backward from 100 to ground yourself

Anxiety often thrives in a restless mind, making it difficult to focus.

“A simple grounding exercise like counting backward from 100 can redirect your mind away from spiralling thoughts and act as a mental ‘pause’ button. You can say each number out loud or only in your mind, but make sure you do the countdown slowly and intentionally.

“Engaging your working memory with a structured task can help you interrupt the anxious cycle and bring your attention back to the present moment. If you still feel anxious afterwards- don’t worry, simply repeat the process until you feel grounded.”

Try exercise snacking to trigger feel-good hormones

If the thought of doing long stretches of exercise does nothing but make your anxiety worse, Dr. Cheeda recommends doing short bursts of exercise for 2-10 minutes in something that’s called ‘exercise snacking’.

“This approach is especially helpful for managing anxiety, as these brief sessions effectively release physical tension and lower stress hormones without the need for a full workout.

“Simple examples of exercise snacks for anxiety relief include a 10-minute brisk walk, stair climb, deep stretching or a quick set of squats and lunges. These mini workouts provide immediate relief by triggering the release of endorphins (the feel-good hormones) and rapidly reducing cortisol levels.”

Have a digital detox to refocus

According to UK Addiction Centres, people in the UK are spending over 24-hours every week online, and of those surveyed, more than half admitted to having an internet addiction.

Dr. Cheeda recommends that people take a break from their phones saying: “Screens are a constant source of mental stimulation and entertainment, but excessive exposure can make anxiety worse. ‘Doomscrolling’, or the act of endlessly consuming negative news on social media, can overload the brain and heighten stress levels.

“Taking a short break from digital devices, even for just 10 minutes, allows your mind to reset and refocus on the present. A digital detox can help reduce mental clutter, limit exposure to digital noise, and give your eyes a much-needed break. Replace screen time with a calming activity such as journaling or meditating instead. You can also step outside, stretch, and simply enjoy a moment of quiet.”

Breathing exercises to regulate heart rate

When anxiety kicks in, your heart rate often speeds up, making you feel even more on edge.

When this is taking hold, Dr. Cheeda recommends controlled breathing exercises, such as deep belly breathing (focusing on the movement of your abdomen as you breathe) or box breathing (inhaling, holding, and exhaling all while counting to four), to regulate your heart rate.

“By slowing down your breath, your body transitions out of its ‘fight or flight response’ and signals to your nervous system that it’s safe to relax. In turn, this process also lowers your heart rate and blood pressure.

“This is why breathing techniques like these are commonly used in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) by qualified therapists, to help manage anxiety and panic attacks. Just a few minutes of focused breathing can help restore a sense of calm.”

Declutter your space for mental clarity

Your physical space can reflect your mental state. If you’re feeling anxious, tidying up a small area, like your desk, bedside table, or even just your bag, can create a sense of order, according to the psychologist.

“Clutter can act as a stressor, so cleaning up your space for 10 minutes can help create a calmer, more organised environment. As well as this, decluttering can serve as a small, tangible achievement that signals to your brain that you’re regaining control over your surroundings.

“However, don’t tackle everything at once to avoid being overwhelmed, I advise to go slowly by choosing a specific area or category to declutter first. As well as this, consider regularly getting rid of things that don’t bring you joy or serve a purpose anymore.”

Help and support:

Mind, open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393.
Samaritans offers a listening service which is open 24 hours a day, on 116 123 (UK and ROI – this number is FREE to call and will not appear on your phone bill).
CALM (the Campaign Against Living Miserably) offer a helpline open 5pm-midnight, 365 days a year, on 0800 58 58 58, and a webchat service.
The Mix is a free support service for people under 25. Call 0808 808 4994 or email help@themix.org.uk
Rethink Mental Illness offers practical help through its advice line which can be reached on 0808 801 0525 (Monday to Friday 10am-4pm). More info can be found on rethink.org.

For A Long Life, This 1 Sleeping Habit Matters Most (And It’s Not How Long You Sleep For)

Posted on 23/02/2025 by Boris Clair

I’m not trying to stress you out here, as stress can impact your sleep, but as we age, it’s essential that we really get our sleeping habits in check. This is because how we sleep can impact how we age.

