Ukraine Wins Eurovision As UK Finishes In Second Place

Posted on 15/05/2022 by Boris Clair

Ukraine has won the Eurovision Song Contest with folk-rap group Kalush Orchestra’s song Stefania.

The act have been the frontrunners since Putin’s invasion earlier this year, with organisers also banning Russia from competing.

Ukraine joined the contest in 2003 and its three wins make it one of the most successful of the newer competitor countries, having also triumphed in 2004 and 2016.

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The United Kingdom had led the vote for most of Saturday night’s results after Sam Ryder’s performance of Space Man came out on top of the jury vote.

However, the public overwhelmingly backed Ukraine, finishing with 631 points on the leaderboard, with the UK landing in second place with 466 points.

It was the UK’s best performance in the Song Content in more than 20 years, and proved to be a remarkable reversal of fortunes following last year’s dreaded nul points.

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After their win, Kalush Orchestra said: “Thank you for supporting Ukraine. This victory is for every Ukrainian. Slava Ukraini.”

During their performance, which combined rap and Ukrainian folklore, the group were dressed in elaborate outfits, including long multi-coloured fringed ensembles.

Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelensky said: “Our courage impresses the world our music conquers Europe!

“Next year Ukraine will host Eurovision! For the third time in its history. And I believe – not for the last time.

“We will do our best to one day host the participants and guests of Eurovision in Ukrainian Mariupol. Free, peaceful, rebuilt.”

He added: “Thank you for the victory of @Kalush.official and all those who gave their votes for us!

“I am sure that our victorious chord in the battle with the enemy is just around the corner.

“Glory to Ukraine!”

UK prime minister Boris Johnson called Ukraine’s win “a clear reflection of not just your talent, but of the unwavering support for your fight for freedom”.

He also extended congratulations to the UK’s runner-up in the competition, tweeting: “Incredibly proud of @SamRyderMusic and how he brilliantly represented the UK tonight.”

12 Affordable, Delicious Meals You Can Cook With A Can Of Fish

Posted on 15/05/2022 by Boris Clair

If you think fancy chefs never reach for a can of tuna when they need to pull together a quick meal, we can’t help but say ”Sorry, Charlie.” We talked to chefs who regularly use canned tuna, salmon and other fishes as entrees and as ingredients in other dishes.

“I’m a big fan of conservas, which are preserved foods, such as pickles, jam or canned foods, which are ‘put up’ in jars or tins so the product lasts longer,” TV personality and chef Andrew Zimmern tells HuffPost, adding that they’re often less expensive by weight than other comparable proteins. “As meat and poultry prices continue to climb, home cooks can find tins of beautiful salmon, tuna – and mackerel, sardines, clams and mussels – in their local markets and save real dollars by incorporating them into their regular meal planning.”

It’s heartening to note that not only is canned fish often inexpensive, but it’s nutritious. “Canned fish contains omega-3s, with benefits include fighting inflammation, skin nourishing, gut healing, helping you feel full longer and more,” said Jen Smiley, founder of Wake Up & Read the Labels.

And then there’s the convenience factor. “The best thing about canned fish to me is that I can always have it on hand to make into a quick dinner,” said Christine Pittman, founder of CookTheStory. “If I forget to take the chicken out of the freezer, or if I run out of time and can’t get to the grocery store, having some canned fish on hand always saves the day.”

It’s an affordable option that’s probably already in your pantry

Chef Rossi, owner and executive chef of New York caterer The Raging Skillet, credits canned tuna with helping her keep body and soul together during a cash-strapped time. “When I left home to be a starving artist, I swiped an entire pantry shelf of tuna, which my mother had gotten with coupons,” she said. “I took her Ragu tomato sauce and dried pasta, too. I survived on a concoction of tomato sauce, canned tuna and olives I swiped from the bar next door.”

“Decades later, when I became a chef, I needed to create pasta special one day, so I mixed tuna we hadn’t sold for the lunchtime tuna melt special, marinara sauce, capers and olives to make ‘Starving Artist Pasta Puttanesca.’ It sold out.”

Think canned fish is too fishy? Try these fixes

“If you’re using a good-quality brand of canned fish, it shouldn’t be too fishy,” said Curtis Stone, chef and owner of Maude and Gwen Butcher Shop and Restaurant in Los Angeles. “I suggest relying on the acidity of lemon juice and zest and the brininess of capers to address any ‘fishiness’ issues.”

