Does ‘Vabbing’ Actually Make You Irresistible To Men? I Asked A Sexologist

Ever heard of vabbing? No?

Well, nor had I until this morning (how I cherish my life before then).

Turns out the phrase refers to a social media phenomenon (it would be inaccurate to call it a trend, as most people seem appalled by it) that involves wiping vaginal secretions on your pulse points. Yes, really.

In a now-deleted TikTok video, a site user said: “I swear if you vab, you will attract people, like a date, a one-night stand. Or you’ll just get free drinks all night.”

“Elle Woods should have been teaching vabbing instead of the bend and snap – it’s more effective,” the TikToker added.

It’s important to stress that the practice, which is a portmanteau of “vagina” and “dabbing”, really hasn’t taken off – it seems to be more of a point of viral outrage than an actual trend.

Still, I thought I’d speak to sexologist, therapist, and author at Passionerad Sofie Roos about whether the original controversial clip had any merit whatsoever.

And?

Kind of, but not really, the expert said.

“A study published in 2020 found that heterosexual men can smell women’s sexual arousal, and one part of that is the vaginal secretions, especially the lubrication that’s produced when [women are] turned on,” the sexologist explained.

So, there might be a real appeal in the scent – but not in the context of “vabbing,” Roos reckons.

“Research published in Science Direct 2006 finds that female pheromones are very dependent on the social context to work, so wearing vaginal secretions as a perfume in any not-so-sexually-loaded situation will most likely have a disgusting effect,” she shared.

“In my opinion… it’s better to use a good-smelling perfume of high quality” if you want to attract a date, Roos continued.

Smelling of, er, secretions is just “unhygienic” in the wrong context.

Pheromones may actually matter, though

Obviously, there’s no need to “vab.” But speaking to TIME, Noam Sobel, a professor in neurobiology and smell expert, said that our partner’s BO might have more of a say in how much we fancy them than we realise.

“The underlying theory is that you somehow select immune compatibility in a mate” through scent, he told the publication.

Still, Gary Beauchamp, president of the Monell Chemical Senses Centre, told TIME that it’s hard to work out how much, say, sweat actually influences our attraction.

“There are so many things going on with humans, in terms of how you select somebody you want to be with or get married to or have children with… isolating the odour part to it has been very, very difficult.”

It’s far safer to bet that doing something like “vabbing” is a turn-off, don’t you think?

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People Are Just Realising Who Directed One Of Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Most Famous Scenes, And Wow

You may already know that Tim Burton was the unlikely director for both Batman and Batman Returns ― though he doesn’t think he’d do another superhero movie.

But that’s got nothing on the improbable director Jennifer Love Hewitt says is behind one of her most famous scenes.

In I Know What You Did Last Summer, the actor’s character breaks down after months of being followed by a killer. The camera shows her spinning in the street as she screams: “What are you waiting for, huh? What are you waiting for?”.

The moment is probably the best-known scene in the movie – and Jennifer says it was directed by a child, in an interview that’s resurfaced in a viral Instagram Reel.

Jennifer Love Hewitt

via Associated Press

Jennifer Love Hewitt

Speaking to US Weekly in 2018, the star said: “Here’s what’s crazy about that – that scene was actually directed by a kid who won a contest to come on and create a moment for the movie, and it became the biggest part of the movie.”

Though she admitted “I have no idea where he is,” she said his direction was great.

She claimed he said, “I want her to stay in the street and turn around and just… scream, like, ‘What are you waiting for?’”.

“I was literally like, are you kidding me right now?” Jennifer added.

“This is what I’m gonna do? Okay, this is a great idea, let’s have this guy come in,” she said sarcastically.

“And then we were doing it, and it looked amazing. And now everybody loves it.”

“That’s one of the best scenes of the movie. And one of my favourites to recite as well,” an Instagram user commented under a post about the fact.

“That kid is a genius,” another wrote.

I Know What You Did Last Summer’s sequel was announced in 2024 and is due to come out on June 18 of this year.

The actor is set to star in the new release, having previously told US Weekly: “I’m gonna be the creepy old lady who’s still turning around in the street screaming into the air and the kids are gonna hit me. That’s gonna be my part in the next movie!”

