Gavin & Stacey: 19 Behind-The-Scenes Secrets You Didn’t Know About The 2008 Christmas Special

There’s a reason why the original Gavin & Stacey Christmas episode is consistently hailed as one of the best festive TV specials ever made – it is a masterpiece, as we’ve previously written ourselves.

The episode, which sees the West and the Shipmans come together for their first Christmas as an extended family, originally pulled in more than 7 million viewers when it first aired on Christmas Eve back in 2008.

Here we share the behind-the-scenes secrets even the biggest fans might not even know about…

1. The special was filmed in October 2008 over 12 days in and around Barry, leaving the team just two months to edit it until it was on TV.

2. It was conceived after writers and creators Ruth Jones and James Corden didn’t have time to do a whole new series, but could fit in making a special.

The episode was filmed just over two months before it aired
The episode was filmed just over two months before it aired

3. They had also been fascinated with the idea of bringing together the Shipmans and the Wests for Christmas, and the chance to explore different festive foibles.

4. Many of the cast fell sick with flu during filming, according to a 2017 interview Ruth Jones (Nessa) gave to Radio Times, and there was an on-set doctor.

Filming of the 2008 Gavin and Stacey Christmas Special
Filming of the 2008 Gavin and Stacey Christmas Special

5. The first scene that the cast and crew filmed was the one where Smithy visits Stacey at work to ask her to help him with his Christmas shopping.

6. The scene was shot at the Culverhouse Cross Marks & Spencer, which is located just outside Cardiff – despite the store being set in Essex.

7. James (Smithy) admitted he hadn’t learned his lines properly before starting the shoot, and also had fun wheeling Joanna Page (Stacey) around in shopping crates in between takes.

Joanna Page and James Corden in between takes
Joanna Page and James Corden in between takes

8. Another location you might have spotted in the special is the Welcome Break at Cardiff Gate, where the Barry lot stop off en route to Essex.

9. The baby who played Neil was sick all over Melanie Walters (Gwen) while filming on location at the services.

10. James wasn’t driving Smithy’s car in the scene where he’s singing Do They Know It’s Christmas down the phone with Gavin – the crew used what’s called a low loader, which essentially tows the car.

Smithy's car on the low-loader
Smithy’s car on the low-loader

11. Mathew Horne (Gavin) was sat in the back of the low loader while James was filming his parts of the scene, and sang along down a microphone so that James could hear him in the car. He then filmed his turn as Gavin in the scene separately.

12. The child who visited Nessa’s grotto was played by Ruth’s real-life nephew, Zakk.

Ruth Jones with her real-life nephew
Ruth Jones with her real-life nephew

13. Mathew ripped his trousers while filming the scene where Gavin and Stacey come home on Christmas Eve.

14. The Christmas Eve fight scene struck fear into the director because it featured all 12 characters, and Ruth admitted she had to give him a warning after writing it.

15. The Christmas dinner the gang all tuck into was actually cooked on-location in Pam and Mick’s real-life kitchen, Ruth revealed to Radio Times in 2017.

The Shipmans and the Wests spent their first Christmas together
The Shipmans and the Wests spent their first Christmas together

16. The mammoth scene was filmed on the penultimate day of the 12-day shoot, with press and promotional pictures also being taken in the house in between takes.

17. James was also caught taking naps on the Shipmans’ living room sofa during his downtime, where Juila Davis (Dawn) drew on his face.

James Corden asleep on the sofa
James Corden asleep on the sofa

18. The final scene to be filmed on the last day of the shoot was the unwrapping of the presents, with Dave’s proposal to Nessa being the final shot in the can.

19. There was a feeling from James that the cast would “never make another Christmas special again” – but thankfully, that proved not to be the case, when in 2019, a follow-up finally arrived…

The Gavin & Stacey 2008 Christmas Special is available to watch on BBC iPlayer. You can also purchase behind-the-scenes documentary Gavin & Stacey: 12 Days Of Christmas on iTunes and Amazon Prime Video.

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My Christmas Doesn’t Look Like Your Christmas

With our quirks and personal traditions, no two Christmases are the same. And – at the risk of sounding like a cheesy Christmas ad – that’s what makes the holidays so special.

Ahead of this year’s festivities, we asked readers across the country to share what they’ll be doing come Christmas day.

Some of you are heading to church, others to the pool. Some are looking forward to family time, others will kick back with friends – or cats. And the food? If you’re uninspired by traditional turkey fare, how does cottage pie, chicken Kyiv, or a Zimbabwean feast sound?

