I’m not trying to stress you out here, as stress can impact your sleep, but as we age, it’s essential that we really get our sleeping habits in check. This is because how we sleep can impact how we age.
For example, experts recommend that adults go to bed no later than 1am, regardless of their circadian rhythms, to ensure healthy ageing.
So, yes, it is all a little intimidating because what are adults if not perpetually tired?
There is a simple change you can implement which will make a significant difference
According to a new study published in the aptly-named journal Sleep, having a regular sleeping pattern of going to bed and getting up at the same time every day is a stronger predictor of your mortality risk overall than sleep duration.
The research found that even people who consistently get 7–8 hours – but who had irregular sleep schedules – each night are at a higher risk of strokes, heart attacks and even cancer than those who slept less but had a consistent schedule.
Those with the most consistent sleeping patterns had up to 48% lower risks of all-cause mortality compared to those with the least consistent routines.
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The experts at BBC Science Focus warn: “Unfortunately, this doesn’t mean you can get away with sleeping only four hours a night just by sticking to a regular 3am bedtime – getting enough (but not too much) sleep still matters.
“In the study, those getting under six hours or over nine each night were at an increased risk of mortality. However, although sleep duration was still important, the link between mortality and regular sleep patterns was stronger and more consistent.”
How to get a more consistent sleeping pattern
The sleep experts at The Sleep Foundation advise: “Try to follow the same steps each night before going to bed, such as dimming the lights, quietly reading or stretching, putting on pyjamas, and brushing your teeth.
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“Over time, those actions become cues that tell your body that it is time for sleep. To promote mental tranquility, incorporate relaxation methods such as meditation, yoga, listening to soothing music, or reading.”
There’s no such thing as the perfect workplace – but if yours is far from perfect, then it may well be keeping you up at night.
It’s not always obvious, but there are plenty of signs that workplace stress is seeping into your life – with it even affecting your sleep.
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Speaking exclusively to HuffPost UK, sleep expert Martin Seeley, from MattressNextDay, walks us through five “red flag” signs that could indicate your work stress is impacting you more than you might think.
Waking at the same time in the early hours every morning suggests that cortisol levels are peaking sooner than they should be.
“When you are in a heightened state of stress throughout the day, your body will remain in that state even when it’s time to rest. If you find yourself waking at odd hours, it may be worth evaluating if the workplace is to blame,” says Seeley.
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Sleepless Sundays
We all know about the Sunday scaries – that feeling where dread sinks in on the last day of the weekend ahead of your Monday return to work.
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But if you always struggle to fall asleep on a Sunday, even when sticking to your usual sleep routine, it’s very likely to be because of work.
The Sleep Foundation polled people who said Sunday is the hardest night to fall asleep and, of these, 63.9% cited next-day worries as a key factor in their Sunday scaries and 55% of these linked their worries to their jobs.
It’s no surprise that it can impact sleep, really – the thought of returning to work after the weekend triggers a stress response in the body as the brain visualises the upcoming pressures of the working week.
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Seeley suggests that analysing whether feelings of stress gradually rise throughout the weekend is a great way to assess whether the thought of approaching a new week is impacting your wellbeing.
Workplace nightmares
Plenty of us spend most of our time at work, so it’s no surprise that, on occasion, we’ll dream about it. However, if you are dreaming of work several times a week and the dreams are more nightmarish than pleasant, it could be a warning sign that it’s impacting your overall health.
Seeley explains: “If the content of your workplace dreams are always surrounded by negativity such as missing deadlines, oversleeping, or even being fired, it suggests that workplace stress is engrained in the subconscious mind as the brain is not able to successfully disconnect from the workplace.”
Having consistent late nights: Even though you know you should go to bed earlier, you find yourself staying up late almost every night.
Feeling tired but resisting sleep: You might be exhausted, but you’re unwilling to go to bed because you want to enjoy some “me time.”
Engaging in low-value activities: You might find yourself scrolling through social media, watching mindless TV, or playing video games for hours on end.