We don’t know exactly what her new role in the franchise will be yet ― but there’s been no mention of child directors so far.

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‘She Asked Me If I Wanted To Go Half On A Baby’: People Share Their WTF Dating Moments

If there is one thing that single people can tell you, it’s that not every first date is magical. Some are actually very far from it.

Take me, for example, I once turned up to a date with somebody I thought I liked a lot, only to be told by him that he hated animals and giving to charitable causes. He also wore a t-shirt saying: “I was sober once, worst hour of my life.” It’s safe to say, we were not a match.

However, after reading through a recent Reddit thread, I’m starting to believe that my bad date was actually, by most measures, pretty good – and I got off lightly.

Posting on /r/AskReddit, i_like_maps asked: “What’s the biggest ‘wtf?!’ moment that you’ve had a on a first date?”, and the responses they received were… interesting to say the least.

One person’s hobbies were a little… too much

User Addicus commented: “We met online, chatted a bit, and decided to meet. Now, this was not a hook up situation. We both were, and clearly stated that we were, looking for a long term situation.

“She was cute, seemed smart and reasonably funny. When we got to talking about hobbies and interests, I told her I liked to read, sail, was into motorcycles and playing music. She mentioned that she ‘enjoyed live music, the theatre and the occasional Saturday night gangbang’.”

Ah. Well. Good for her?

Another person had a bananas approach to snacking

Apprehensive_Flan88 recalled: “Took me back to her place asked me if I wanted a snack brought out two fully rotten black bananas and two spoons cracked hers open and started going to town on the compost banana goo kept looking up at me like expecting me to do the same.”

Bleugh. To each their own.

One single had no time to waste when it came to babies

DatboyTeedy revealed: “First Date with a woman about 7-8 years older than me. Convo was going fine at applebees but then she asked me if wanted to go half on a baby. Then she told me her clock is ticking and she wants a kid with me. Needless to say that was the only date.”

Who doesn’t love a woman who knows what she wants?

A little criminal damage got in the way of this date

Joyofresh had quite the first date journey. They recalled: “Met a girl in a cafe, agreed to [a] drink later that week. Day came she didn’t respond. Whatever.

“Later she reached out to me again saying she lost her phone and we started dating. After a month she told me actually the day we originally agreed to a first date she was in jail for breaking into her ex’s apartment…”

I’ve heard some excuses in my time but that one is new even for me.

A third party slithered into this first date, unnoticed

Korar67 said: “Went out on a date. At the end we started making out. Something felt weird on my ear. I pulled back and saw a snake sticking out of the sleeve of her sweater. It was her pet snake. It had been in there the whole time.”

Sure! Why not!

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I Stopped Working Out My Abs And Got The Strongest Core Of My Life

I recently found myself faced with quite the riddle: what’s the difference between an ab workout and a core workout?

If I’d been asked that by a bridge-dwelling troll a few months ago, I’d have resigned myself to a watery end. After all, I only recently learned that while abs are part of your core, your core is so much more than just abs.

I mostly go to the gym for health, rather than aesthetic, reasons. I’m way more worried about my bone density and brain health than I am about my muscle definition. So, I wouldn’t have minded if the difference was mostly cosmetic.

But it turns out that not only are core muscles key to a healthy back (and crucial for preventing falls in ageing), but a lot of the ab-led workouts I’d been doing previously actually did little to strengthen the crucial muscle group.

As a result, I changed my routine ― and I’ve noticed less back pain, better form in other moves (like squats), and even improved posture since.

Wait ― what’s the difference between abs vs core?

Your core is a set of muscles that includes the transverse abdominis and rectus abdominis, oblique, erector spinae, multifidus, diaphragm, quadratus lumborum, hip flexors, and pelvic floor muscles.

It involves groups of muscles we don’t usually think much about when flicking through workout videos, including those that support your spine and hips.

Only one of those muscle groups ― the rectus abdominis ― forms the “six-pack” people might try to achieve through sit-ups and crunches.

But The Mayo Clinic said that while lots of us try to achieve visible abs, broader core exercises (which “train the muscles in your core to work in harmony”) are all too often neglected.

That’s a shame, they said, because true core workouts are key to every other exercise you want to try ― and the stability a strong core gives you makes day-to-day life easier, too.

