Category Archives: LIFESTYLE

How to Overcome Your Feelings of Neediness

Posted on by

Why do you feel needy sometimes?

You feel needy because your own brain doesn’t believe you.

Your brain sees what you want. It also sees what you don’t want. And it genuinely expects that you’re going to keep getting what you don’t want. It doesn’t believe that you’re going to get what you want.

Your brain believes that your efforts to get what you want will ultimately provide inadequate. It believes that you’re going to fail.

So you feel needy when this happens. That’s actually a good signal, but you have to interpret – and act on it – correctly.

You can solve the problem of neediness today. You absolutely don’t have to wallow there.

Your brain is just being honest with you. That isn’t a problem per se. It’s just honest feedback, so take it as such. When you feel needy, accept that your brain is telling you that your current plans, behaviors, and actions aren’t going to work. They’re too weak or too misguided to succeed.

Despite this feedback coming from your own brain, don’t take it personally. This doesn’t mean that you’re weak. This doesn’t mean that you aren’t good enough as a human being. But it does mean that your current approach sucks and that you’re going to have to change it.

From Neediness to Abundance

In any area of life where you feel needy, ask yourself this key question:

What would it take to objectively create measurable and observable abundance in this particular area, so it would be really difficult to feel any further neediness?

Also ask:

What would it take to solve the neediness problem for life, permanently?

If you need sales in business, and customers are flooding you with purchases, it’s pretty hard to feel needy for more sales. So one priority in business is to get really good at generating sales consistently, so there’s no longer any neediness in that area.

If you need toilet paper and buy some at Costco, you’re likely to feel pretty secure about having more than enough for a while. When that sort of neediness is no longer present, you can focus on other parts of life.

Show your brain a true solution, and it will very likely stop generating feelings of neediness – if it also believes that you’re really going to implement that solution.

So to overcome neediness, you must show your brain the following:

  1. A practical solution that looks solid and workable, even if it may take a long time
  2. True evidence that you’re seriously committed to actually solving the neediness problem, even if your initial plan doesn’t work

If you could only pick one, the second item is more important than the first. While a plan can be good and convincing, what matters more for overcoming neediness is the personal commitment to create and experience abundance in that area of life. You have to convince your own brain that you’re absolutely going for the gold and that you’ll never give up.

If you convince your brain that you’re going to give up at some point, you can expect to feel pretty damned needy.

Recognize that replacing neediness with abundance is a long-term problem that deserves a thoughtful, long-term solution. Otherwise it will probably still be in your life decade after decade. Whatever neediness you’re dealing with in your 20s will still be haunting you in your 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, and beyond. Problems of neediness usually don’t just go away. You will drag them forward year after year. Your brain knows this, and it’s trying to warn you NOT to do this.

It’s wise to see just how nasty long-term neediness can be, so you’ll frame the stakes as worthy of a long-term commitment to create a real solution, even if it requires a five-year investment or longer.

Solve the Problem for Life

Just reaching the point of making a real decision regarding your level of commitment to REALLY solve the problem for life is transformational. That alone is usually enough to significantly reduce or eliminate the neediness.

Consider this: What really makes you feel needy is that you aren’t committed to doing WHATEVER IT TAKES to create abundance in that particular area.

Your brain knows when you aren’t committed. And it can predict long-term failure and lack when there’s no clear evidence that you’re actually going to do what’s necessary to solve the problem once and for all. So it’s going to generate some negative feelings to communicate that you don’t have a real solution yet.

Your brain is doing you a great service here. It’s trying to grab your attention, so you’ll prioritize solving this problem and prevent a lifetime of regret.

As soon as you truly make a firm and solid commitment to a new course of action that has a decent chance of long-term success, your brain can finally be satisfied that you’ll eventually get there. It can start predicting success, and so it will very likely start generating some positive emotions. You won’t feel neediness anymore. Instead you’ll feel confident, motivated, excited, curious, and other empowering emotions.

Stop disappointing your own brain with your egregious lack of commitment. Your brain isn’t fooled by your half-assed efforts. It can see plain as day that you’re going to fall short.

What About Intentions?

Are mere intentions enough? Ask your brain. It will tell you when it believes that you’re doing enough and when you’re just practicing wishful thinking and deluding yourself.

If your goal is basic enough that just holding some positive intentions will create abundance, you’ll feel great just holding those intentions. Maybe your brain has seen enough evidence that this approach works for you, and it can predict success when you apply it under certain conditions.