One tip is to pair canned fish with boldly flavoured ingredients, chef and cookbook author Robin Asbell said. “There’s a reason they put mayonnaise in tuna salad, since it’s got an assertive presence and lots of tang,” Abell said. “Adding in spices, chilies, crunchy vegetables, cornichons and olives all work to play down the fishy qualities.”

“Really, the hidden secret is in the sauce, so I suggest you think about mustard,” Smiley said. “Pour some on top and it’s all you’re tasting.”

What’s best: packed in oil or water?

The great debate among tuna lovers still rages on – oil-packed or water-packed?

Rossi insists on white albacore tuna in water. “I think ‘light’ tuna tastes fishy, and to this day I can tell when my tuna salad was made with light, not white,” she said. “Even the smallest amount of fishiness and I’m out the door.”

Another member of the packed-in-water fan club is Robin Selden, executive chef and managing partner of Marcia Selden Catering. “I love Bumble Bee white albacore tuna in water. It’s not fishy, it never has that canned fish taste – and it’s what I grew up with,” she said.

On the other side of the debate is Davis, who loves Chicken of the Sea in oil. “It’s moister that way,” he said.

For Asbell, it depends on the dish. “If you’re using it in a pasta and want lots of fishy umami, buy it in olive oil and use that oil in the recipe,” she said. “If you’re emphasising other flavours, buy water-packed, drain it well, and marinate it a bit before adding it to the dish.”

6 standout tuna dishes

Pan bagnat: “I love a good Niçoise salad, and this sandwich is all those great salad flavours packed into crusty and chewy bread,” Stone said. “It’s the perfect make-ahead sandwich to take to the beach or a picnic. The flavours marinate with a bit of time, but it’s just as delicious to eat straightaway.”

Here’s Curtis Stone’s recipe.

Tomato and tuna pasta: “I toss fresh heirloom tomatoes and oil-canned tuna into hot, drained pasta,” Selden said. “The pasta soaks up the olive oil, and the tomatoes almost blanch from the heat of the pasta. Hit it with some red pepper flakes, freshly grated Parmesan and freshly torn basil, and you’ll feel like you’re in Italy.”

Tonnato sauce: This classic Italian sauce is made with anchovies and tuna. “It’s one of the very best summer dishes,” Sandy Davis, chef for New York-based Roxo Events, said.

“I make the classic sauce for cold poached meat and a looser version to dress salads,” Zimmern said. While it came to fame as part of the dish viella tonnato, which is made with veal, you can swap out the meat in place of pasta, rice or beans, and you’ll still have a delicious meal at a lower cost.

Tuna croquettes: “One very nostalgic dish for me is my mom’s tuna croquette recipe, which involves mixing tuna, eggs and breadcrumbs, forming it into small patties, then sautéing,” Selden said. “It’s a very simple and delicious way to get kids to eat fish. It worked for my mom, and to this day we all love them.”

Tuna noodle casserole: “There isn’t a Baby Boomer around who isn’t familiar with good old tuna noodle casserole with crushed potato chips on top,” Davis said. “It’s fast, cheap and tasty. One can – or maybe two if you’ve got extra coins – will feed many folks.”

Tuna salad: “There are those times when comfort is needed, and you just have to break down and make the tuna salad of your grandmother,” Davis said. For me, that means using Miracle Whip, boiled eggs and sweet relish.”

Selden has a different take: “My go-to tuna salad uses Hellman’s mayonnaise — just enough to bind it together — freshly squeezed lemon juice, diced celery, sweet onion, green apple and lots of freshly chopped dill. The addition of tart, crunchy apples and savoury dill really do the trick. Slap that between two pieces of yummy bread and add some potato chips to your sandwich for even more crunch.”

Don't bother cooking fresh salmon for salmon burgers -- canned works perfectly. — Don’t bother cooking fresh salmon for salmon burgers — canned works perfectly.

6 superstar salmon dishes

Appetisers: “This simple canned salmon dip is always a crowd favourite,” Pittman said. “Another party treat is my lox dip recipe. I add canned salmon along with the lox (smoked salmon), so there’s a lot of salmon flavour, but at a lower cost.”

Creamy pasta sauce: “Warm up sour cream or crème fraîche with dill or parsley, garlic, salt and pepper,” Pittman said. “Then add canned fish until just heated through before tossing with cooked pasta.”

