As A Psychologist, I See Where Parents Of Neurodivergent Toddlers Are Let Down

Posted on 31/03/2026 by Boris Clair

As a psychologist working with children and families, I often meet parents at a moment of both clarity and uncertainty.

They may have started to notice that their toddler experiences the world a little differently. Perhaps their child becomes overwhelmed in busy environments, struggles with communication or finds social interaction more difficult than other children their age.

For many families, recognising neurodivergence brings a sense of relief. But it is usually followed by a daunting question: how do we get the right support for our child?

In the UK, that journey can be particularly complex during the early years.

According to the Department for Education, around 1.6 million pupils in England are identified as having special educational needs, representing roughly 18% of the school population. Yet families with preschool children often face long waiting lists for assessments and limited access to early support.

This delay matters. Early childhood is a critical period for brain development. Evidence shows that early support programmes for neurodivergent children, particularly those on the autism spectrum, can significantly improve communication, social skills and everyday functioning.

When support arrives early, it does not change who a child is, nor should it. What it can do is help children develop strategies that make learning and taking part in daily life much more manageable.

The early years can be very difficult for families

The period after recognising that a child may be neurodivergent can be one of the most stressful times for parents.

Families are often required to navigate complex systems across health, education and social care, while also supporting their child’s day-to-day needs.

Research has shown that parents of neurodivergent children report significantly higher levels of stress during the early stages of seeking support, particularly when services are delayed or fragmented.

In practice, many parents become the main coordinator of their child’s support: they research therapies, push for assessments and adapt their home routines to help their child manage emotions and sensory challenges.

Yet this expertise is not always recognised by the professionals they encounter.

Challenging outdated advice

In my clinical work, I still hear well-intentioned but outdated advice offered to parents of neurodivergent toddlers. Comments such as “they will grow out of it” or “they simply need firmer discipline” reflect a misunderstanding of how neurodivergent children develop.

Research increasingly shows that behaviours often described as disruptive are more accurately understood as a child trying to express sensory, emotional or communication needs.

When a child struggles to join in with group activities or becomes overwhelmed in a busy environment, it is rarely deliberate defiance. It is often a sign that the environment does not yet suit the way their brain works.

A more helpful approach shifts the focus away from controlling the behaviour and towards understanding what is behind it.

What early years settings could do differently

Nurseries and early years settings are well placed to support neurodivergent children before formal schooling begins.

However, according to the Department for Education, many staff feel underprepared to recognise and respond to the different ways children develop and learn.

Inclusion means more than simply allowing neurodivergent children into mainstream settings. It means adapting those environments with calmer spaces, flexible routines, visual aids and genuine collaboration with families.

When these changes are made, the benefits extend to all children. Every young learner does better in an environment that feels predictable and safe.

One young child I worked with struggled to join in at nursery and was frequently described as disruptive. Staff were unsure how best to respond.

After introducing a simple visual timetable and a quiet space where the child could go when feeling overwhelmed, the difference in their participation was remarkable.

What changed was not the child but the environment. This reflects a broader principle: when we adjust our surroundings to meet a child’s needs, their ability to engage often grows considerably.

Dr Marguerita Magennis is a psychologist, educational consultant, counsellor and psychology tutor at FindTutors.

No Screens Before Two: Inside The UK’s Tough New Guidance For Babies And Toddlers

Posted on 26/03/2026 by Boris Clair

New screen time limits have been revealed for children in the UK under five.

The guidance, from the UK government, comes as almost one-quarter (24%) of parents of three‑ to five‑year‑olds say they find it hard to control their child’s screen time, and 98% of two‑year‑olds watch screens every day.

In response to parents calling for support on how much screen time is too much, as well as how to build healthy habits, the government shared new evidence-informed guidance for babies, toddlers and pre-schoolers.

What are the new screen time rules?

Under twos should avoid screen time other than for shared activities that encourage bonding, interaction and conversation (ie. FaceTiming family), per the new guidance.