So, how do I achieve a stronger core?

Good news. The Mayo Clinic said any exercise that involves “the use of your stomach muscles and back muscles in a coordinated way” counts as a core exercise.

That’s why your class instructor is constantly asking you to “engage your core” when squatting, lifting, and even running.

Personally, I started doing what are known as compound exercises ― those which work multiple muscles at once, rather than isolating a couple ― to target both as many core muscles as I can in one go.

Hollow holds, planks, L-sits, pull- and push-ups, and bird dog exercises are all well-known core workouts that include far more muscles than we realise. I still love these.

But lifting weights with your core engaged, as is needed for overhead marches, renegade rows, and kettlebell swings (my personal favourite, and the move that I feel has strengthened me most) works too, and was a revelation to me.

Since incorporating more full-body core movements into my routine, I’ve not only spent more time on the area (a kettlebell swing can be part of a leg day routine, while sit-ups are usually core-specific moves), but added more weight, and therefore resistance, to the action too.

After all, it’s not like your stomach has a way of lifting a dumbbell; you have to recruit other parts of your body for that.

What other exercises work your core rather than just your abs?

Speaking to Harvard’s site, physical therapist Carina O’Neill recommended planks and bridges for the best day-to-day core stability.

But it doesn’t need to be that intense. NHS Fife recommends moves like cat-cow yoga patterns and kneeling planks to keep your trunk steady.

Of course, ab-focused sit-ups and crunches have their place too ― but if you’re hoping to get the best benefits from a strong core, it might be time to expand your understanding of the area to more parts of your body.

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I Tried Mary Berry’s Secret To The Best Spaghetti Bolognese, And I’m Never Going Back

I try a lot of celebrity chef recipes for my job (hard-hitting journalism, you know?).

And while I love Nigella Lawson’s iconic lasagne of love, swear by Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall’s brown butter brownies, and have even allowed Gordon Ramsay’s tips to alter my treasured rocky road recipe, my heart still lies with Mary Berry.

Her Thai-inspired tomato soup was an instant hit in my home. I tried making her 15-minute lemon curd last weekend too ― it was so good, I skipped making the rest of the pie I’d planned and made six jars instead.

So, who else would I turn to for my next spag bol? Though the dish is described as “controversial” on the BBC’s site for its, er, un-Italian star ingredient, hey ― in Mary we trust.

The chef adds cream to her bolognese

The start of Mary’s bolognese is pretty simple. She finely chops onions, celery, and carrot, and fries them over a medium-high heat until soft.

I took Nigella’s lasagne advice here; it’s just faster to whizz them up in a blender rather than chopping them to tiny, even bits.

Once those have softened, she chucks in pork and beef mince (I’ll be honest; I only had beef, and it was fine) and garlic, cooking them until the mince is browned and its liquid has evaporated.

Mary adds tomato purée to the mix and follows it up with passata, chopped tomatoes, stock, wine, and thyme.

If you take nothing else from her advice, I’d recommend the half-passata, half-chopped tomato mix for almost all tomato-based dishes now I’ve tried it. Tinned tommies can be too watery, while the paste can be too thick – this is perfect.

After seasoning it, you bake the bolognese for an hour. I placed tinfoil over my frying pan and whacked it in the oven, though I’m sure a proper Dutch oven is a better option.

Then, you stir in some cream (the controversial ingredient), put the bolognese back in for an hour, and serve it with whatever pasta you like.

Bolognese before baking (left) and after (right).

Amy Glover / HuffPost UK

Bolognese before baking (left) and after (right).

So… what’s the verdict?

I regret to inform you it’s delicious. I don’t know whether it’s the cream or the extended stay in the oven that did it, but this was the deepest, richest, most satisfying bolognese I’ve tried.

It kind of makes sense ― Nigella adds milk to her lasagne’s ragu for a subtly creamy finish, so this is sort of the same idea (only more decadent).

The two-hour bake time is annoying, but it didn’t require much actual active cooking. I work from home, so made the sauce on my lunch break and cooked it in the oven while I was working. As Mary points out, the sauce “can be made up to a day ahead and reheated.”

I ate mine with Parmesan, linguini, and a huge smile on my face ― OK, her star ingredient is “controversial”, but there’s no denying the results are delicious.