However you’re spending the day, have a happy one.

‘I’m a working Santa, Christmas is my day off’

Michael Facherty, who’s 71 and based in Caversham, and has played the role of Father Christmas for nearly 40 years. On December 25th he’ll be having a well-deserved break.

Michael Facherty

“In the run up to Christmas a working Santa has many jobs. Among them is recording videos for clients, this year including a charity pop single, various corporate jobs including parties, and grottos. My favourite this year was being Santa on Hobbs of Henley Santa Cruises. Work with individual families includes Zoom calls and home visits.

“I often have a charity visit on Christmas Day but not this year, so I’ll have a lie in. The day starts with some presents and then I have my special Christmas lunch. My wife and son are vegans, but Matt makes me cottage pie with steak mince as a special treat. I’ll watch the Richard Attenborough version of Miracle on 34th Street at some point during the day. Boxing Day is my favourite day, because our grandchildren visit us.”

‘My British friends are now family.’

Nishtha Goel, the founder of sustainable brand Unnaaty, is 32 and based in London. She’ll be spending her fourth Christmas in the UK with friends, who she calls her “chosen family”.

Nishtha Goel

“I am from India and have been living in the UK since 2018. I don’t have any family here, but have found a friend who is my chosen family and since 2019 it is has become a tradition that I spend Christmas at her place, with a few other friends. What could have been a lonely day is not, because my British friends are now family.

“I am a vegetarian so, while my friends enjoy turkey, they are thoughtful enough to cook a separate vegetarian meal for me, which includes vegetarian stuffing, peas, carrots, Brussel sprouts, to name a few things. I enjoy every bit of the traditional Christmas dinner, it is such a beautiful way of bringing families together.

“My favourite part of the day is late evening, when we play silly board/card games and just have a relaxed time with each other, full of smiles and laughter.”

‘It is my favourite park run of the year.’

Robin Barwick, aged 50, is the event director Royal Tunbridge Wells parkrun. On Christmas day he’ll be helping 200-300 runners start the day in high spirits.

Robin Barwick

“I will be run director at RTW parkrun this Christmas morning, for what has become one of our best attended fixtures. It is my favourite parkrun of the year.
Between 200 and 300 runners and walkers are likely to show up for our 9am start, along with around 35 volunteers.

“Christmas morning parkruns have a special atmosphere. Many come in
festive fancy dress, with anything from reindeer headbands, elf costumes, the full Father Christmas outfit or maybe a Christmas tree disguise.

“Runners can take the 5k run competitively if they want to but on Christmas Day most people treat it as an opportunity to get some fresh air and exercise with friends and family without worrying about their finish time. It is a very social occasion and as our cafe in Dunorlan Park will be closed many will bring their own refreshments to enjoy after their run. They are not always alcohol-free.”

‘I’ll sleep the whole way through Christmas day’

Marlene Bayuga, 59, lives in Morden, Surrey and works as a Marie Curie healthcare assistant in the community covering Southwest London and sometimes Kent.

Healthcare assistant Marlene Bayuga.

Marie Curie

Healthcare assistant Marlene Bayuga.

“This Christmas I will be working throughout the night from 10pm until 7am. On Christmas day I will sleep during the daytime, and I will go for Christmas supper at my brother’s house, where we have roast turkey with all the trimmings. Then I will leave at 9pm to go to work and I will bring a mince pie and some Christmas pudding with me!

“When I arrive to my patients’ house I greet them with Christmas greetings and reassure their family that their loved one will be cared for, monitored, and supported during the night so that they can have a restful sleep. It can reassure them to know that someone is there with their loved one, so they won’t be alone overnight.

“I work during Christmas because someone in the community will always need my care at the end of their life, and because everyone deserves to have a good end of life experiences, both patients and their families. My family completely support and understand this. I know I’m there to give light during what can be a really difficult time for them.”

‘We go to church to celebrate Jesus’ birthday’

Nicole Bateman, 34 from Bournemouth, is a mum of two, author and owner of A Box Full of Joy. She’ll be celebrating Christmas by attending church and spending time with her family.

Nicole Bateman

“We start the day with the kids coming into our bed to open their stockings, then we have gammon and eggs with orange juice for breakfast and then open our presents under the Christmas tree.

“We then go to our church to celebrate Jesus’ birthday and then head over to grandparents for Christmas lunch, then a walk after that.