Salmon loaf: “If you want to dress up canned salmon, there’s a Great Depression favourite that my paternal grandmother used to make — salmon loaf with mustard cream sauce,” Davis said. “Use canned salmon, crushed saltines, eggs and mayo.”

Salade Niçoise with salmon tonnato sauce: “Trust me on this: Make a traditional Provençale salade Niçoise with salmon instead of tuna,” Zimmern said. “Dress the egg, tinned fish, potatoes, greens, tomatoes and olives with a tonnato sauce made with salmon instead of tuna. You’ll have your mind blown.”

Salmon burgers

“Mix together a can of salmon, two eggs, breadcrumbs, dill and lemon juice,” Pittman said. “You just need to heat the patties through and then pop them into buns, along with your favourite burger toppings.”

I Here’s the recipe.

Conversations With Friends: Where Have You Seen The Cast Before?

Posted on 15/05/2022 by Boris Clair

The BBC’s long-awaited adaptation of Sally Rooney’s Conversations With Friends is finally here to fill the Normal People-shaped hole in your life, and no doubt millions of us will be binging all 12 episodes over the coming days and weeks.

Among the cast are some familiar faces from a range of films and TV shows, so if it’s bugging you where you know them all from, allow us to help with that…

Sasha Lane (Bobbi)

Sasha is best known for her role as Hunter C-20 in the first season of the Marvel series Loki on Disney+ and for appearing in Amazon Prime’s US remake of Channel 4 drama Utopia, playing Jessica Hyde.

Her film roles also include 2016’s American Honey, 2018′s The Miseducation Of Cameron Post and 2019’s Hellboy.

You may also recognise Sasha from appearing in Lewis Capaldi’s video for his hit Before You Go.

Alison Oliver (Frances)

Conversations With Friends marks Alison’s first major TV role, and looks set to be turned into a household name alongside her co-stars, just like Normal People’s Daisy Edgar-Jones and Paul Mescal.

After Conversations With Friends, Alison is also set to appear in the forthcoming BBC drama Best Interests alongside Sharon Horgan and Michael Sheen in 2023.

Joe Alwyn (Nick)

Conversation With Friends is actually only Joe’s second TV credit, having previously appeared in the BBC’s adaptation of A Christmas Carol in 2019, in which he played Bob Cratchit.

He is likely better known for his big screen roles in The Favourite and Mary Queen Of Scots, starring alongside Olivia Colman and Margot Robbie, respectively.

Of course, Joe might also be known to many for his relationship with Taylor Swift, who he has been with since 2016.

He even won a Grammy Award in 2021 for his co-writing work on Taylor’s album Folklore.

Jemima Kirke (Melissa)

If you’re a Sex Education fan, then you will likely recognise Jemima from the latest series of the hit Netflix show, where she was introduced as Hope, the new headteacher of Moordale Secondary School.

Prior to that, she appeared as Jessa Johansson in all six seasons of Lena Dunham’s Girls and as Adelaide in Netflix’s Maniac, while her film credits include Tiny Furniture and Untogether.

Jemima also appeared in the video for Zayn Malik and Sia’s 2017 hit Dusk Til Dawn.

Justine Mitchell (Paula)

Justine is best known in her native Ireland, where she starred in 2010 sketch show Your Bad Self and recent sitcom Finding Joy.

She also played a detective in the ITV drama Cheat and starred in Alibi drama Smother, with other guest appearances include Wild At Heart and Doctors.

More recently, Justine popped up in the final season of Derry Girls, playing a grown-up Janette.

Tommy Tiernan (Dennis)

Irish comic Tommy hosts his own chat show The Tommy Tiernan Show, which has ran since 2017.

Of course, Derry Girls fans will also recognise him for playing Gerry in all three series of the Channel 4 sitcom.

His other TV credits include Small Potatoes and Little Crackers, while he also appeared in Ed Sheeran’s music video for Galway Girl.

Alex Murphy (Philip)

You may recognise Alex for his breakthrough role as Conor MacSweeney in the 2016 comedy film The Young Offenders – a role he reprised for the BBC Three sitcom of the same name two years later.

Tadhg Murphy (Derek)

Tadhg appeared in Sky One comedy Brassic alongside Michelle Keegan, playing the role of Gary.

He had a guest role in Amazon Prime’s Absentia, with his other credits including Canadian drama Vikings.

Sallay Garnett (Evelyn)

As well as an actor, Salley is also a singer who goes by the stage name of Loah.