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11 Early Signs Your Relationship Is Quietly Falling Apart

A 2011 meta-analysis of studies found that marriage doesn’t actually make couples happier ― if your relationship with your partner wasn’t great before the big day, their research says, it likely won’t become that way afterwards.

That’s why Evon Inyang, a licensed associate marriage and family therapist and the founder of ForwardUs Counselling previously told HuffPost UK that it’s important not to go along with a failing relationship for the sake of it.

There’s no need to settle for unhappiness “just because invitations have been sent out, the dress has been bought and deposits have been paid,” she wrote.

Still, many of us struggle to recognise when our relationship is “off.” So it’s a good thing u/one-droplet recently asked the netizens of r/AskReddit: “What are the early signs of a failing relationship that most people ignore?”

Here are some of the most-upvoted responses:

1) “Not wanting to talk to them about things you find interesting because you feel their reaction will ruin it.”

Credit: u/Oograsti

2) “In my experience, when you stop imagining a future together, that’s how you know it won’t last.”

3) “When you love the memories more than the person standing in front of you.”

Credit: u/dragonzander1

4) “Only one person doing all the work.”

Credit: u/Slick_Nick420

5) “I used to slow down at work just so I would have to work late even though I wasn’t getting paid for it.”

“Did this for years before I finally decided to leave my ex.”

6) “When you stop arguing with your spouse. Not because things are good but because it doesn’t matter anymore.”

7) “When conversations become minimal or surface-level, it can indicate a deeper disconnect.”

Credit: u/LaylaLoyal3

8) “If a partner is too busy for you then they’ve found something more important than you.”

“If you’re of importance to someone, they’ll make time for you.”

Credit: u/saqreye

9) “Indifference. When you really have no emotional response to each other.”

“This the death of a relationship.”

Credit: u/dma1965

10) “When you stop sharing the little things — random thoughts, funny memes, or how their day went.”

“When the small talk disappears, the connection starts fading.”

Credit: u/GreedyFig6373

11) “Feeling annoyed when you know you have to see them in the evening. Or when you hear them chewing.”

“Or when they start talking and you just wish they would stop soon. Feeling annoyed when they kiss or hug you or give you affection. You might not even know you are annoyed.

“You just get that heavy feeling in your chest when you have to be in their vicinity. You hear an ‘ugh’ go through your mind.”

Credit: u/Brynhild

Do you agree with these or have any thoughts to add?

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Here’s The Real Reason Your Cat Licks You, And It’s Pretty Heartwarming

Ever had your shoe stolen by a dog?

Well, according to experts, your furry friend is likely just reassured by your scent and wants to be near it.

Cute as that seems, dogs have so many other ways of showing affection (wagging their tail, running up to you, leaning against you) that you might be left wondering why they had to turn to your favourite slipper in the first place.

Surely that’s the sort of behaviour you’d expect from notoriously cryptic cats, whose rarer displays of affection include stretching at, kneading on, and licking their owner?

And does your cat licking you mean they like you at all?

It could be a form of “allogrooming”

According to PetMD, we can’t be 100% sure (typical felines) ― but one of the leading theories vets have is that your cat might lick you to get closer to you.

“Mothers groom their kittens and cats may groom one another, which is called allogrooming,” the publication shared.

This helps to strengthen social bonds and increases a sense of belonging (aww).

Blue Cross’ animal behaviourist, Claire Stallard, said that allogrooming is the most likely reason your cat is licking you.

Other causes may include your cat seeking attention from you, your cat liking the taste of your skin (yes, really ― be careful with this if you’re wearing lotions, fake tan, or perfume), and them identifying you as a part of their group.

Rarely, the habit could indicate stress or anxiety. This is especially likely if their ears are flat to their head and/or their tail is swishing

See your vet if your cat suddenly starts licking you a lot out of nowhere, though. Very occasionally, this can be caused by medical conditions that create nausea.

Why are cats’ tongues so scratchy?

A study published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences found that cats’ tongues actually have little hooks, rather than cones, which allow them to hold saliva on their tongue.

When cats lick themselves (or you), this is designed to comb their fur and distribute the cleansing saliva evenly across the surface they go for ― sometimes at the cost of a scratching sensation on your skin.