Meanwhile two- to five-year-olds should stick to no more than one hour of screen time a day.

The government also advises avoiding screen time at mealtimes and in the hour before bed, so as not to disrupt sleep.

What else does the guidance say?

Opt for slow-paced, age-appropriate content.
Fast-paced, social media-style videos and AI toys or tools should be avoided for young children.
Parents are encouraged to watch or use screens together to make the experience more interactive, as talking, asking questions, and engaging with the content is better for children’s development.
Make safe screen swaps like reading bedtime stories together or playing simple games at mealtimes.

The guidance stems from the findings of an expert panel led by the Children’s Commissioner Dame Rachel de Souza and Professor Russell Viner, a paediatrician and expert in children’s health.

The panel reviewed the latest evidence on screen use in under-5s, and found long periods of time spent on screens alone can get in the way of activities critical for development.

Think: sleep, physical activity, creative play, and interaction with parents.

But not all screen use is equal.

Watching screens with an engaged adult where parents talk and ask questions is linked to better cognitive development than solo use.

Slow-paced content is also far better for development than fast-paced social media-style videos.

Evidence also suggests time limits shouldn’t apply in the same way for screen-based assistive technologies to support children with special educational needs and disabilities.

Prime minister Keir Starmer said: “Parenting in a digital world can feel relentless. Screens are everywhere, and the advice is often conflicting.”

The new guidance “cuts through the noise”, he added, “to keep children safe and make sure healthy habits are baked in from the start”.

Admitting that some will oppose the guidance, he added, “I will always stand on the side of parents doing their best for their children”.

Children’s Commissioner Dame Rachel de Souza said: “Young children need their parents to be confident in managing their screen use, but often this can be overwhelming for parents learning to navigate this.

“My hope is that this guidance helps to cut through the conflicting advice available and prioritise children’s development and wellbeing, as well as their safety.”

Neil Leitch, CEO of the Early Years Alliance, welcomed the new guidance and its emphasis on providing practical tips and advice for parents and carers.

He added he hopes it’s “the first step towards equipping children – and those supporting them – with the skills they need to thrive in an increasingly digital world and ensuring that technology enhances rather than undermines early learning and wellbeing”.

Could More Parents Get ‘Free’ Hours? The Government Is Looking Into UK’s Childcare System

Posted on 24/03/2026 by Boris Clair

Education secretary Bridget Phillipson has revealed she’s reviewing the free childcare eligibility thresholds impacting parents in England.

Under the current system, working parents are entitled to 30 hours of free childcare a week (for 38 weeks a year) after their child turns nine months old, up until they start school.

However if both parents earn less than £195 per week, or one parent earns more than £100,000 per year, this support isn’t available.

Phillipson told The Times: “We are going to continue to look at eligibility through the childcare review that we’re undertaking, and it does need to be simpler for parents.”

How does the current threshold work?

There is a lower and higher threshold, which means thousands of parents aren’t able to access support.

People who are aged 21 or over need to be earning more than £195.36 per week to be eligible for the free childcare offering. This drops to £160 per week for 18-20 year-olds and £120.80 per week for under-18s or apprentices.

Coram Family and Childcare’s latest annual Childcare Survey found families who are not eligible for the free hours – because they are not in work, do not earn enough or do not meet other criteria – have to pay an average of £189 per week for a part-time nursery place for a child under two.

It warned there is a risk that disadvantaged children are being priced out of accessing the same early years education as those in working families.

Lydia Hodges, from Coram, said the government’s childcare expansion is a “welcome support” for working families, but added there’s a “stark divide” between those eligible for support, and those who are not.

She said: “The focus on children being ‘school ready’ is gathering pace, but we have to ask a question about how much more difficult this will be to achieve for disadvantaged children in England, when they will now get only a third of the government-funded early education that children with working parents get, by the time they start school.”

There is also a higher threshold where one parent earning over £100,000 means couples aren’t able to access 30 free hours to pay for childcare either.