Salley also appeared alongside Conversations With Friends co-star Justine Mitchell in Finding Joy, while her other credits include Irish drama Striking Out.

Kerry Fox (Valerie)

New Zealand actor Kerry has made guest appearances in a plethora of British dramas, including The Split, Last Tango In Halifax, National Treasure, Death In Paradise and Vera.

Conversations With Friends begins on Sunday at 10pm on BBC Three, with all episodes also available as a boxset on BBC iPlayer.

Vitamin D: Could UV-mushrooms help fix the nation’s issue?

Posted on 15/05/2022 by Boris Clair

With one in 10 deficient in vitamin D, the government is exploring new ways to boost the UK’s intake.

Junk food: Obesity strategy falling apart, Jamie Oliver says

Posted on 14/05/2022 by Boris Clair

Boris Johnson is accused of “playing politics with children’s health” after delaying new restrictions.

Dame Deborah James says Prince William’s visit will be a ‘special memory’

Posted on 14/05/2022 by Boris Clair

The cancer campaigner says the prince went “above and beyond” in visiting her to confer her damehood.

Exclusive: Charities Demand Urgent Government Action On Cost Of Living Crisis

Posted on 14/05/2022 by Boris Clair

Leading charities have demanded the government take immediate action to help people struggling with the cost of living crisis.

It comes after Boris Johnson was criticised for unveiling 38 new bills in the Queen’s Speech, with none of them designed to immediately alleviate the financial pain being suffered right now by millions across the UK.

The prime minister insisted the government’s plans would grow the economy and create thousands of new jobs, thereby bringing down living costs in the longer term.

But charities and think tanks contacted by HuffPost UK said ministers needed to take steps straight away as the public deal with soaring energy bills, rising inflation, higher council tax and increasing interest rates.

They warn that unless they do, minis risk turning a crisis into “a national emergency”.

What has the government announced so far?

In Ferbruary, Rishi Sunak unveiled a £9bn package of measures to help bring down energy and council tax bills.

Under the plan, energy bills will be reduced by £200, with the money being repaid in charges over the next four years. In addition, households in bands A-D are seeing £150 knocked off their council tax bills.

This is in addition to other measures including a 5p reduction in fuel duty, reducing the Universal Credit taper rate to allow people to keep more of the money they earn, increasing the national minimum wage, £25 extra a week in cold weather payments and raising the national insurance thresholds.

According to the Treasury, the total cost of the support already announced is £22bn.

Rishi Sunak is under pressure to do more to help with the cost of living.

Why was the Queen’s Speech such a let-down?

The Queen’s Speech setting out the government’s legislative plans for the next 12 months – delivered by Prince Charles after Her Majesty withdrew over health concerns – contained a total of 38 bills.

However, Boris Johnson was at pains to stress that there was no new money to help people feeling the pinch.

The prime minister said: “We must remember that for every pound of taxpayer’s money we spend on reducing bills now, it is a pound we are not investing in bringing down bills and prices over the longer term.

“And that if anything, this moment makes clear our best remedy lies in urgently
delivering on our mission to turbo charge the economy, create jobs and spread
opportunity across the country.”

The Prince of Wales delivers the Queen's Speech during the State Opening of Parliament in the House of Lords. — The Prince of Wales delivers the Queen’s Speech during the State Opening of Parliament in the House of Lords.

Does Boris Johnson get it?

As an unapologetic populist, the prime minister’s instinct will be to make a major announcement on an extra package of financial measures to help struggling voters. But as a fiscal conservative, the chancellor will be resisting any such moves at this time.

This probably explains the bizarre mix-up between Number 10 and the Treasury on the same day the Queen’s Speech was announced.

Johnson told the House of Commons that he and Sunak would say more on the cost of living “in the days to come”, immediately increasing speculation of an emergency budget.

But sources close to Sunak quickly made clear that they knew nothing about it, and insisted no new measures were due before the autumn.

One ally of the Chancellor told HuffPost UK there were “no announcements as far as we are aware”.

They added: “Rishi has always been clear that we would set out plans for support on energy bills for autumn when we know what the [energy] price cap is going to be – but we’re not there yet.”

Does the government have any plan at all?

Johnson chaired a special cabinet meeting at an away day in Stoke with his top team on Thursday, where the government’s response to the cost of living crisis was top of the agenda.

Although no new announcements were made afterwards, it is understood that the PM and chancellor are eyeing a potential tax cut before MPs depart for the summer recess.