Per BBC Science Focus, this is partly because cats (unlike dogs) are solitary hunters. When a cat is hunting, they need to disguise their scent ― their specially-designed tongue helps them to do this to themselves easily.

This is less important for dogs, whose pack-hunting technique requires less disguise from both their prey and potential predators.

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I’m A Sex Expert — 4 Steps For Women Who Struggle To Orgasm

Getting off, the big O, la petite mort, cumming… There is a plethora of ways to describe the female orgasm and yet, many of us still aren’t quite making it to that final moment.

In fact, according to sexperts at Lovehoney, data shows that just 15% of women can orgasm during penetrative sex alone.

Additionally, 2023 research by Durex found that only 5% of women would say that they always orgasm during sex.

So, why is this?

It partially comes down to The Orgasm Gap

Of course, we know that the journey can be just as fun and enjoyable as the destination but, if we’re very honest with ourselves, not being able to orgasm can be pretty frustrating, to say the least.

The disparity between men and women having orgasms is defined as ‘the orgasm gap’.

Psychology professor Laurie Mintz wrote about this phenomenon for The Conversation and said the main reason for it “is that women are not getting the clitoral stimulation they need”.

“And cultural messages about the supremacy of intercourse feed into this. Indeed, countless films, TV shows, books and plays portray women orgasming from intercourse alone,” said Mintz.

“Popular men’s magazines also give advice on intercourse positions to bring women to orgasm. And while some of the positions do include clitoral stimulation, the message is still that intercourse is the central and most important sexual act.”

It can also be down to a health concern

If you can’t orgasm from penetrative sex or clitoral stimulation, you may have a condition called ‘Anorgasmia’.

Medical experts at Mayo Clinic explain: “Multiple factors may lead to anorgasmia. These include relationship or intimacy issues, cultural factors, physical or medical conditions, and medicines.

“Treatments can include education about sexual stimulation, sexual enhancement devices, individual or couple therapy, and medicines.”

If you are having sexual difficulties, speak to your GP or reach out to relationship experts at Relate.

Four steps you can take to reach orgasm

Annabelle Knight, sex and relationship expert at Lovehoney, says: “Achieving better orgasms for women involves a combination of understanding your body, communication, and addressing both physical and emotional factors.”

Get to know your own body better with masturbation

“Ensure that you don’t overlook self-exploration and masturbation,” Knight urges.

“Spending time exploring what feels good to you, and trying different techniques such as using fingers, sex toys, lube and varying positions can help you understand your body better.”

Knight reveals that while the data at Lovehoney shows that just 15% of women can orgasm during penetrative sex alone, that number jumps to 46% when using a sex toy.

Communicate with your partner

If you have a partner, open up to them about the problems that you’re having.

Knight advises: “Openly discussing what you both like, providing guidance during sex, and engaging in mutual exploration can help with intimacy and satisfaction from orgasm.”

That sounds pretty fun, actually.

Try to relax

Trying to coax your body into an orgasm when you’re mentally at a heightened stress level probably won’t get you very far.

Instead, Knight suggests that you try relaxing with deep breathing, meditation, or yoga, being present in the moment, and building anticipation through prolonged foreplay to heighten arousal and intensify your orgasm.

Check in on your emotional wellbeing

“Emotional and relationship factors are equally important when it comes to having a satisfying sex life,” adds the sexpert.

“Building emotional intimacy with a partner, addressing unresolved conflicts, and having a positive body image through self-love and acceptance will help transform how you feel in the bedroom.”

We’re rooting for you.

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People Are Realising The Real Reason You Can’t Recline Your Seat During Takeoff, And I Had No Idea

You know those ominous black clumps you see in the branches of trees sometimes?

Well, it took a Reddit post for me to realise that those aren’t actually bird’s nests.

Nope ― they’re either mistletoe (which is technically a parasitic plant), or a “witch’s broom” growth irregularity spurred on by animal or bacterial invasions.

And now, a post shared to r/explainlikeimfive has inspired me to ask experts why we actually have to recline our chairs on takeoff and landing.

In a recent post shared by u/bishopZ, the site user asked: “Why do airline passengers have to put their seats into a full upright position for takeoff? Why does it matter?”