This means two parents could hypothetically earn £99,999 and receive 30 hours of free childcare a week; while another couple could have one person earning £101,000 and the other earning £5,000, and they would lose out.

As a result, parents have refused pay rises and bonuses, The Times reported, as the free childcare offering is better value.

All parents are able to access 15 free hours of childcare when their child turns three years old, regardless of income.

When will the changes be made?

We know both the lower and higher thresholds are under review between now and the next general election, which will be August 2029 at the latest.

Any changes that will be made are not imminent and form part of the government’s early years strategy.

Ultimately, Phillipson is keen to make the free childcare offering “more straightforward” for parents and the childcare sector, while also “getting the best possible outcomes from the money that’s being invested”.

HuffPost UK has contacted the government about when the outcome of the review is likely to be shared and will update the piece when we hear back.

Schools To Stock Adrenalin Pens And Train Teachers After 5-Year-Old’s Death

Posted on 04/03/2026 by Boris Clair

The parents of a five-year-old boy who died after accidentally being exposed to an allergen at school have welcomed the government’s new allergy plans for schools.

On 1 December 2021, Benedict Blythe went to school, as normal, yet a few hours later, his dad Peter received a call to say he’d been sick. When he arrived to pick up his son, it became clear he was seriously unwell.

Peter began CPR until an ambulance arrived. Sadly, despite medical help, Benedict was pronounced dead in hospital just after lunchtime.

An inquest into his death determined the five-year-old died from an accidental exposure to cow’s milk protein, which triggered fatal anaphylaxis.

His parents, Helen and Peter, have been fiercely campaigning for safety changes in schools ever since.

The couple have worked with clinicians, coroners, charities and parliamentarians to highlight gaps in allergy safety in schools and push for national protections so no other family suffers a similar fate.

And now it seems ‘Benedict’s Law’ is set to make real change.

The government has shared that under new statutory guidance, schools will have to stock life-saving adrenaline auto-injector pens, teachers will undergo compulsory allergy awareness training, and every school will need to have a dedicated allergy policy.

The guidance is currently open for consultation and will come into force in September 2026.

Helen and Peter said: “We are grateful that the government has listened to us, and that as a result a new generation of children with allergies will, from September, enter a school system far safer for them.

“Our son Benedict died aged just five years old, from an allergic reaction in school that was not only preventable but treatable.”

They added that if Benedict’s Law had been in place when their son joined his school, “he may still be alive”.

Helen and Peter Blythe, pictured with their children.

Food allergy affects around 7-8% of children worldwide, equivalent to roughly two pupils in every classroom. What’s more, roughly 30% of allergic reactions in schools occur in children previously undiagnosed with an allergy.

Yet research commissioned by the Benedict Blythe Foundation, which the family set up in their son’s name, revealed that one in three schools did not have an allergy policy and almost half did not hold spare life-saving medication.

“As a family, leading the campaign for allergy safety in schools has been about remembering our son,” Helen and Peter continued.

“He was a kind, clever boy who cared about helping others – so knowing that for the first time schools will be expected to protect children with allergies like him from harm feels like a fitting legacy for Benedict.”

The Benedict Blythe Foundation caveated that while guidance sets expectations, it does not create an enforceable legal duty or guarantee consistent implementation across every school.

Olivia Bailey, minister for Early Education, said: “No parent should have to send their child to school worried that a life-threatening allergic reaction won’t be handled swiftly.

“We have listened to the families and organisations who have campaigned tirelessly on this issue, and we are acting.

“These new requirements will give parents the confidence that every school has the training, the plans and the equipment in place to keep their child safe.”

Tanya Ednan-Laperouse OBE, whose daughter Natasha died aged 15 from an allergic reaction, said she is “deeply grateful” that the government is taking action to keep children with food allergies safe at school.

UK’s Health Agency Warns Children Hospitalised Amid London Measles Outbreak

Posted on 19/02/2026 by Boris Clair

Measles cases continue to rise in London, largely driven by an outbreak of the illness among children in Enfield.