But if your brain isn’t convinced, you can hold those cutesy intentions all you want, and much of the time you’ll still feel anxious, worried, and needy because your brain doesn’t believe that the power of intention alone will be enough.

How will you convince the universe to give you what you want if you can’t even convince your own brain?

When your own brain demands more from you, give it more.

Remember that when you feel needy, your brain is saying: I don’t believe you.

Whatever It Takes

So what can you do today, right now, to overcome feelings of neediness and replace them with certainty and confidence?

Do WHATEVER IT TAKES to create the EVIDENCE that you are 100% committed to solving this particular problem for life. Convince your own brain that you’re serious.

One of the greatest transformations I see in my readers who change their lives for the better is when they finally decide to get SERIOUS about solving a problem that’s been plaguing them for a long time.

Some frame it as: no more playing small. It’s like graduating to a new level of maturity.

Instead of resisting the bigger effort required for success, you can accept the invitation.

Say to yourself something like this:

Okay, so my previous efforts have been wholly inadequate. If I keep doing what I’m doing, maybe I’ll get some incremental gains here and there. Maybe I’ll get lucky. But I’ll never get to experience anything close to the level of success I’d really like in this area of life. And if I don’t do something about this right now to change course, I’ll be dealing with this same crap year after year for the rest of my life. It’s just not going to get much better than it already is, and it may even get worse. The only way to succeed is to up my game. I can’t keep playing this the way I’ve been playing it – that is just never going to work.

You can even dialogue with your brain through journaling. Converse with it to see what it actually needs to see from you in order to stop generating feelings of neediness. Listen for the truth, not for the feel-good answer you’re hoping for.

Through practice and observation, you’ll learn what it takes to convince your brain that you’re going to succeed, and you’ll recognize when it doesn’t believe you.

I can tell by how I feel that I’ve convinced my brain that I’m going to write a novel in November (or at least the first 50K words of it). I feel certain and confident that I’ll actually do it. That’s because I’m all-in committed. Other people can see evidence of this too, like my blog posts about this commitment, my NaNoWriMo profile with the book project already created, social media updates about it, recent books I’ve been reading about writing, research I’ve done on story structure, etc. The external evidence may help to convince other people that I’m serious about this, but what really matters internally is that I’ve convinced my own brain that I’m all-in and that I will actually do this. I’ve done enough for my brain to signal loud and clear that it believes me.

Where in your life do you want certainty, confidence, and abundance? Start by convincing your brain that you’re 100% all-in committed to reaching a certain level of abundance and moving beyond scarcity. You can do this in any area of life: money, relationships, professional achievement, creative self-expression, lifestyle, and more.

What will it take for your brain to believe that you’re absolutely going to do enough to succeed?

If you don’t know, then ask your brain what it needs to see in order to be fully convinced. The answers may be simpler than you expect, like: join NaNoWriMo, join the local NaNoWriMo group, buy a half dozen audiobooks on writing and start listening to them, share the commitment publicly, invite others to join in, research story structure, create a novel project in Scrivener, start brainstorming story ideas, etc. Even before doing all of those items, my brain grew convinced when it saw sufficient evidence that I was going to do them and not stop – and that’s before I’ve written a single word of the actual novel.

Beyond Your Comfort Zone

You can’t fool your own brain. It sees right through you. If you feel needy, that’s your brain telling you LOUD and CLEAR that it doesn’t believe you and that it doubts your sincerity. It’s predicting that you’re going to fail because it’s not seeing enough evidence of any real and true commitment. So it’s calling your plans and intentions out as B.S. that won’t work.

That is a call to change – to immediately and powerfully alter course. That can be done in a day. It’s a decision – not a needy one but a strong one that proves to your brain that you’re making a commitment and that you absolutely won’t quit till the job is done.

Convince your brain that you’ll do whatever it takes to succeed. If you haven’t done that yet, then your “whatever it takes” is going to require that you stretch beyond your comfort zone. Don’t confuse “whatever it takes” with “whatever feels comfortable.”

Be willing to do what feels awkward, uncomfortable, and scary. That’s all part of doing whatever it takes.

If awkwardness is enough to stop you, you’ve lost. If discomfort is enough to stop you, you’ve lost. If fear is enough to stop you, you’ve lost.

Your path to abundance may very well take you through awkward, uncomfortable, and scary experiences. Be willing to experience all of that. Surrender to that possibility. Make it clear to your brain that you won’t use those as excuses to quit. Then create some real evidence by deliberately doing something awkward, uncomfortable, or scary. Prove that you’re serious.