Talk of a windfall tax on energy firms’ profits – as demanded by Labour – is also increasing, despite both Johnson and Sunak repeatedly voicing their scepticism about such a move, arguing that it could hamper investment.

We also know that the chancellor will unveil a further package of financial support in the autumn, when the energy price cap is expected to rise significantly once again.

But critics say those on those on the lowest incomes, many of whom are regularly forced to choose between heating their homes and feeding their children, cannot wait several months for the government to step in.

Boris Johnson chairs a cabinet meeting in Stoke-on-Trent

What should the government be doing right now?

HuffPost UK contacted a range of charities to get their take on the crisis and ask what they believe Johnson and co should do without delay to alleviate the suffering of so many people across the country.

The universal view was that the government should be using the benefits system to urgently target support at those who need it most.

Katie Schmuecker, principal policy adviser at the Joseph Rowntree Foundation, said: “The widening gap between the incomes of the poorest and what they need to afford the essentials is not just something that happens naturally – it is a political choice.

“The chancellor could have used the Spring Statement to ensure that benefits were uprated in line with this year’s very high inflation, and it is not too late to act to protect people from the worst of this crisis. It just needs a political will and speedy action.”

Tom Marsland, policy manager at disability equality charity Scope, said disabled people were already dealing with the increased cost of electric wheelchairs, ventilators or adapted vehicles, before factoring in soaring energy bills.

“The Queen’s Speech was an opportunity to help disabled people, but this didn’t happen,” he said.

“The government must urgently provide increased financial support to disabled people direct through the welfare system.

“Disabled people have seen a real terms cut to their cut to benefits as they rise less than inflation. The government has said it will uprate disability benefits again next April, but what are disabled people supposed to do for the next 12 months if they can’t afford basic essentials like food and heating? We need to see benefits rise in line with inflation now.”

Polly Neate chief executive of Shelter, said: “Housing is at the root of the cost-of-living crisis. Private rents are higher than ever, bills are skyrocketing, and housing benefit is lagging dangerously behind. We’ve heard from renters whose landlords have said unless they agree to a hike in their rent they will be kicked out.

“As a priority, the government needs to end the freeze on housing benefit so people can still pay their rent. It must also scrap no-fault evictions as quickly as possible to prevent more people from losing their homes unnecessarily, and the additional financial hardship that brings.”

Peter Grigg, chief Executive of Home-Start UK, said: “As a minimum, the government should ensure benefits rise in line with the cost of living. Benefits are rising by 3.1 per cent, but inflation is around 8 per cent and prices and energy bills rising even higher.

“So for low-income families this all means an income drop. If we can’t find ways to reduce bills and increase financial support for families, it will be pushing even more parents and children into poverty. Our children deserve better.”

Emma Revie, chief executive of the Trussell Trust, said: “We are calling on the UK government to bring benefits in line with the true cost of living. As an urgent first step benefits should be increased by at least 7 per cent.

“In the longer term, we need the government to introduce a commitment in the benefits system to ensure that everyone has enough money in their pockets to be prevented from falling into destitution. By failing to make benefits payments realistic for the times we face, the government now risks turning the cost of living crisis into a national emergency.”

Isabel Hughes of the Food Foundation said: “A commitment to a new Food Bill would have demonstrated that the government was serious about tackling the problems in the food system and making sustainable long-term action to reduce spiralling food insecurity levels a priority. Families need and deserve more support.”

The economist’s view

HuffPost UK also asked the highly-respected Resolution Foundation for its view on what the government could be doing, but is currently failing to.

Mike Brewer, the think tank’s chief economist, agreed with the charities that the benefits system must be mobilised to help the poorest in the country before it’s too late.

He said: “With average incomes on course to fall by around £1,200 this year – the tightest squeeze in half a century – new support will need to be bold.

“Another big rise in the energy price cap this October means that further help with energy bills is inevitable. And while further universal support will be welcome, the Government must also target support at the low-and-middle income families who are at the sharp end of rising cost pressures.

“The most effective way to do this is to bring forward the big increase in benefits due next spring to this autumn, or even sooner if possible. This would deliver significant cash support to millions of hard-hit households, hold back rising poverty levels and would carry no long-term cost to the Treasury.”

How Soon Is Too Soon To Become Attached To Your New Partner’s Children?