Feeling guilty or regretful in the morning: You might wake up feeling tired and regretting your late-night choices.
“If you are staying up late and engaging in non-work-related activities, even though you know you need to wake up early, it can signal that you feel you have no or little control over your work/life balance and choose to delay sleep to recoup a sense of autonomy,” warns Seeley.
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You have a weekday sleep schedule and a weekend schedule
If you sleep for several hours throughout the weekend to counteract work week sleep deprivation, this is a “clear sign” that your job is impacting your sleep cycle, adds the sleep expert.
“This scenario is often referred to as ‘social jet lag’ and can be incredibly disruptive to your overall health,” says Seeley.
“The body favours structure, and when your weekday sleep schedule is dramatically different from your weekend sleep routine, it leads to exhaustion and decreased cognitive function.”
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What can you do about it?
It’s not always possible to just quit a job and start fresh (because time, money, job availability, etc.), so what can you do if your workplace is impacting your sleep? Seeley recommends the following:
Establish boundaries. Refrain from checking emails or working late into the evening to prevent stress from transitioning into bedtime.
Structure a nighttime routine. Take part in calming activities before bed, such as reading, meditating, or taking a warm bath, to signal to your body that it’s time to wind down.
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Maintain a consistent sleep schedule. Try to go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, even on weekends, to regulate your internal body clock.
Seek professional support. If workplace stress is leading to chronic insomnia or anxiety, consult a sleep specialist or mental health professional for guidance.
One of the biggest expenses when moving into your own home is a bed and mattress. Matresses are deeply personal purchases — finding one that fits your sleep style, your physical needs and those of your partner is a precise process — but unfortunately, it’s advised that we replace them every six to eight years.
Which frankly seems too often, given how much a good mattress costs.
However, according to Mattress expert Steve Adams, CEO of Mattress Online, there can be signs even earlier than this that your mattress needs to be replaced.
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Four signs your mattress needs to be replaced
You’re waking up feeling stiff and achy
If you start your day with stiffness or aches that fade as the day goes on, Adams warns that your mattress might be to blame.
He explains: “Over time, our body and sleep needs may change meaning the mattress that was once suitable, may not be any more, this can lead to increased pressure points and discomfort.
“Poor sleep caused by a mattress which is unsupportive and does not meet our sleep needs can even lead to longer-term health issues if left unchecked.”
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The mattress is sagging or uneven
It’s time to give your mattress a good look and ask if you can see any excessive sagging, lumps or indentations where you sleep.
According to Adams, these are signs that internal materials have broken down. He says: “Some materials will have natural settlement, such as fibres – but an extreme amount of sagging can lead to discomfort, high areas of pressure and speed up the degradation of other areas of the mattress, all which will make it harder to get a restful night’s sleep.”
Allergies are getting worse at night
Ugh, there is nothing worse.
If you have noticed that you are sneezing more often, your eyes are more itchy and sensitive or you are simply more congested when you sleep, it could be your mattress that’s to blame.
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This is because over time, mattresses accumulate dust mites, mould, and other allergens that might be triggering your symptoms.
Adams advises: “If washing your bedding and using allergy covers doesn’t help, it may be time to replace your mattress altogether.”
Your mattress is making noise
Not only is this incredibly awkward if you’re doing the deed while others are home but a noisy mattress, particularly one that creaks or squeaks from springs is a clear sign of wear and tear.
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Adams says: ” This noise suggests that the springs inside are deteriorating, compromising support and comfort. Swapping to a newer mattress with advanced materials could be the solution to both better sleep and a quieter night.”
In one of his more recent videos, the father-of-three can be seen shushing and bouncing a baby to sleep, before trialling some more, ahem, avant-garde sleep techniques.
“Go to sleep now or I’m going to set fire to this,” says the comedian, while standing next to the cot holding Ewan the sheep.
“I don’t actually want you to go to sleep,” he says in the next breath, trialling a bit of reverse psychology. “I think you should stay up all night.”