For example, experts recommend that adults go to bed no later than 1am, regardless of their circadian rhythms, to ensure healthy ageing.

Additionally, poor sleep habits can make your brain age faster.

So, yes, it is all a little intimidating because what are adults if not perpetually tired?

There is a simple change you can implement which will make a significant difference

According to a new study published in the aptly-named journal Sleep, having a regular sleeping pattern of going to bed and getting up at the same time every day is a stronger predictor of your mortality risk overall than sleep duration.

The research found that even people who consistently get 7–8 hours – but who had irregular sleep schedules – each night are at a higher risk of strokes, heart attacks and even cancer than those who slept less but had a consistent schedule.

Those with the most consistent sleeping patterns had up to 48% lower risks of all-cause mortality compared to those with the least consistent routines.

The experts at BBC Science Focus warn: “Unfortunately, this doesn’t mean you can get away with sleeping only four hours a night just by sticking to a regular 3am bedtime – getting enough (but not too much) sleep still matters.

“In the study, those getting under six hours or over nine each night were at an increased risk of mortality. However, although sleep duration was still important, the link between mortality and regular sleep patterns was stronger and more consistent.”

How to get a more consistent sleeping pattern

The sleep experts at The Sleep Foundation advise: “Try to follow the same steps each night before going to bed, such as dimming the lights, quietly reading or stretching, putting on pyjamas, and brushing your teeth.

“Over time, those actions become cues that tell your body that it is time for sleep. To promote mental tranquility, incorporate relaxation methods such as meditation, yoga, listening to soothing music, or reading.”

They Might Seem Gross, But These 5 ‘Bad Habits’ Are Actually Good For You

Posted on 11/02/2025 by Boris Clair

If you think you do not have any bad habits, you’re lying to yourself. We all do. It’s fine!

Do I need to see my loved ones picking their noses? Not so much – but if they do it in the comfort of their own homes, no judgement here. We all have our vices, right?

We need a little less shame about our misdeeds and a little more acceptance. Especially since, it turns out, some of our favourite bad habits can actually be good for us.

The bad habits that can be good for you

Farting too much

Of course, we all know that farting once or twice a day is normal but excessive farting just seems… a bit much? A bit gross? Well, it turns out we are all prudes because actually, Healthline advises that the average person farts 10-20 times a day.

Additionally, Harvard Health explains: “It’s normal to have some air in the digestive tract. Air accumulates when you swallow, and the process of digestion generates gases as well.

“When too much builds up, the body releases it. Passing gas keeps the pressure within the intestinal tract low and prevents painful stretching of the stomach and intestines.”

Swearing

Swearing is definitely more socially acceptable these days but of course, not everybody is comfortable with it and if you’re a super sweary person, you may feel that it’s a habit you need to break.

However, it can actually be good for you. A study from Keele University found that swearing can increase a person’s pain tolerance by up to 33%. What’s more, another study suggested it can be a great coping mechanism for dealing with stress.

So, if you need a good ol’ profanity-filled rant, go for it.

Sleeping in

Sleeping in sounds like something we all want to do more but, realistically, waking up later than planned can leave us feeling like we’ve ‘wasted’ a day.

However, if you tend to sleep poorly through the week and treat yourself to a restful snooze at the weekend, you could be doing wonders for your heart health, according to a study published by the European Society of Cardiology.

The experts report: “For the significant proportion of the population in modern society that suffers from sleep deprivation, those who have the most ‘catch-up’ sleep at weekends have significantly lower rates of heart disease than those with the least.”

20% less, in fact. Treat yourself.

Gossiping

We are all well aware that gossiping can be harmful but, when done properly, it is both harmless and actually good for you socially.

Last year, HuffPost UK reported: “Gossip can be good for disseminating information about people’s reputations, which can help recipients of these tips connect with cooperative people while avoiding selfish ones.”

Just, don’t go too hard on people OK?