There have been 50 confirmed cases of measles in the borough up to 16 February, according to the UK Health Security Agency (UKHSA). However, experts have said it’s likely the actual number of cases will be higher.

The outbreak is mostly affecting unvaccinated children under the age of 10, in both schools and nurseries.

According to a GP surgery in Enfield, one in five children with measles have been hospitalised as a result of this latest outbreak, and all of those hospitalised have not been fully immunised.

For a number of years, the borough has struggled with low uptake of the measles, mumps and rubella (MMR) vaccine – which children can have two doses of in early childhood as part of NHS immunisations – due to online misinformation, health equalities and general vaccine hesitancy, the Guardian reported.

On 19 Feb, Dr Vanessa Saliba, consultant epidemiologist at UKHSA, confirmed the outbreak has led to some children ending up in hospital.

The possible long-term health complications from catching measles can include: hearing loss, blindness, pneumonia (infected inflammation of the lungs), encephalitis (inflammation and swelling of the brain) and brain damage. In some cases, it can prove fatal.

“Measles is a nasty illness for any child, but for some it can lead to serious long term complications and tragically death, but is so easily preventable with two doses of the MMRV vaccine [the MMR vaccine also now includes protection against varicella, or chickenpox],” Dr Saliba said.

“All parents want what is best for their child – if they have missed any of their doses or you’re unsure, get in touch with your GP surgery. It’s never too late to catch up.

“The MMRV vaccine will give them the vital protection they need against this highly contagious disease, and also help protect more vulnerable children around them who are too young or unable to have the vaccine due a weakened immune system.”

Symptoms of measles

Measles typically starts off like a cold with a high temperature, runny nose, sneezing, cough and red, sore, watery eyes.

Some people might also experience Koplik spots, which show up as white spots inside the mouth on the inner lining of the cheek and lips – this can help distinguish it from a common cold.

The distinctive body rash can show up a number of days later. This is the “most typical symptom of measles, which usually starts on the face and spreads to the rest of the body”, Superdrug’s pharmacy superintendent Niamh McMillan previously told HuffPost UK.

“It usually appears three to five days after first signs of symptoms and lasts for several days. The rash can be flat or slightly raised and join together into larger patches.”

According to the NHS, the rash can look brown or red on white skin and may be harder to see on brown and black skin.

If you suspect your child has measles, the NHS advises to call for an urgent GP appointment or to speak to NHS 111. It’s important to call your GP surgery before you go in as measles is very contagious.

‘No Platform Gets A Free Pass’: Government Plans New Crackdown On AI Chatbots And Social Media

Posted on 15/02/2026 by Boris Clair

The government is set to announce new plans to crack down on online platforms in a bid to keep children safe.

Shortly after Labour successfully pushed X to limit AI bot Grok’s powers to post non-consensual, intimate images of people, prime minister Keir Starmer on Monday will unveil his strategy to help younger generations navigate the internet.

The government plans to shut a legal loophole and force all AI chatbot providers to abide by illegal content duties in the Online Safety Act, or risk breaking the law, with an amendment to the Crime and Policing Bill.

Ministers will also be able to implement changes to legislation on social media quickly with new powers in the Children’s Wellbeing and Schools Bill, if supported by MPs.

That could include setting a minimum age limit for social media and restricting features like infinite scrolling.

Any such changes to the law will be based on the outcomes in the government’s digital wellbeing consultation, which will launch in March, with parents, young people and civil society groups.

Ministers will consult on how best to ensure tech companies can safeguard children from sending or receiving nude images, and confront the full range of risks they might face online.

The government will also look at how to preserve vital data online if linked to a child’s death.

Starmer pledged: “Technology is moving really fast, and the law has got to keep up. With my government, Britain will be a leader not a follower when it comes to online safety.

“The action we took on Grok sent a clear message that no platform gets a free pass.

“Today we are closing loopholes that put children at risk, and laying the groundwork for further action.