Next on the dad’s list of techniques is peer pressure. Perched casually by the side of the cot, stroking his face, he says: “So apparently all the cool babies have been getting early nights recently… Yeah, that’s just what I’ve heard.”
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Lewis also trials whale sounds, bargaining and the threat of cancelling Christmas. At one point he’s standing near the cot with a 4-pint bottle of milk.
But it’s the last tip that seems to do the trick: boring his child with chat about Bitcoin.
The 37-year-old from Manchester told HuffPost UK: “My baby isn’t sleeping at the moment so I’ve been desperately searching Instagram and TikTok for advice.
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“Once you try everything and it still doesn’t work you start resorting to crazy threats and ultimatums that a baby is obviously not going to understand.
“I thought it’d be funny to do a ‘how to’ video that isn’t particularly helpful but reflects our desperate behaviour as parents.”
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Parents dubbed the video “hilarious” and many seemed to think the Bitcoin tip – while a joke – was actually pretty genius.
There were also plenty of suggestions from others about the lengths they’d go to to get their little ones to sleep.
“I used to read books in a really boring voice, then I would fall asleep and they’d stay awake,” said user rachlbc.
“Just put a recording on of the finance review work Teams call,” added hannahlou1983.
Another commenter, nicoledanica, said the video was “spot on”. She added: “I’m a nurse and I used to give detailed lectures to my son about anatomy and physiology when he was a baby and would wake up in the middle of the night.”
“Enough with the guilt-tripping against parents who sleep train their toddler-age children,” she said. “Most times it’s needed for the entire family.
“Let’s not normalise parent and child functioning every day on sleep deprivation – because that is what’s harmful to a child’s developing brain and a parent’s mental health.”
She continued: “If you don’t do it, that’s up to you. But let’s stop putting information out there … that’s misleading parents and guilt-tripping them, because that’s just unkind.”
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What is sleep training?
The premise of sleep training is fairly simple: parents are aiming to teach their little ones to fall asleep without their help. So that means no rocking, swaying, feeding to sleep, etc.
But putting it into practice is less than simple. Often it involves a bit of trial and error and possibly some crying while your child figures out how to get themselves to sleep.
When are you meant to start sleep training?
The Sleep Foundation suggests babies aren’t ready for sleep training until they’re about six months old. This is because prior to that “they haven’t developed the circadian rhythms that will help them sleep through the night”.
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“Just as there’s no exact right age to begin sleep training, you also don’t have to sleep train,” the foundation says.
“Babies will eventually learn to sleep on their own. However, sleep training is effective and offers significant benefits to both babies and parents, with no evidence of negative long-term effects.”
There are a few different methods parents try, from the Ferber method to the fading method and the more controversial cry-it-out method.
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Here, we’ll quickly break down what they entail:
Ferber method
This involves putting your baby in their cot while they’re “drowsy but awake” and then leaving the room. If they cry, wait for three minutes (roughly) before going back in to check on them and comfort them.
The idea is that you console them but you don’t pick them up.
Then you leave the room again, this time for five minutes. And repeat. Each time you increase the amount of time you leave the room for until they’ve fallen asleep.
And if your little one wakes up in the night, the idea is you repeat the process to help settle them again.
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Laura Ohlman on Unsplash
With sleep training, parents are aiming to teach their little ones to fall asleep without their help.
Cry-it-out method
This strategy involves leaving your baby to fall asleep on their own without comforting them and then leaving them until a set time in the morning.
“Parents are instructed not to intervene and to ignore crying and tantrums unless there’s a concern that the child is ill or hurt,” according to Huckleberry.
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Fading method
This is another more gradual approach where parents camp out in the child’s room until they fall asleep. The premise is that you pop your child into their cot when they’re drowsy and then stand nearby or sit on a chair in their room, offering minimal levels of comfort, until they fall asleep.
“Each night, the parent gradually moves further away from their child while still remaining in their sight,” explains the Sleep Foundation.