Posted on 14/05/2022 by Boris Clair

For parents dating again, figuring out when to introduce a new partner to your kids is a tricky calculus: How many months should you wait? Does the relationship feel stable and safe enough to take that step? Is your child emotionally ready to meet someone new since you split from your co-parent? What will your ex say?

The stress doesn’t end there; once the introductions have been made, you need to check in with your kids to make sure it’s all not too much, too fast, and that they’re comfortable around your new partner.

This common post-divorce dilemma has played out on a very public stage in recent months, since reality star Kim Kardashian has started dating Saturday Night Livekim comedian Pete Davidson.

Things seem to be going swimmingly for the new couple, but Kardashian’s ex, Kanye West, has expressed concern about Davidson’s relationship with his kids. (At one point West even dramatically wrote, “NO YOU WILL NEVER MEET MY CHILDREN” on an Instagram post.)

Still, photos taken recently show that Davidson has met the couple’s kids. And earlier this month, another photo popped up showing what appears to be a new tattoo for the comedian: The ink reads KNSCP, letters many fans believe stand for Kardashian’s four children with West: North, Saint, Chicago, and Psalm.

If the tattoo is real – and Davidson does have a history of getting tattoos for the women in his life, including a branding in dedication to Kardashian – it’s a showy display of commitment on his part.

Family therapists we spoke to wondered just how committed a person could be after roughly six months of dating.

“The tattoo seems more like evidence of his impulsivity rather than his genuine attachment to his girlfriend’s kids, which he could not possibly have in any substantive way after only six months,” says Virginia Gilbert, a Los Angeles-based therapist specialising in high-conflict divorce.

“I think six months is too soon to meet her kids, especially with an in-process messy divorce and Kanye being so opposed to the meeting, but everything Kim does is in the public eye, it would have been hard to keep Pete a secret, so the question is probably moot,” she added.

Kurt Smith, a family therapist in Roseville, California, who mostly works with men, says that the desire to connect deeper with your significant other by showing interest in their kids is understandable.

Ultimately, though, new partners need to recognise that it’s a delicate dance ― one that usually requires a healthy distance.

“Pete should be asking himself why that was so important for him to do at this stage of the relationship,” he says.

Since this co-parenting quandary is top of mind for many right now, we decided to ask family therapists and other experts on blended families to share the advice they’d give to parents newly dating again like Kardashian. Here’s what they say.

First off, when should introductions be made?

For divorced parents, when to introduce and involve a new partner in children’s lives is a complex question, with no “one size fits all” answer.

For some people, six months is enough; for others, a slower approach might be necessary, says Dawn O. Braithwaite, a professor of communication studies at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln.

Braithwaite has spent her career studying how families interact to create, navigate and change relationships, routines and traditions, especially in stepfamilies and chosen families.

According to her, parents need to consider the following six things before making introductions:

What they believe will be the future of their new relationship
The age of the children
How long it’s been since the separation or divorce
How well children have adjusted to changes in their family situation
The relationship with the co-parent
The interest the new partner has in meeting the kids

“While there are exceptions, most scholars have found that new partners can play a positive role in children’s lives, but that they should go slow and act as a friend for children rather than overstepping and acting in ways that are confusing or inappropriate for children,” the professor says.

Meetups should be casual at first

To avoid coming on too strong or overstepping boundaries, keep those early getting-to-know-you meetups as casual as possible: Arrange a park date or meet up for a Marvel movie and pizza.

“The onus needs to be on the new partner to meet the kids where they are ― meaning you need to participate in the kinds of things they like to do,” Gilbert says. “I would also suggest postponing adult sleepovers until the kids become comfortable with the new partner.”

Remember that your relationship is not with your partner’s kids — it’s with your partner only

If you’re the parent, reinforce that you’re not a package deal – not yet, anyway.

“Maintaining this boundary is important for both partners, the health of the new relationship, and, most importantly, for the kids’ health,” Smith says.

Move too quickly and you could quickly incur the annoyance of the kids ― and the potential ire of the other parent.

“I’ve counselled divorcing parents where his new girlfriend posted pics on social media of his kids at a birthday party like they were her own and believe me, it did not go over well with the other parent,” Smith says.

“It’s hard enough bringing in new partners and blending families, so avoiding anything that could cause tension or conflict should be avoided,” he explained.

Be comfortable being an outsider for a while.

Kids in situations like this are usually grappling with competing, confusing concerns, says Amy Begel, a family therapist in private practice in New York City and author of the blog Most Human: “Will they betray their father if they have a relationship with this new guy? Will they betray their mother if they are loyal to their father and want to protect his feelings?”