Not showering daily

Personally, I shower every other day. I feel a little gross when I admit this to others but I am pretty happy with my routine.

Thankfully, Harvard Health backs this approach, saying: “While there is no ideal frequency, experts suggest that showering several times per week is plenty for most people (unless you are grimy, sweaty, or have other reasons to shower more often).

“Short showers (lasting three or four minutes) with a focus on the armpits and groin may suffice.”

Excellent.

I’m A Mattress Expert — These 4 Signs Mean It’s Time To Replace Your Mattress

Posted on 08/02/2025 by Boris Clair

One of the biggest expenses when moving into your own home is a bed and mattress. Matresses are deeply personal purchases — finding one that fits your sleep style, your physical needs and those of your partner is a precise process — but unfortunately, it’s advised that we replace them every six to eight years.

Which frankly seems too often, given how much a good mattress costs.

However, according to Mattress expert Steve Adams, CEO of Mattress Online, there can be signs even earlier than this that your mattress needs to be replaced.

Four signs your mattress needs to be replaced

You’re waking up feeling stiff and achy

If you start your day with stiffness or aches that fade as the day goes on, Adams warns that your mattress might be to blame.

He explains: “Over time, our body and sleep needs may change meaning the mattress that was once suitable, may not be any more, this can lead to increased pressure points and discomfort.

“Poor sleep caused by a mattress which is unsupportive and does not meet our sleep needs can even lead to longer-term health issues if left unchecked.”

The mattress is sagging or uneven

It’s time to give your mattress a good look and ask if you can see any excessive sagging, lumps or indentations where you sleep.

According to Adams, these are signs that internal materials have broken down. He says: “Some materials will have natural settlement, such as fibres – but an extreme amount of sagging can lead to discomfort, high areas of pressure and speed up the degradation of other areas of the mattress, all which will make it harder to get a restful night’s sleep.”

Allergies are getting worse at night

Ugh, there is nothing worse.

If you have noticed that you are sneezing more often, your eyes are more itchy and sensitive or you are simply more congested when you sleep, it could be your mattress that’s to blame.

This is because over time, mattresses accumulate dust mites, mould, and other allergens that might be triggering your symptoms.

Adams advises: “If washing your bedding and using allergy covers doesn’t help, it may be time to replace your mattress altogether.”

Your mattress is making noise

Not only is this incredibly awkward if you’re doing the deed while others are home but a noisy mattress, particularly one that creaks or squeaks from springs is a clear sign of wear and tear.

Adams says: ” This noise suggests that the springs inside are deteriorating, compromising support and comfort. Swapping to a newer mattress with advanced materials could be the solution to both better sleep and a quieter night.”

Science Says You Should Say ‘No’ To That Party You’re Dreading

Posted on 29/12/2024 by Boris Clair

’Tis the season for indulging in food, premium telly, getting new, soft PJs, and cold, dark evenings that start at 4 PM.

And for some unholy reason, people have decided that now is also the perfect time to socialise. Make that make sense (can I please just enjoy my food coma without having to face Storm Gerrit or trousers with buttons on them?).

There’s nothing worse than realising that the dreaded social event you half-heartedly committed to months ago is coming up ― but a recent paper published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology suggests that saying “no” to the meet-up might actually not be as big a deal as we think.

Say more…

Julian Givi, an assistant professor of marketing at West Virginia University, conducted the study after stressing about declining a wedding invitation.

In his research, he found a separate study revealing that 77% of us had accepted an invitation to an event we didn’t want to attend.

“We worry about the negative ramifications that might arise. Will the person who offered the invitation be angry? Will they think I do not care about them? Will they invite me to do something again down the road?” Givi said.

So, he got over 2,000 participants to take part in five rounds of experimentation. Half of these took on the role of invitees, and half were inviters.

They were asked to imagine themselves in real and hypothetical situations, like asking (and being asked to) events like going to a museum. they were then asked how they’d feel if someone said “no.”

And?

“Invitees have exaggerated concerns about how much the decline will anger the inviter, signal that the invitee does not care about the inviter, make the inviter unlikely to offer another invitation in the future,” the study found.