Pick up/put down method
This one requires a little more patience. According to The Mother Baby Centre, parents put their baby down drowsy and if they start to then cry, you let it happen for a bit before picking them up and soothing them.
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Then you put them back down again while still awake and repeat the process until they go to sleep.
Her approach is that you do your bedtime ritual as usual, say ‘goodnight’ to your child after popping them in their cot and then leave the room.
When your child cries, take no action for two minutes. Then, go back into the bedroom and comfort them but without picking them up (this might involve lying them back down and putting your hand on their tummy while shh-ing them).
Go back out of the bedroom and then stay out for four minutes. Then repeat the exercise until your child goes to sleep.
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Is sleep training good or bad?
It’s hard to definitively answer this.
“Looking at how babies slept for most of human history (together with caretakers) we realise that sleep training today is more about suiting parental lifestyles than what’s biologically and evolutionary normal for babies,” explained science communicator Violeta Gordeljevic, on the Science for Parents Instagram account.
She advised proceeding with caution if you do try it: “When in doubt about physical and emotional safety, choose caution. This may mean choosing gentler methods.”
In a video that might put parents’ minds at ease, Professor Emily Oster recently set out to share what the research on sleep training says in an informative video.
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The CEO of ParentData, who has two children of her own, said sleep training can be a “very polarising” topic but suggested the data is “pretty good” in this area (although Gordeljevic disagrees) and came up with a summary for parents who are deliberating whether to give it a go.
“First, on average, sleep training improves the quality of infant sleep,” said Prof Oster. “It is not a panacea, it doesn’t work perfectly for every kid, but on average it improves sleep.”
Her second point is that sleep training, on average, “improves mood and happiness for parents” probably because “parents are sleeping better”.
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And her last point is that when looking at either the short-term or the long-term impact, “we do not see any differences in attachment measures, in emotional regulation, in any of the metrics you might worry about with sleep training”.
“It just does not look like sleep training makes kids worse off,” she concluded.
There’s something about dreams that feels more true and real than a daytime fantasy, isn’t there?
Maybe it’s got to do with the fact that you have no control over what you think ― and, because you’re asleep, no other stimuli to focus on when they’re happening.
All of which is to say: while I feel I shouldn’t be much affected by my dreams, I’ve been known to glare at my partner after they sinned in my slumbering mind or get emotional after seeing someone in my sleep.
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In an effort to find out why I’m so bothered by my brain’s own handiwork, I thought I’d reach out to the experts to ask what it means when you dream about someone.
HuffPost UK spoke to therapist Melissa Giuttari, who’s trained in Jungian dream analysis, psychologist Dr Leah Kaylor, and licenced sexologist Sofie Roos about the topic.
So… what does it mean?
Dr Kaylor told HuffPost UK that dreams often happen during the rapid eye movement (REM) stage of sleep, which she says is when “the brain processes emotions helping you work through the experiences of the day.”
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So, she argues, “Dreaming about someone may reflect that your brain is processing your emotions and interactions with them.” It may also have to do with the feeling you associate with that person, or what they stand for, she adds.
Guittari seems to agree, saying: “From a Jungian dream analysis perspective, we typically look at the people that show up in our dreams as symbols of different parts of ourselves (versus a literal representation of the dream character).”
She says that when someone in her practice keeps seeing someone in their dreams, she asks them to describe that person in three adjectives.
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“This begins our investigation into the unconscious meanings of the dream persona,” she explains.
For Roos, though, the nighttime appearances might be due to suppressed feelings.
“Seeing someone in your dreams often means that you think about them without really paying attention to how often you do it, or that you try to push the thoughts of them away even though they’re still there and that therefore needs to be processed in your dreams,” she suggested.
The sexologist says it can be “a common indicator that you’re actually really into them, even though you many times don’t want to admit it for your awake self.”
Does dreaming about someone mean anything about my relationship with them?
According to all three experts, the resounding answer is an absolute “maybe.”