Alternatively, you can continue to wallow in neediness – month after month, year after year, decade after decade – until you don’t even cling to false hope anymore, and your neediness is replaced by permanent regret.

Note finally that neediness is actually a positive sign. If you feel needy, it means that your brain still believes you can succeed, but only if you change your approach, raise your commitment, and finally get serious.

Neediness is an invitation; don’t leave it unanswered.

Share Button

Nigella Lawson Doesn’t ‘Take For Granted’ That She’s Still Alive At 60

Posted on by
Reply

HuffPost is part of Verizon Media. We and our partners will store and/or access information on your device through the use of cookies and similar technologies, to display personalised ads and content, for ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development.

Your personal data that may be used

  • Information about your device and internet connection, including your IP address
  • Browsing and search activity while using Verizon Media websites and apps
  • Precise location

Find out more about how we use your information in our Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy.

To enable Verizon Media and our partners to process your personal data select ‘I agree‘, or select ‘Manage settings‘ for more information and to manage your choices. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Your Privacy Controls.

Share Button

For the Experience

Posted on by

One framing that I find empowering is to do something for the experience.

If you choose not to do something, you don’t get the experience, which means you miss out on a lot of potential benefits.

When you lean into new experiences, you’re likely to gain some or all the following:

  • New lessons
  • More character growth
  • Perspective shifts and reframes
  • Insights
  • New friends
  • Maybe a whole new social circle
  • New income-generating ideas
  • New invitations
  • New opportunities
  • New memories
  • More knowledge
  • New skills
  • More emotional depth
  • More emotional resilience
  • A more optimistic attitude
  • More excitement and passion
  • Less boredom
  • A sharper, fitter, less fragile brain

New experiences make you smarter and enrich your life in so many ways. Even a relatively short one-time experience like going to a lecture or a concert can change the direction of your life or give you a strong memory you’ll cherish for decades.

Sometimes you’re choosing between one interesting experience and another, but more often it’s a choice between something new and something familiar.

New experiences are uncertain though. They can seem scary, even when they aren’t truly threatening. It’s actually good and healthy for you to be knocked off balance now and then – it makes you stronger.

When you don’t lean into new experiences, you miss out on the wonderful romance that awaits you.

How fragile do you want to be as a human being? How crusty and set in your ways do you wish to become as you age? Do you want each day to be the same – safe and cocooned till death finally comes for you?

Are you living with that feeling of pep in your step? Do you feel excited for what you get to learn and experience each day? Or has your life become an endless barrage of sameness?

Don’t blame the virus for the sameness. There’s still plenty to explore right now without risking your health or the health of others. You can access a treasure chest of new experiences from your home.

Beware the trap of courting the same old familiar experiences. Stretch your ambition in the direction of some bigger ones now and then. Reach further into the possibility space.

This time is a gift. You could remake your identity during this time. You could develop new skills that you’ll cherish for the rest of your life. You could undertake the biggest creative project of your life – something that stretches beyond your current abilities.

Do it for the experience.

Share Button

The Point of No Return

Posted on by

In Act 1 of a story with a 3-act structure, the protagonist often reaches the point of no return. Their old world crumbles, and they stumble forward into a new world, often reactively at first. There is no going back to the old world.

In a novel or movie, there may be multiple progressive points of no return, each creating a deeper level of commitment and increasing the protagonist’s risk as well.

Once Neo takes the red pill in The Matrix, he can’t go back to his old life. The old reality has ended, and now his world is permanently changed.

Once Harry Potter learns that he’s a wizard, his world is never be the same again. He must continue on to Hogwarts. Even when he goes home afterwards, it’s not longer the old status quo.

When it comes to personal transformations, we can make progress faster by deliberately aligning ourselves with certain plot beats that are guaranteed to advance the story. One of those beats is the classic point of no return.

Many people get their stories stuck in Act 1 because they just think about the end goal – if they even have a clear one at all – and they never reach a point of no return that moves their story forward.

When you keep your options open and allow yourself to retain access to your Act 1 world, you remain stuck in Act 1. That’s what Act 1 characters do. They resist the call to adventure, to risk, and to change. They are not committed to change, so real change doesn’t occur.

Are you currently living as an Act 1 character in your story?

Suppose someone wants a more independent lifestyle, but they keep showing up to work at a job they dislike. That’s Act 1. We’re seeing the initial status quo. To advance the story, something must perturb and eventually destroy that status quo. A catalyst is needed.