“This asymmetry emerges in part because invitees exaggerate the degree to which inviters focus on the decline itself, as opposed to the thoughts that ran through the invitee’s head before deciding.“

In other words, you’re probably overthinking how much your host cares about your absence ― so let’s tuck into those leftovers and get going on that box set, shall we?

The 6 Most Common Issues Introverts Bring Up In Therapy

Posted on 03/08/2024 by Boris Clair

As someone who spends a lot of time alone, I’d call myself an introvert. Not only do I enjoy my own company, but also I need that time alone to recharge myself even if it was just from a tiny social interaction. However, on the other hand, extroverts get energised by being around people and receiving lots of stimulation.

With that said, sometimes society isn’t made to fit the needs of introverts, and it can be difficult to socialise and communicate. That’s where therapy comes in handy: It can help you navigate these situations and assist you in exploring your own inner life, making you more comfortable with your quieter nature and your needs that come with it.

Below, we asked therapists to share the most common topics introverts frequently bring up in therapy and why they usually come up. If you relate, you’re not alone.

Finding space to recharge their social battery

Everyone needs a bit of alone time every now and then. However, some need it more than others ― and it can be hard to achieve that when loved ones may not understand how important it is or if you don’t have the physical space to just be isolated.

“Many introverts may feel drained after socialising with friends, and it’s important for them to create space to recharge. This can be difficult if they live with a partner or roommate,” said Kristen Casey, a telehealth clinical psychologist and insomnia specialist. “In therapy, we usually discuss how to communicate their needs effectively to ensure their friends or family understand that the creation of space from others is not personal.”

Kristen Gingrich, a therapist and certified alcohol and drug counsellor, said that she usually tells her clients to go into a bathroom for five to seven minutes to ground themselves and recoup since it’s the place where you’re least likely to be bothered.

Setting boundaries with friends and loved ones

Many people find it difficult to set boundaries, but it can be even harder for introverts to speak up for themselves and communicate their needs.

“A lot of times, introverts talk about how they struggle to set boundaries because it can require more extroverted energy than they are comfortable with,” Gingrich said.

She added that when an introverted client is struggling with this, they may discuss ways to set boundaries that are clear and to the point, as sometimes it can be easy to get caught up in the discussion aspect as opposed to actually setting them.

Additionally, coping skills and distress tolerance skills are usually talked about because uncomfortable feelings and emotions will likely arise when setting boundaries, and it’s important for clients to know how to manage those in a healthy way when they come up.

Managing communication with friends

This isn’t a topic only introverts bring up in therapy, but it comes up often because it can be overwhelming to respond to texts and calls sometimes when your social battery is running low.

“The concept of answering phone calls or text messages may feel overwhelming for some introverts, and they may struggle with coaching their loved ones on their preferences for communication,” Casey said.

In these instances, the client might raise concerns around friends and family members taking their delay in response personally or viewing it as a sign that they don’t value the relationship, as opposed to it simply being a result of their needs.

“In therapy, we explore ways to coach friends and family on their preferences or how to answer briefly to maintain the relationship,” Casey said.

Setting boundaries and communicating with loved ones is important for introverts to maintain their alone time.

Managing overstimulation and irritability

After a while of socialising in a group setting, introverts will need that alone time to recharge their battery. When they can’t get that or have trouble communicating that need, it can sometimes lead to irritability ― a topic that introverts tend to bring up in therapy as they are looking for better ways to manage it.

“This is a thing I see with introverts and that is when they are overstimulated or their social battery runs empty, that they either shut down or it turns into irritability, which is really common,” Gingrich said.

In session, the therapist and client will together to discuss and build mindfulness skills and coping techniques to help prepare them for situations when they are highly irritable or overstimulated.

“We also talk about how to take accountability for the times where their irritability may get the best of them and come out towards other people,” Gingrich said.

Although it may be difficult, it’s important to take accountability and move forward in a more healthy and productive manner.