That’s why it’s important to take a backseat for a bit if you’re the new partner. It may feel like a blow to the ego to be treated as marginal, or worse, an intruder, but patience during this process is crucial, Begel says.

As Jenna Korf, a stepmom and founder of StepmomHelp.com, previously told HuffPost, you’re an outsider joining an already-formed family – even if your partner and their kids eventually move into your home.

“A lot of this is unintentional, but kids automatically go to their parent,” she says. “You might be sitting right next to your partner and they won’t address you, often leaving you out of the conversation.”

If you’re the new partner, take the approach of a new friend or neighbour, not an automatic stepparent.

New partners should try to befriend the kids, but move at a pace determined by the kids, says Ron Deal, the founder of SmartStepfamilies.com and author of a number of popular books on blended families.

“In my book with Dr. Gary Chapman, Building Love Together in Blended Families, I tell stepparents it’s like making friends with a new neighbour,” Deal says. “You don’t just push your way into their house and tell them you’re their new BFF. That makes enemies.”

Instead, the stepdad and author advised, you knock and wait patiently on the doorstep.

“You may even have to talk to them through the door for a while until you find a few things you have in common. Only when they open it can you begin to connect face to face,” Deal says. “Slowly, over time, a friendship is made that stands on its own terms.”

Meeting for the first time? Keep it casual. Think: The new Marvel movie on Disney+ and pizza at home where you get a chance to talk and get to know each other.

Avoid “erase and replace” messages if you’re the new partner

According to Deal, exaggerated gestures like Davidson’s tattoos send the wrong message to kids. The goal for new partners is to come across as additive rather than substitutive. The kids should feel like they’re potentially adding to the family, not getting a substitute dad or mum.

“Pete’s tattoo may sound romantic – that’s the kind of thing people do to win the affections of their dating partner – but to the children it declares, ‘You’re mine.’” Deal says. “Someone might say, but isn’t that great as well? Not necessarily to a child. In their world, it may seem like Pete is trying to ‘erase and replace’ their father.”

A child’s loyalty lies, understandably, with their biological parent, not the new stepparent. A message like that threatens their relationship with their father “may partially explain Kanye’s strong reaction and only escalates the battle between the parents,” Deal tells HuffPost.

“Here’s my rule of thumb: a new partner who tries to erase and replace a biological parent is, in fact, going to be erased and replaced themselves,” he says.

"As a general rule, it takes at least two years before a new partner can assume a traditional parenting role," said Virginia Gilbert, an LA-based therapist specializing in high-conflict divorce. — “As a general rule, it takes at least two years before a new partner can assume a traditional parenting role,” said Virginia Gilbert, an LA-based therapist specializing in high-conflict divorce.

Most kids with newly divorced parents are dealing with abandonment issues; don’t add to them

It’s awful for a child to get attached to a new partner who then disappears from their lives. If your partner is coming on too strong with the kids, Gilbert says to acknowledge that this is a tough transition for everyone and tell them you really appreciate their efforts.

Then, shift the conversation: Try to encourage them to see things from the kids’ perspective: Among other things, your kids may be feeling extra loyal to your ex or they may be experiencing grief that their parents are no longer together. They may not want to share you with a new person and they may not want someone to have control over changes in their lives.

“Your new partner needs to understand how overwhelming your relationship might feel to the kids and that their ambivalence is not about them,” Gilbert says. “If the issue is creating conflict between you and your new partner, consider seeing a therapist who can help you both make child-centred decisions.”

The big takeaway here, though, is to take things slow: “As a general rule, it takes at least two years before a new partner can assume any sort of traditional parenting role,” Gilbert says.

Experts Predict If And When Covid Will Become A Seasonal Illness

Posted on 14/05/2022 by Boris Clair

The vast majority of respiratory viruses that spread within our population ebb and flow with the seasons.

Influenza spikes in the winter months, as do infections caused by respiratory syncytial virus (RSV), adenoviruses and other coronaviruses. Earlier this year, Rochelle Walensky, director of the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, said she expects Covid to also become a seasonal illness – but whether or not that will come to be remains to be seen.

Most scientists agree that Covid isn’t going anywhere, and that we’ll be living with SARS-CoV-2 for decades, if not forever. Though we tend to see the biggest waves in the winter and early spring, Covid isn’t seasonal yet. It doesn’t retreat in the spring-to-summer off-season – it is smoldering throughout the year.