Are you waiting for a catalyst to magically appear in order to progress your story? Are you waiting for Hagrid or Trinity to show up? Are you waiting for your cell phone to cough up a hologram of Princess Leia? These types of events happen in movies, but in real life you may end up waiting a very long time, perhaps years or even decades.

Are you waiting passively for a catalyst, or are you actively looking for one? Better yet, when you need a catalyst, you can create your own. Why wait?

If you want to advance your story, a good first step is to focus on graduating from Act 1, so you can progress to Act 2. Work on reaching your point of no return. Your old world must die, and you must come to accept the obviousness of that. As long as you still think you can keep your old world humming along safely, you’re still thinking like an Act 1 character, and you aren’t ready for Act 2.

In your personal Act 1, realize that your dead-end job, your dead-end relationship, or your dead-end health habits must come to an end. You cannot keep living in Act 1 unless you want your life story to remain perpetually stuck.

With any powerful personal goal, focus first on raising your commitment level. Make it inevitable that you’ll at least get moving in that direction. A good place to begin is to accept that your old world must collapse. You’re going to have to leave it behind.

In order to do this, you must lean your character towards growth, mystery, and risk. Yes, that will probably seem scary at first. Acts 2 and 3 are way more risky and dangerous than Act 1. Act 1 is cozy and safe – and also boring if it goes on too long.

In a typical 100-minute movie, Act 1 is around 25 minutes – just the first 25%. If you remain stuck in Act 1, you’re leaving most of the value of your life untapped and unlived.

This takes courage of course. What also helps is knowing how awful it will be if you grow old and die while your character is still in Act 1 of your story. If you really want to live, you’ll go through multiple story arcs during your lifetime, and these story arcs can overlap. So sometimes you’ll be in Act 1 of one part of your story while you’re in Act 3 of another.

Do you already have regrets about how much time you’ve spent stuck in Act 1? If so, work on progressing to Act 2 by creating the death of your old world. Engineer your own point of no return, where change becomes inevitable. Demand more courage from yourself. Don’t wait for a catalyst to appear. Reading this can be enough of a catalyst if you want it to be. You’re fully capable of making a real decision to change. That starts with realizing that you’re finally done with Act 1.

One of my personal story arcs that spanned many years was a progression from financial scarcity to abundance. My transition from Act 1 to Act 2 happened in 1999. The decision wasn’t the surface idea to stop being broke financially. It was a decision to stop pretending that financial scarcity could stop me from having a fun, happy, and rewarding life. I resolved to stop stressing over money and to start having way more fun in life. I stopped giving my power away to some number in a computer database. That was the real decision that progressed me to Act 2. It was a decision to change how I related to life and money.

The point of no return is really a decision. It’s when you decide to progress your story, and you also decide that there’s no going back. The dead-end job is done. The dead-end relationship is over. The dead-end health habits are finished. The dead-end relationship with money must die.

Other people will see your outer journey, but these decisions have more to do with your inner journey. You don’t just decide to leave your job for surface reasons. You decide that you’re no longer going to be the timid and needy person who will show up for a job that isn’t right for you. You’re not going to keep being the coward who will continue taking orders from a misguided boss. You’re not going to be the drone who works for a company for misaligned values. It’s time to construct a new identity that fits who you’ve ready to become.

A real decision is harder than action. A real decision progresses you into Act 2 of your story. You’ll know when you’ve made the decision because you’ll feel this deep acceptance – and often even some sorrow – that Act 1 is finally over and done with.

Don’t wait for an external catalyst to get your story moving forward. Invite or create whatever catalyst you need to progress your story. Don’t keep living as an Act 1 character when you’re ready for Act 2.

Share Button

Four Symptoms GPs Want People To Get Checked Immediately

Posted on by
Reply

HuffPost is part of Verizon Media. We and our partners will store and/or access information on your device through the use of cookies and similar technologies, to display personalised ads and content, for ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development.

Your personal data that may be used

  • Information about your device and internet connection, including your IP address
  • Browsing and search activity while using Verizon Media websites and apps
  • Precise location

Find out more about how we use your information in our Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy.

To enable Verizon Media and our partners to process your personal data select ‘I agree‘, or select ‘Manage settings‘ for more information and to manage your choices. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Your Privacy Controls.

Share Button

Prince William Got Trolled By KFC And It’s Finger-Lickin’ Funny

Posted on by
Reply

HuffPost is part of Verizon Media. We and our partners will store and/or access information on your device through the use of cookies and similar technologies, to display personalised ads and content, for ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development.