“We are acting to protect children’s wellbeing and help parents to navigate the minefield of social media.”

Technology secretary Liz Kendall said: “We will not wait to take the action families need, so we will tighten the rules on AI chatbots and we are laying the ground so we can act at pace on the results of the consultation on young people and social media.

“We are determined to give children the childhood they deserve and to prepare them for the future at time of rapid technological change.”

The Department for Science, Innovation and Technology has launched the “You Won’t Know Until You Ask” campaign, too.

This will offer practical guidance on safety settings and conversation prompts to use with children to discuss the subject matter.

Tory shadow education secretary Laura Trott described the announcement as “more smoke and mirrors from a government that has chosen inaction when it comes to stopping under-16s accessing social media”.

“Claiming they are taking ‘immediate action’ is simply not credible when their so-called urgent consultation does not even exist,” Trott said.

“Labour have repeatedly said they do not have a view on whether under-16s should be prevented from accessing social media. That is not good enough. I am clear that we should stop under-16s accessing these platforms.

“The evidence of harm is clear and parents, teachers and children themselves have made their voices heard. Britain is lagging behind while other countries have recognised the risks and begun to act.”

She added: “Dressing this up as progress while refusing to grasp the central issue risks becoming a Trojan horse for further delay.”

The Lib Dems’ spokesperson for education Munira Wilson said this was proof the government was still “kicking the can down the road”.

She said: “There is no time to waste, but the government continues to kick the can down the road. We need a much clearer, firm timeline for when they will take action.

“Parliament deserves a real say and the chance to properly scrutinise the Government’s plans. Instead, the prime minister is desperate to buy himself time with his MPs with an approach that will limit oversight now and in the future.

“Time for a concrete plan by working with us on future-proof protections.”

Move Over ‘Six-Seven’. Kids Are Saying ‘Lowkenuinely’ Now

Posted on 14/02/2026 by Boris Clair

If there’s one thing we know about Gen Alpha, it’s that they low-key delight in coining a new word (or five) and the odd nonsensical phrase.

Take six-seven for example. It became a global phenomenon in 2025 thanks to social media, but it didn’t ever really mean anything. Or, at least, nobody could agree on a meaning.

Some said it meant “so-so” (as kids used it with an up-and-down hand motion), others thought it meant a tall person, or a basketball term.

In the end it just became a response that kids made at every opportunity – especially if someone (a teacher, parent, classmate) happened to mention those two numbers in a different context.

A teacher could say “turn to page 67 in your books”, for example, and the classroom would erupt into “six-sevennnnnn”.

This disruption ultimately led to the phrase being banned in some classrooms.

Thankfully the bizarre phrase seems to have fizzled out, but teachers and parents are noticing that “lowkenuinely” has entered the chat instead.

What does lowkenuinely mean?

Lowkenuinely is a combination of ‘lowkey’ and ‘genuinely’, which describes expressing something sincere in a casual, laid-back way, according to experts at language platform Preply.

Essentially, it is a TikTok-era way of saying something is real or heartfelt. So, an example might be: “I lowkenuinely love this song” or “I’m lowkenuinely not going to make it through this exam”.

Kids of the internet clearly love a portmanteau (that is, blending two words together to create a new one).

Choppelganger is another recent creation hot off their keyboards, combining ‘chopped’, typically used by teens to describe someone as ugly; and ‘doppelganger’, which is a person who resembles someone else.

A choppelganger, then, is an uglier version of a doppelganger. One parent noted their kids had referred to them as “Uncle Fester’s Choppelganger”. Harsh.

There’s also been chat, clock it and glazing, as well as aura farming and crash out. Honestly, they’ve been busy.

‘Inheritourism’ Explains Why People Travel The Way They Do

Posted on 07/02/2026 by Boris Clair

“Land snorkelling.”

“Sleepcations.”

“Noctourism.”

There’s a seemingly endless array of quippy terms to describe rising travel trends and preferences.