Wanting to find a romantic relationship

Dating is hard for just about anybody ― this includes introverts, who get easily drained by social interactions. Going on many dates can feel overwhelming for an introvert who needs frequent alone time to recharge.

“Clients often bring this up often because the idea of internet dating seems daunting with meeting lots of people and going out on different occasions,” said Heather Kent, a registered psychotherapist and trauma recovery specialist in Canada.

It’s not that introverts don’t want romantic relationships, but it can be hard to find the balance necessary to suit the needs of both people.

Dealing with societal pressure

Society places a lot of pressure on people to maintain the status quo in just about everything. However, introverts tend to find this hard when the extroverted personality is the default.

“Introverts often bring up how they worry about how others feel about them and that they feel a constant societal pressure to be involved in activities and engaged with friends,” Casey said. “They may also sometimes think that something is wrong with them, or that they aren’t living up to societal standards because of this.”

During sessions, she works with her clients to explore the need to adjust their own expectations with societal standards to ensure they feel seen and heard and live a life of their choosing. It’s more advantageous than trying to be someone you’re not.

Feel Guilty For Staying Indoors On Sunny Days? You’re Probably Experiencing This

Posted on 23/03/2024 by Boris Clair

Picture the scene: I’ve spent the entire week dreaming of the weekend. I’m no party animal so all I have planned is books, baths, and home-cooked meals three times a day. Quiet, calm, heaven.

Only, when the weekend arrives, it’s sunny and warm. A rarity in Britain and even more so in my home in Scotland. I should go out. I should go to the park to read. I should see my friends. It’s SUNNY, what am I doing indoors!?

But I don’t want to. My plans involved solely being indoors, at home. Which I stick with as a plan but feel guilty all weekend for doing so, and I worry that I’m missing out.

Sound familiar?

Well, apparently, this is called ‘Sunshine Guilt’.

What is sunshine guilt?

According to Dr. Nadia Teymoorian, a psychologist from the Moment of Clarity Mental Health Center that spoke with Bustle, sunshine guilt is that regretful feeling that settles in whenever you stay inside on a nice day, and it can be especially upsetting if you assume everyone else is outside and living their best life.

Apparently this is more common with people that live in cold places such as Scotland and Ireland. That checks out.

However, mental health campaigner and broadcaster Neev Spencer spoke with The Metro and said that the issue could be that we’re watching people enjoy sunny days on social media and assuming they’re happier and having a better time than we are.

He said: “Always ground yourself in the knowledge that what you see isn’t always what you get. You may see your friends or colleagues having the “time of their lives” in the sunshine, but bear in mind that if that were truly the case, they might not have had the time to take quite so many carefully curated pictures for their Instagram stories. Being present will always be 100% cooler than not.”

Being present in the bath, reading a book, is better than taking selfies on the beach. Commit that to memory.

Anxious At Christmas? Your Love Language Can Help You Cope

Posted on 20/12/2023 by Boris Clair

Andy Williams famously sung the words “it’s the most wonderful time of the year” but for a staggering 1 in 3 Brits, it’s a time for mental health “nosedives” according to Mental Health UK.

For many of us, it’s less a time of celebration and more to do with gritting our teeth and getting through it. There can be plenty of reasons for this including broken families, the pressure of expectation, and if you already have mental health problems, the overriding themes of joy can just make you feel more alienated than ever.

However, according to Emily Carr from CreateGiftLove, we can make the most of this season by identifying our love languages and using them to cope.

How love languages can help you cope with Christmas

If you appreciate words of affirmation, use them on yourself

Words of affirmation is a common love language and it basically means you tend to feel most loved and appreciated when people verbalise that to you. However, Carr urges that if this is you, you don’t need to wait for others to express their love.

She said: “Positive self-talk goes a long way. Create an affirmation and say it to yourself several times a day. Have it written on an object such as a keyring so that every time you see it, you’re reminded of that affirmation.”

She continued to say this is something that can actually ease anxiety. “Getting into the habit of using affirmations with breathwork can work to lower cortisol (the stress hormone) and ease anxiety,” she adds.