Dr Kaylor commented: “Dreams have the potential to act like a mirror, reflecting your subconscious thoughts about the person or your relationship, even if you’re not fully aware of them.”
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But she continued, “It may also be less about the person and more about your emotional connection—your brain uses dreams to work through feelings or situations involving them.”
Guittari, meanwhile, sees nighttime cameos as a way to “uncover latent desires, wish fulfilment, or repressed fears, anxieties or conflicts of the dreamer’s psyche” ― a “way of the unconscious trying to bring messages and awareness to the conscious self.”
Roos, on the other hand, says “there’s often no better matchmaker than your [unsoncious] self when letting everything come to you without prejudice or filters.”
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If you’re “often seeing the very same person in your dreams, especially in romantic or sexual contexts,” there may be more to the connection, the sexologist suggests.
Still, Dr Kaylor says you should see dreams, including those about people you know as more of an ”‘emotional detox’ that leaves you mentally refreshed and ready to face new challenges” than as revelatory truth-tellers.
So if you’re worried about how you saw someone in your sleep, don’t be ― though they “serve an important purpose,” dreams have more to do with processing your emotions and “helping you make sense of your daily experiences” than they do setting you up with your soulmate, she says.
As a former cleaner, I notice the little details (like polished taps and doorknobs, or truly streak-free windows) that show an expert level of cleaning.
You don’t have to be a cleaner to meet those standards; I’ve even had clients whose homes were pro-looking spick and span before I turned up.
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Even in those houses, however, an important part of the bedroom was almost always ignored.
Freddie Garnham, Lighting Design Engineer at Dyson, shared that “unseen dust mites, allergens and dust contribute to an unhygienic environment” in our sleeping space in one neglected area in particular.
Which is?
People, you are meant to vacuum your mattress.
It makes sense when you think about it ― you may already vacuum your sofa, but for some reason, mattresses always seem to evade deep cleans.
That’s not a great idea, Garnham says.
“Regularly vacuuming your mattress will ensure a cleaner and more hygienic sleeping environment and a sleep undisturbed by allergies,” he said.
“While the frequency will depend on the mattress itself, it is recommended to be cleaned every six months with bedding changed once a week to keep dust and allergens at bay.”
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He’s not alone. Speaking to Ideal Homes, Jane Wilson, manager of Fantastic Cleaners, said: “Regular vacuuming of your mattress can help remove allergens, dust mites, and dirt, contributing to a cleaner and more hygienic sleeping environment.”
She added,“It’s generally safe and beneficial for most types of mattresses. This includes mattresses with materials such as foam, latex, innerspring, hybrid, and memory foam.”
How should I vacuum my mattress?
The good news is that you don’t need a specially designed tool for the task: a plain old Henry or other vacuum will do.
Mattress Online says you should get the nozzle on the bed part and begin “using small circular motions over the entire mattress to make sure you lift all of the dust, dirt, hair and dead skin.
“If you have one, you can also use an upholstery attachment to make vacuuming a little easier, but it’s not essential.”
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Once you’ve tried it, we can almost guarantee you’ll never go back.
If you struggle to get, or stay, asleep, you might wonder what’s “normal” and what’s genuinely worth worrying about.
The NHS says “A few sleepless nights are usually nothing to worry about, but it can become an issue if a lack of sleep starts to affect your daily life.”
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But where exactly is that line meant to be drawn?
Well, according to healthcare provider Mayo Clinic, noticing one dangerous tendency during the day (rather than at night) can be a giveaway.
Which is?
If you’re finding yourself nodding off during important moments of your day, it’s possible you have a sleep disorder, Mayo Clinic says.
“Being very sleepy during the daytime” is a common sign, they write.
“You may fall asleep at times that aren’t typical, such as while driving or while working at your desk.”
The NHS adds that you may also have longer-term sleep issues if you:
find it difficult to fall asleep
lie awake for long periods at night
wake up several times during the night
wake up early and be unable to get back to sleep
feel down or have a lower mood
have difficulty concentrating
be more irritable than usual.