Takeoff and landing are the riskiest parts of the flight

A now-deleted Reddit account wrote under the original comment: “You’re most likely to have some sort of accident during takeoff and landing. This is also why your tray tables have to be up and you can’t have laptops during these times: ease of evacuation.”

Indeed aerospace safety expert and associate professor of aeronautical science Anthony Brickhouse told Business Insider that 49% of deaths happen during landing, while 14% occur at takeoff.

Speaking to HuffPost UK, a spokesperson for the Royal Aeronautical Society’s Flight Operations Specialist Group explained: “There are two primary safety-related reasons why aircraft seats must be in the upright position for take-off and landing.

“The first is that the seat gives the occupant maximum impact protection when upright, and its structure locks into position accordingly. Being upright also reduces the possibility of the occupant ‘submarining’ under their lap belt in the event of a violent deceleration.”

“Submarining” happens when a person’s seatbelt is a little loose, allowing their body to slip underneath it at high speed. They slide under the belt, increasing the risk of injury.

“The second reason is that reclined seats reduce the space available in the row behind for occupants to escape quickly if an emergency evacuation is required,” the Royal Aeronautical Society’s Flight Operations Specialist Group added.

In fact, people who listen to “boring” plane protocol are more likely to survive disaster

The Guardian shared experts’ research into survivors of plane accidents. They found that people who had survived (rare) catastrophes had some things in common ― including being more likely to have read the plane’s safety briefing.

Knowing where the exits are, keeping your shoes on, and practising both the brace position and undoing your seatbelt can all help too.

And remember, Amanda Ripley, author of The Unthinkable: Who Survives When Disaster Strikes, says: “between 1983 and 2000, 56% of passengers involved in serious plane accidents survived.”

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I Tried Mary Berry’s 15-Minute Lemon Curd Recipe, And I’ve Made 6 Jars Since

Ex-Great British Bake-Off host Mary Berry doesn’t just do sweet treats ― we love her sausage casserole and “Mexican lasagne” recipes for our midweek meals.

With that said, there’s a reason one of her (many) cookbooks is called The Baking Bible. When I want to make dessert, I turn to the Cordon Bleu-trained chef first.

This weekend, I craved a lemon meringue pie. So, I thought I’d give her pared-down recipe a go (I’d tried more complex recipes recently, like a pomegranate curd, and had been left with a runny disaster).

People, the pie never got made. The curd was so good, I simply slathered it on slices of bread and ate spoonfuls from the jar ― I re-made double the recipe again to stay in stock for the rest of the month.

How does Mary Berry make her lemon curd?

Her instructions are simple: whisk one egg per whole lemon zest and juice to 75g caster sugar and 56g butter together. Twice this calculation makes roughly a jar.

Then, keep whisking the lot over a gentle heat for seven to 10 minutes. Mary warns: “Do not allow the mixture to boil or it may split.”

For that reason, I made my first batch in a heatproof bowl over a saucepan of boiling water (like the one you’d use for melting chocolate).

I recommend this if, like me, you’re using thin, cheap saucepans; if you have a heavy-bottomed saucepan and really good temperature control on your hob, though, a saucepan should be fine.

Once the mixture has thickened enough to coat the back of a wooden spoon, you’re ready to spoon the curd into a sterilised jar ― it should thicken in a couple of hours, and the curd will last for a month or so in the fridge.

I loved that Mary uses the full zest and curd of all lemons. It makes a brilliantly tangy curd, and also means your kitchen smells amazing for hours.

I also think it made the curd less creamy, which I personally prefer.

Lemon curd cooking on left: jarred on the right

Amy Glover / HuffPost UK

Lemon curd cooking on left: jarred on the right

Any other tips?

Yes! Mary’s advice for sterilising the jars accidentally ensures they’re capable of taking in the hot curd without breaking or cracking, too.

“To sterilise jars, wash the jars in very hot, soapy water or put through the hot cycle of a dishwasher,” she writes.

Then, “place the jars onto a baking tray and slide into an oven preheated to 160C/325F/Gas 3 for 10–15 minutes”.

I spooned my curd into the jars while they were still warm(ish) from the oven. That way, you run far less risk of a shattering disaster.

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