Your personal data that may be used

  • Information about your device and internet connection, including your IP address
  • Browsing and search activity while using Verizon Media websites and apps
  • Precise location

Find out more about how we use your information in our Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy.

To enable Verizon Media and our partners to process your personal data select ‘I agree‘, or select ‘Manage settings‘ for more information and to manage your choices. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Your Privacy Controls.

Share Button

‘No Privacy’: Why Blind Women Really Need Accessible Pregnancy Tests

Posted on by
Reply

HuffPost is part of Verizon Media. We and our partners will store and/or access information on your device through the use of cookies and similar technologies, to display personalised ads and content, for ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development.

Your personal data that may be used

  • Information about your device and internet connection, including your IP address
  • Browsing and search activity while using Verizon Media websites and apps
  • Precise location

Find out more about how we use your information in our Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy.

To enable Verizon Media and our partners to process your personal data select ‘I agree‘, or select ‘Manage settings‘ for more information and to manage your choices. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Your Privacy Controls.

Share Button

NaNoWriMo 2020

Posted on by

As I’ve shared previously, one of my goals for this year is to write a novel. I’ve never done that before. It’s been a stretch goal of mine for a long time, and I’ve decided the time has come to finally do it.

To move this goal forward in a more concrete way, I signed up for NaNoWriMo on Friday. NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month, and it happens every year in the month of November. I’ve been aware of it for years, but this is the first time I’ve ever signed up for it.

If you have a NaNoWriMo account, feel free to add me to your buddy list. Here’s my NaNoWriMo profile, but I think you’ll need to be logged in there to see it. My account is Steve Pavlina, so it should be easy to find me there.

NaNoWriMo is both an annual online event and a non-profit organization. It started in 1999 with 21 people, and now hundreds of thousands of people participate each year. It’s entirely Internet-based, so you can participate from home. It’s also free if you want it to be, although they encourage donations. If you made a donation, they add a halo to your profile pic – cute!

The purpose of NaNoWriMo is to help you write the first draft of a novel. The stated goal is to write at least 50,000 words of a novel during the month of November. That can be an ugly first draft, and you don’t even have to finish the whole book.

There’s a lot of social support in NaNoWriMo as well. This includes an active community forum, recorded pep talks, and lots more. In fact, right after I post this, I’m going to hop on a two-hour call from my local NaNoWriMo chapter, which is hosting an online event to help members get started.

Why Write a Novel?

I’m already a published author, so that part won’t be new to me. My book Personal Development for Smart People was published by Hay House in 2008. Since I uncopyrighted my blog posts in 2010 as well, many more books have been published under my name – at least 150 of them last time I counted.

I can say that it was special experience to walk into a bookstore and see my book on the shelf many years ago. That does feel awesome. But since I’ve already had that experience, this isn’t a significant part of my motivation for writing fiction.

My motivation for writing a novel isn’t about the book aspect but rather the fiction aspect. I’m really curious about what it will be like to create a work of fiction.

I’m especially motivated by exploration and growth, and I love a good challenge. It seems like this would be a wonderful way to explore writing from a fresh perspective.

I don’t already have a story in mind. I don’t even know what genre I’d pick yet. Rachelle says I should write a sci-fi book, and that does have some appeal, but right now I still feel very open to the possibility space. I feel more interested in co-creating a novel with reality, much like the attitude I use with blogging.

I’m used to writing from inspiration, and I know how to do that whenever I want. This works for shorter pieces like blog posts and videos, and it also works for creating extensive courses. Reality always has my back when it comes to opening the floodgates of inspired ideas to share.

Since I already have a wonderful creative relationship with reality on the nonfiction side, I want to see if I can stretch this relationship to include fiction as well. Will it be radically different if I have to think about characters and settings and plot?

I do feel confident that I could write the first draft of a novel with a pantser approach – just write from start to finish without pre-planning – but it might be pretty bad. Then again, maybe this approach is good enough for a first draft.

Writing 50K words in a month doesn’t seem daunting to me. It actually sounds like fun. If I squeeze myself to write a novel in a month, what will come out? I don’t know.

Will it be something cerebral? Personally meaningful? Humorous? Slutty? All of those? I can’t say. Nothing has been decided yet.

Since I’ve never written a novel before, the pantser approach does appeal to me, at least for the first time, if only because I haven’t learned a more structured approach yet. It might be nice just to see what comes out of me by writing from inspiration. Maybe that adds up to a sucky story that’s painful to read, but maybe it generates enough good ideas that I could edit it into something semi-decent.