“Longer-term sleep problems can affect our relationships and social life, and leave us feeling tired all the time, eating more and not able to do daily tasks,” they add.
What are some common sleep disorders?
Insomnia, sleep apnoea (where you stop breathing for short periods of time throughout the night), restless leg syndrome, night terrors, sleepwalking, and even snoring can all disrupt a good night’s sleep.
“But talk with your doctor or other healthcare professional if you regularly have trouble getting enough sleep, if you don’t feel rested when you wake up or if you feel overly sleepy during the day.”
It’s happened again; this morning, I missed my pre-work gym session because I hadn’t gotten enough sleep.
Despite my strict 9:30 pm bedtime, I regularly fail to get my full eight hours in ― like many of us, I find going to bed and falling asleep two completely different challenges, with the latter behind much harder.
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If you also struggle to snooze, though, there may be hope: the University of Minnesota says the “Military Sleep Method” can help you nod off far faster.
One fan of the method said it cut their falling asleep time down to two measly minutes.
“You lie on your back, being still, and intentionally relax each muscle group, one at a time, while focusing on slow, calming breaths,” they say.
That includes your eyelids, tongue, jaw, and more ― make sure your sleep “scan” is thorough.
You should move from the top of your head to the bottom of your toes, imagining yourself sinking into the bed the entire time.
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After that, the Sleep Foundation says you should clear your mind for ten seconds, imagining something soothing like rolling hills or lying in a treehouse in a forest.
If you can’t clear your mind, don’t fight your thoughts, they add; just let them float into and out of your head.
UMN says that what you do before sleep matters too ― overstimulating yourself or getting too distracted won’t help, they suggest.
Military service isn’t exactly conducive to a good night’s sleep, they say, so the “military sleep method was used by World War II soldiers to fall asleep within two minutes.”
It was later “popularized in the [1981] book Relax and Win: Championship Performance,”they add (for some reason, a copy of that book is going for over £200 on Amazon).
US Love Is Blind fans will know that Stephen Richardson’s fallout with fiancee Monica Davis involved scandal, sex, and… a sleep test.
Among other shady behaviour, the most recent episode of American Love Is Blind saw Monica finding sexts to another woman on Stephen’s phone that were sent while he was engaged to her.
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He said of the event, “I did make a completely stupid mistake while being drunk at a sleep test with somebody who texted me.”
We don’t know if he was actually doing a sleep test at the time, and his actions were obviously slimy regardless.
But if you’re anything like us, you might be wondering what a sleep test even is ― and it turns out it can be a pretty useful tool (that said, the secret to a truly seamless sleep is a clear conscience).
What’s a sleep test?
According to healthcare provider Cleveland Clinic’s site, a sleep test, or sleep study, is officially known as a polysomnogram.
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It’s a “diagnostic test that tracks and records how multiple body systems work while you’re asleep,” they say. It’s used to diagnose sleep disorders.
It tracks things like your heart brain, and respiratory system as you sleep. It can be used to spot things like insomnia, sleepwalking, and sleep paralysis.
Sleep studies are “similar” to an oximetry test, which “involves wearing an oxygen monitor on a finger during sleep and can often be done at home.”
The NHS says these can be helpful if you have signs of sleep apnoea.
When you’re awake, symptoms of sleep apnoea may show up if you:
feel very tired
find it hard to concentrate
have mood swings
have a headache when you wake up.
At night, your partner may notice your:
breathing stopping and starting
making gasping, snorting or choking noises
waking up a lot
loud snoring.
What if I want one of these tests?
If you’re worried about your sleep habits, your doctor may refer you to specialist clinics which can facilitate sleep investigations.
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Studies range from heart monitoring options (a respiratory polygraph) to inpatient observation and movement monitors (actigraphy).
Inpatient observations are the “polysomnograms” we mentioned earlier.
For what it’s worth, sleep studies usually ask participants not to drink ahead of the exam, or to only have as much as you usually do.