One particularly interesting term is “inheritourism”, which really gets to the heart of why different individuals travel the way that they do and how family plays a role.

Below, travel experts break down the meaning of “inheritourism”, as well as the benefits and drawbacks of this holiday phenomenon.

What is ‘inheritourism’?

“Inheritourism reflects how travel preferences are passed down across generations,” said Jess Petitt, senior vice president or strategy, insights and full service brands at Hilton.

“Many people inherit travel preferences from their parents, with family experiences often shaping how people travel well into adulthood.”

A 2026 travel report from Hilton identified “inheritourism” as a notable trend for the new year – with 66% of travellers surveyed by the hotel brand saying that their parents have influenced their choice of accommodations, 60% saying they guided their choice of loyalty programs and 73% saying they shaped their general travel style.

“I think inheritourism shows up most clearly in how people define what ‘comfortable’ travel looks like,” said travel blogger Esther Susag. “Many travellers inherit not just destinations, but entire travel styles from their parents. For example, I often notice that people who grew up only doing cruises or all-inclusive resorts tend to gravitate back to those formats as adults.”

Travellers accustomed to the ease of having everything in one place might be more hesitant to go off the beaten path with independent accommodations, hidden gem destinations or locations that require more planning or cultural navigation.

“That same pattern extends into how people pay for travel,” Susag said. “I’ve noticed that travellers whose parents used travel credit cards and understood points and miles tend to feel much more comfortable navigating loyalty programs and booking elevated experiences. On the other hand, people who grew up saving for years for one big trip and paying mostly in cash or with a single credit card often carry that same cautious mindset forward and are hesitant to open multiple cards or experiment with points strategies.”

She added that many parents remain deeply involved in their adult children’s travel decisions, often financing trips with their own loyalty points or preferred brands. Multigenerational travel is increasingly popular, thus exposing new generations to the same kinds of choices.

“Over time, that becomes their baseline for what travel ‘should’ look like,” Susag said. “As travel has become more expensive and more intentional, people are less willing to experiment and more likely to stick with what they know works. That often means repeating the travel patterns they grew up with, whether that’s specific destinations, hotel brands or trip formats.”

It’s only natural that people who grew up vacationing in a certain way as children would adopt similar travel behaviors as adults.

It’s only natural that people who grew up travelling in a certain way as children would adopt similar preferences. Katy Nastro, a spokesperson and travel expert for the flight alert service Going, pointed to the cliché “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree”.

“I personally grew up going to warm beach destinations to escape the New York winter every February,” Nastro said. “I wholeheartedly believe that the desire for a warmer weather destination during the month of February versus a cold weather trip is not just a preference but is now a personality trait inherited from my family travels as a child.”

She believes the same pattern is evident in the families attracted to “the magic of Disney” with Disney theme parks vacations over multiple generations. Our early memories can inform what we find meaningful and rewarding as we grow up.

“My family chooses the mountains over the beach always, because it’s where I grew up vacationing – and if you ask me, it’s just better,” Petitt said. “Those experiences are also what I’m excited to share with my kids, building on those memories. If we never visit a beach as a family, that would be OK by me.”

Family travel habits strongly influence people’s choices – but is that a good thing?

“Any travel is beneficial in my opinion,” Nastro said. “And in theory, inheritourism can create generational travel because people are inclined to continue the tradition of travel to a certain place, hotel, etc. The only downside may be that this perpetuates a blinder affect where people don’t tend to branch away from what they know, and thus never really explore beyond their comfort zone.”

She added that inheritourism might lead people to miss out on good deals if they can’t look beyond the specific brands or locations they’ve “inherited”.

“Travellers may avoid less popular destinations or more immersive experiences because they feel less predictable or convenient,” Susag said. “That said, awareness is growing, and many people are starting to challenge those habits once they realise there are other ways to travel that still feel safe and rewarding.”

Overall, she sees a mix of downsides and benefits to the influence of inheritourism today.