Any interest in joining me? About six weeks from today, you and I could both have the first draft of a novel done. Wouldn’t that be nice?

Share Button

Curiosity Goals

Posted on by

Maybe you have some goals for accomplishments you’d like to experience and enjoy. That’s great. Just be aware that you can also set goals for outcomes and experiences that you don’t even know if you’ll like.

One of my current goals is to be able to walk 80 steps at a normal walking pace while comfortably holding my breath. That’s after exhaling and with only relaxed and shallow nose-breathing beforehand, not while holding in a deep breath. I started working on this goal last week, and currently I’m up to 25 steps.

What will I gain by achieving this goal? I don’t know. I’m simply curious what might be different when I’m able to do that. Maybe there will be some interesting side effects like better focus and concentration. I can’t actually predict what difference it will make. After reading The Oxygen Advantage, I have some ideas regarding potential benefits, but I won’t really know if there are any meaningful benefits till I experience them.

I’m not pursuing this goal for known and clear benefits. I’m exploring it for curiosity’s sake. I like giving myself new experiences to see how they affect me.

Same goes for blogging every day this year. That isn’t a goal with clear and obvious benefits. I’d like to know what it’s like to blog every day for a year. Technically I started on December 24, 2019, so today is my 297th day of daily blogging. After publishing this post, I have 77 days left to go in the year. I wanted to know how this commitment would affect me, and now I have a pretty good idea. I doubt I’ll discover anything new in the next 77 days that I haven’t already learned in the last 297, but I suppose it’s possible. I’m almost 80% done now, so it’s a breeze to finish the year. Somehow I picked a good year for doing this challenge.

A goal is a decision to take action in a particular direction. There’s no requirement that you must like the outcome. There’s no requirement that you must be able to predict the results. You don’t have to be excited about the benefits. You can actually just be curious to see how pursuing the goal affects you. That is sufficient motivation to pursue and accomplish a variety of goals.

Have you ever been curious about what it would be like to start your own business? Me too. That’s one reason I did it. I wanted to know what it was like. That alone is a good enough reason to do it.

Ever been curious what it’s like to take a month off and go travel? That’s reason enough.

What about going skydiving? Why not see what it’s like to jump out of a plane? Gravity does most of the work.

Are you curious to learn a new musical instrument? Curiosity is enough reason to try it.

For many goals you won’t have a clear idea of the benefits in advance. You’re unique, so when you pursue a goal, you’ll do it differently than anyone else. Your results will be uniquely your own.

Curiosity is a great antidote for perfectionism. Curiosity is flexible and detached from neediness. Curiosity keeps us wondering about what’s possible. Curiosity encourages exploration in the face of uncertainty. Curiosity is a fabulous teacher and an incredible character-sculpting tool.

Other people (such as your parents) may want you to explain your reasons for pursuing a goal. If they won’t accept curiosity as a valid answer, tell them you’re doing it just to upset them. Or combine both – tell they you’re experimenting to see how your pursuit of the goal will disturb them.

If you’re curious about a goal or experience, let that be reason enough to explore it. You don’t have to be reckless. You can still make rational and intelligent choices regarding what to explore. But do accept that rational argument that you’ll learn more by doing than by standing on the sidelines.

Accept that your mind and your character are trained and developed by experience. Whenever you pursue a goal for curiosity’s sake, another reason you’re pursuing it is for character growth. Exploration creates expansion.

Do a quick review of your current goals. Which goals are curiosity-based rather than results-based? Would you like to consider adding at least one new goal purely because you’re curious about it? Give yourself permission to do that.

Some of my most cherished experiences arose from pondering: Hmmm… what would it do to me if I pursued that? I wonder…

Share Button

Good Housekeeping’s Best Christmas Food List For 2020 Is Here

Posted on by
Reply

HuffPost is part of Verizon Media. We and our partners will store and/or access information on your device through the use of cookies and similar technologies, to display personalised ads and content, for ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development.

Your personal data that may be used

  • Information about your device and internet connection, including your IP address
  • Browsing and search activity while using Verizon Media websites and apps
  • Precise location

Find out more about how we use your information in our Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy.

To enable Verizon Media and our partners to process your personal data select ‘I agree‘, or select ‘Manage settings‘ for more information and to manage your choices. You can change your choices at any time by visiting Your Privacy Controls.

Share Button