“Covid is steadily burning through the population as we speak. But it is also able to piggy back on top of our ebbs and flows of the typical cold and flu season, so it’s a double whammy,” Mark Cameron, an infectious disease researcher at Case Western Reserve, tells HuffPost.

Will Covid ever become a seasonal illness?

Andrew Noymer, an epidemiologist and demographer who studies infectious diseases at University of California, Irvine, expects Covid to become winter-dominant, like the flu, in the long run. SARS-CoV-2 is already somewhat seasonal and predictable in nature.

“In the United States, all of the largest spikes have been in the winter, so it is kind of seasonal in that respect,” Noymer says.

But, even between those peaks, the virus spreads at pretty significant levels. It hasn’t totally settled into a seasonality. Many epidemiologists thought Covid would have already fallen into much more of a seasonal pattern by now – but it hasn’t.

“A seasonal infectious disease is something that pops up predictably at the start of the cold and flu season and persists throughout that period of time,” Cameron says.

Keep in mind, this is only our third 12-month period with Covid. The illness is still relatively new. Even though over half of the US population and seven in 10 people in the UK have likely already had Covid, others have not and remain susceptible. We’re all antsy for the virus to become predictable, but the virus is still just getting started, Noymer says. He suspects that one day – maybe 10, 15 years from now – we’ll be looking at a very seasonal phenomenon.

There's a chance Covid may not become seasonal for years to come. — There’s a chance Covid may not become seasonal for years to come.

Is there a chance Covid may never sync up with the flu and cold season and become a winter-dominant illness? Of course, Noymer says. “I can’t absolutely rule out that it never will – that it will be the one exception that disproves the rule.”

The fact that, one, people can get Covid multiple times, and two, that even vaccinated people can catch and spread Covid, makes the epidemiology of this respiratory infection chaotic. Population-level immunity influences when waves occur. After people recover from Covid, they are typically protected from infection for a few months. As time passes, those recently recovered people can become susceptible again. And, on a greater scale, a population can become susceptible to a wave again.

This isn’t an exact science – people get infected and recover at different times. Their immunity wanes at different speeds. “There’s a lot of wheels turning and it’s very hard to predict,” Noymer says.

Here’s what causes respiratory viruses to become seasonal

It’s not entirely clear why respiratory viruses tend to get more active in the wintertime – but they do. Flu activity surges in the winter as do the common cold coronaviruses. Even measles was winter-dominant when it circulated at higher levels in the US, according to Noymer.

“We see this with respiratory virus after respiratory virus after respiratory virus,” Noymer says.

There are a few hypotheses as to why this happens. The first theory is atmospheric conditions – viruses, including influenza, tend to spread more easily when there’s less humidity. Viruses do better in drier conditions.

Another contributing factor is our behaviour. In winter months, when it’s cold outside, we gather indoors together and create plenty of opportunities for viruses to spread from person to person.

Incidentally, this is also believed to be why the US South experiences summer spikes. Contrary to those in the northeast, people living in southern states head indoors during the summer months when the temperature soars and humidity becomes wet and sticky. Schools are thought to contribute to the seasonal spread of respiratory viruses like flu and RSV, Noymer adds.

The behaviour of the virus plays a role, too. The flu, for example, tends to shoot through the population then burn itself out by “mutating to its demise,” Cameron said. Covid, on the other hand, is evolving to become more fit and more transmissible – it’s not acting like a typical respiratory virus that infects people and goes away before bursting back into the population in a different form months later.

If we look to other circulating coronaviruses that cause the common cold, we can reasonably expect Covid to eventually become endemic and more seasonal in nature, according to Cameron. But we don’t know when those coronaviruses settled in their seasonality. How long that will take with Covid is a mystery. This is wide-open territory that has yet to be studied.

“How can we understand how long Covid will take to become just another garden-variety coronavirus that is circulating and causing sporadic disease?” Cameron said. “It certainly isn’t now.”

Experts are still learning about Covid-19. The information in this story is what was known or available at the time of publication, but guidance could change as scientists discover more about the virus. To keep up to date with health advice and cases in your area, visit gov.uk/coronavirus and nhs.uk.

Junk food: Ministers to delay ban on multi-buy deals

Posted on 14/05/2022 by Boris Clair

But health groups criticise the move to pause the ban on unhealthy food offers and some advertising.