“On the positive side, inheritourism makes travel more accessible and lowers the barrier to entry for a lot of people,” Susag said. “It also encourages multigenerational travel and shared experiences, which can be incredibly meaningful.”

Inheritourism can serve as “a foundation, rather than a fixed path,” she emphasised. Travellers can carry forward meaningful traditions but also cultivate their own.

“People tend to start by recreating the trips and habits they grew up with, then adapt them as their confidence grows and their priorities shift,” Susag said. “Whether that means exploring less traditional destinations, traveling more independently or becoming more intentional about how they spend on travel, many travellers eventually build on what they inherited rather than abandoning it altogether.”

As in other areas of life, parents tend to set the norms and serve as trusted sources for young adults as they make decisions.

“In a world of digital overwhelm and an abundance of choice, travellers are looking to their inner circle to inform their travel decisions,” Petitt said.

“When seeking an experience beyond what is familiar, inherited preferences and trusted travel habits serve as a starting point for discovering something new. The key is balance – while inheritourism offers comfort and confidence, the greatest benefit comes when those familiar influences open the door to exploration, rather than limit it.”

‘I Was An Estranged Child. Here’s What I Wish Parents Knew About Going No-Contact’

Posted on 21/01/2026 by Boris Clair

Estrangement, and especially the estrangement of adult children from their parents, has been a big topic in the past few months.

Oprah Winfrey invited a panel of therapists to talk about the “rising trend” of estrangement on her podcast, for instance. One of the experts controversially blamed “therapy” for “inflammatory reactions” to parents’ behaviour.

And Sir David and Victoria Beckham’s relationship with their son Brooklyn has proven, well, rocky in the past year, too.

We don’t know the particulars of that case for sure.

But with so much attention around the topic of estrangement, we spoke to Dorcy Pruter, the founder of the Conscious Co-Parenting Institute, who began her business after reconnecting with her father following years of estrangement.

Here, she shared “the hard truth most [estranged] parents aren’t ready to hear (at least not at first)”.

“Going no-contact is never the first choice”

Some parents may feel blindsided by their grown-up child going no-contact.

But “going no-contact is never the first choice,” Pruter said. “It’s the last resort of a child who didn’t feel safe, seen, or sovereign in the relationship.”

She added that there is often no single moment that leads to a break.

Instead, “it begins with small moments of emotional misattunement. Dismissed feelings. Subtle control. A child becomes the parents’ emotional regulator.

“It can look like ‘loving too much’ or ‘doing everything for them,’ when in reality, the parent may have unknowingly made their child responsible for their self-worth.”

For the parent, she said, they might really feel they gave their child everything.

“So when a parent finds themselves mystified by estrangement, the most powerful question they can ask is not ‘What went wrong?’ but: ‘What truth did my child not feel safe enough to tell me?’

“Is it helpful to reflect? Yes, but only if the reflection is rooted in curiosity, not guilt or blame. Parents must be willing to trade the need to be ‘right’ for the courage to reconnect. That means listening to the silence not as a punishment, but as a message.”

How can I tell if my grown-up child is distancing themselves from me, and what can I do if they go no-contact?

Another reason parents might feel shocked by their child’s distance, Pruter told us, is that they struggle to notice early signs of disconnection for what it really is.

“There are often early signs of withdrawal, short or transactional conversations, and emotional distance, but many parents miss them because they interpret that distance as rudeness or ingratitude, rather than disconnection,” she said.

And if your child has already gone no-contact, she recommended taking that as an opportunity to “heal [your] own wounds, take radical responsibility, and become safe for their child again, even if that child never returns.

“I often tell my clients that reconnection isn’t about changing your child’s mind. It’s about transforming your own heart.”

Parents And Experts Tackle The Tricky Topic Of Banning Under-16s From Using Social Media

Posted on 20/01/2026 by Boris Clair

After Australia made moves to ban under-16s from using social media, both the UK and France are considering a similar move.

The UK government has now launched a consultation on children’s use of technology, including social media, and said it’s seeking views from parents, young people and civil society – with a response expected this summer.