If you appreciate quality time, reframe how that seems to you during festivities

Quality time at Christmas doesn’t always feel like it’s worthwhile, even to those that recognise it as their love language.

Carr urges people to remember that quality time can be whatever you need it to be. If you’re not looking to get drunk at your pal’s Christmas party, maybe arrange a quiet evening with them in your home.

If you are all about acts of service, now is the time for familial Christmas elves

No, seriously. If you feel valued and loved from acts of service, ask your loved ones to help with your Christmas to-do list.

Whether that’s picking up gifts, helping you wrap them or even mundane house cleaning ahead of hosting guests. Your loved ones want to help you, and you value the help, it’s a win-win!

Receiving gifts doesn’t have to be costly

While you may feel most loved when you receive gifts, you’ll know that for you, it’s not about the price tag but instead the thought that went into a gift. It’s the same for your loved ones, too.

Don’t fall into debt trying to keep up with materialistic trends and instead get them something personal to them such as framed photographs.

If you love physical touch, prioritise that over the endless group chats

Festive season also means planning season and if you’re feeling overwhelmed by the endless threads planning parties, get togethers, and the day itself, mute them. Plan a certain time of day to reply and otherwise give yourself the mental headspace.

Instead, make plans for a cuddly date with your partner or even meet a friend for coffee and a Christmas hug.

If nothing else, remember it’ll be over soon enough and you just need to get through it by being kind and patient to yourself.

Help and support:

Mind, open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393.
Samaritans offers a listening service which is open 24 hours a day, on 116 123 (UK and ROI – this number is FREE to call and will not appear on your phone bill).
CALM (the Campaign Against Living Miserably) offer a helpline open 5pm-midnight, 365 days a year, on 0800 58 58 58, and a webchat service.
The Mix is a free support service for people under 25. Call 0808 808 4994 or email help@themix.org.uk
Rethink Mental Illness offers practical help through its advice line which can be reached on 0808 801 0525 (Monday to Friday 10am-4pm). More info can be found on rethink.org.

Can Somatic Shaking Help You Get Rid Of Your Anxiety?

Posted on 25/09/2023 by Boris Clair

“I swear to you, if you just did this one thing every day that takes less than five minutes, in three months from now, you’d be a completely different person.” “Okay,” I thought. “I’m listening.”

I was scrolling on TikTok one night when I came across a video by Emma Marschall, a holistic healing expert.

She was talking about the concept of somatic shaking: something that’s said to help release trauma, stress and anxiety.

“Each morning when you wake up, or whenever you feel like you need it you are going to do a somatic shaking practice,” she explains.

But what does somatic mean? Somatic therapy is a treatment that aims to treat mental and emotional conditions, like PTSD and anxiety, through the connections to mind and body, like grounding techniques.

“Put on one or two of your favourite songs that get you going, get you hype,” explains Marschall. “Plant your two feet on the ground (bonus points if you’re outside and get some negative electrons from the earth!) and keep them grounded the entire time.

Then all you have to do is… shake it out.

“Shake. Get that energy out,” she says.

But how can simply shaking your body help you feel less anxious?

When our bodies are stressed, we go into ‘fight or flight’ mode — when, back in the day, our cave people selves would have had to fight animals or tribes to survive, this mechanism would have come in very handy.

But now, our fight or flight mode can be triggered from a passive aggressive work meeting, or someone aggressively staring at us on the tube. When we’re stuck in one place and feel trapped, our bodies can store up this adrenaline and cortisol and cause us to experience anxiety, stress and mental overwhelm.

According to Dr Peter Levine, shaking can help release muscular tension, as well as burn this excess adrenaline which is triggered when we’re living in fight or flight mode when we’re constantly stressed, and calm the nervous system to its neutral state.

Animals have been known to shake to help regulate their systems. Think of a dog stretching and shaking after they get up, or when they’re scared. Some commented on Marschall’s video, saying they’ve noticed this themselves: “Dogs shake to rid themselves of anxiety so this actually makes sense,” commented one user.

And at the very least, a bedroom dance party can be a lot of fun. Try it tonight!