Over the weekend, more than 60 Labour MPs wrote to prime minister Keir Starmer urging him to back a ban, while members of the House of Lords are set to vote on a cross-party amendment to the Children’s Wellbeing and Schools Bill this week to raise the age of social media access to 16.

Esther Ghey, the mum of Brianna Ghey who was murdered by two teenagers, has lent her support to the amendment, saying it is a “vital step in better protecting children online”.

What do parents and experts think of a social media ban for young people?

In December 2025, a YouGov poll of 5,000 people found 39% of respondents “strongly supported” and 35% “somewhat supported” a ban on under-16s having social media accounts. In contrast, just 15% “somewhat opposed” and 4% “strongly opposed” it.

A separate survey by The Good Growth Foundation found 66% of respondents backed a social media ban for young people, while a petition calling for a ban on social media access for under-16s has been circulating in parent Whatsapp groups – at the time of writing, it had 65,000 signatures.

Dr Tracy King, is a chartered clinical psychologist who has a 13-year-old autistic daughter. She told HuffPost UK that from a parental and professional perspective, she supports stronger regulation and safeguards, but she is cautious of an outright ban.

“Social media can expose teenagers to real risks, including comparison culture, grooming, algorithm-driven distress, and constant nervous system activation,” she said.

“I see this particularly affecting neurodivergent young people, who may be more vulnerable to social overwhelm, rejection sensitivity, and online manipulation.

“At the same time, for many autistic teenagers, social media can provide connection, identity exploration, and a sense of belonging that is harder to access offline.”

The psychologist suggested a blanket ban risks “removing one of the few spaces where some young people feel socially competent or understood, without addressing the underlying issues of platform design, moderation, and digital literacy”.

What she wants most is not just restriction, but protection paired with education and realistic, age-appropriate boundaries. “That education has to extend to parents, as I see many who have no idea of online risks happening behind the bedroom door,” she added.

Lucy Whitehouse, who has a three-year-old and is CEO of sex education charity Fumble, noted that pressure should be put on social media platforms to “clean up their act”, rather than banning young people.

“Social media has a lot of negative content, but it is also the place that young people go to in lieu of any inclusive and accessible sex education at school to find answers to the questions that they have and to connect and to learn,” she added.

One month after the ban in Australia took effect there was mixed reaction from teens, according to CNBC – while some expressed relief at being free of the distraction, others admitted to finding ways to circumvent the ban.

Lee Chambers, founder of Male Allies who has three children aged 13, 11 and two, believes this would happen in the UK too: “If you ban social media, young people will find another way in.”

He also noted that it’s hard to know where a line is drawn in terms of what constitutes ‘social media’.

“Roblox is a social platform where a lot of negative content is being shared. Will the government ban this, too? What about Whatspp? When does the banning stop?” he asked.

“What we need to do is to put real regulation and rules around these platforms that the social media giants must adhere to.”

He added that young people need help navigating the online world – “it’s not something that we can just switch off, it’s everywhere, and with AI things are only going to get worse”.

The government is said to also be looking at options including implementing phone curfews to avoid excessive use and restricting potentially addictive design features such as ‘streaks’ and ‘infinite scrolling’.

Technology Secretary Liz Kendall said: “Through the Online Safety Act, this government has already taken clear, concrete steps to deliver a safer online world for our children and young people.

“These laws were never meant to be the end point, and we know parents still have serious concerns. That is why I am prepared to take further action.”

Since the Online Safety Act came into play, children encountering age checks online has risen from 30% to 47% – and 58% of parents believe the measures are already improving children’s safety online.

Nova Eden, who has three children aged 14, 11 and six, and is one of the leading voices in the Smartphone Free Childhood campaign, added: “The harm being caused to young children is a public health emergency.

“There is an urgent need for UK leaders to step up and implement meaningful, accelerated change for the next generation. It is time to prioritise children’s mental health and wellbeing over the profits of Big Tech.”

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