“I have a daughter who is three and a son who is six, and my son has epilepsy. He was diagnosed in July 2020 and has yet to find a medication to control his seizures. Last Christmas, he had five seizures over the four-day period, so by keeping to familiar things (like waking up at our house and going to our church like we do on a normal Sunday) it keeps some routine and stability to the day, which hopefully limits seizures.

“Christmas time can sometimes cause sensory overload and seizures for our boy, so we have to get the balance between too exciting (excitement is one of his seizure triggers) but then still making it a fun day.”

‘I’m solo cat-sitting – and I can’t wait’

Charlotte Lingard, who’s 34 and based in Kent, is looking forward to spending Christmas with some feline friends.

Charlotte Lingard and two of the cats she's looked after this year.

Charlotte Lingard

Charlotte Lingard and two of the cats she’s looked after this year.

“I will be cat-sitting a cat called Lola in Blackheath over Christmas for a couple who are abroad for the Christmas holidays.

“I plan to spend my day eating all the festive party foods I enjoy, cuddling Lola and making sure she is spoiled; also exploring Blackheath and Greenwich, as it is not an area of London I am familiar with, but I have heard a lot of nice things about it.

“I have been doing cat-sitting on and off for nearly a year now. It started when my flat did not allow pets, and I was missing feline company whilst working remotely. I use two websites to find and apply for cat sits, I have had five star reviews so far.

“I am completely happy in my own company, so I am looking forward to it!”

‘I swim then cook the kids’ favourite: Chicken Kyiv’

Sue Bordley, who’s 51 and from the Wirral, writes swimming-related books and will be heading the pool for her daily dip on Christmas morning.

Sue Bordley

“On Christmas Day, I’ll get up at about 7.15 am and have a quick coffee before heading to the pool, which opens at 8am that day. It’s always nice to have a chat to Julie, Paula and Harry, my fellow die-hard swimmers who are there every morning.

“I’ll swim for an hour. Swimming got me over a breakdown six years ago. It’s my release, my lifeline – why on earth would I not want to have that on the day that’s supposed to be the best of the year?

“After my hour’s swim and a lovely relaxation boost in the hot tubs, I go home to spend the day with my husband Mark (48) and sons, Jack and Olly (15 and 12).

“While the boys play their new computer games, I prepare a (reasonably) traditional Christmas meal: I make the usual roast potatoes and vegetables, but we don’t have turkey, choosing roast pork instead and the boys are allowed to have their favourite Chicken Kyiv. At Christmas, everyone should have what they like – and it’s only one more dish to wash.”

‘I’m setting my own solo Christmas traditions’

Patience M. Chigodora, a 30-year-old spiritual life coach from Nottingham, is using Christmas to have some me-time.

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“This year I’m doing things differently. My Christmas isn’t about being with family and friends; it’s about me. I actually want to rest, recover and feel replenished in the New Year which honestly last year I didn’t after spending a lot of my time travelling around the UK to be with family and friends.

“I am planning a few days filled with candle-lit baths, PJs, feasting on all my favourite Zimbabwean and English infused dishes paired with my fave red wine of course. Binging on my favourite Christmas movies and series (like How to Ruin Christmas series on Netflix), I might pop to the cinema to watch the new Avatar movie, go on walks and I’m allowing freedom for spontaneity and going with the flow.

“It’s really important to me this year that I celebrate Christmas how I want to – not how I am expected to. I will be seeing family and friends here and there, focusing on quality time rather than quantity, but 80% of the period, including New Year, will be spent basking within my inner-verse.”

‘We Zoom our families and celebrate online’

Viva O’Flynn, who’s 40 and based in Gloucester, enjoys spending a cosy Christmas at home with her husband, John. They’ll spend the afternoon on Zoom, celebrating with family abroad.

Viva O’Flynn and her husband, John.

Viva O’Flynn

Viva O’Flynn and her husband, John.

“Christmas Day starts with me waking up next to my husband, John. He cooks brunch for us, eggs florentine or eggs Benedict with salmon. Then, we head to our Christmas tree to open presents. I open each gift with a kiss, a ‘thank you’ and ‘I love you’. He does the same.

“It’s just the two of us celebrating Christmas in person, because his family are in Ireland, mine are in the Philippines. We log into Zoom and say our Christmas greetings to them, and we play some games with them online. Some of my cousins even sing Christmas tunes.

“There is nothing like being with family to celebrate in person: hugging them, kissing them on the cheek, holding their hands, eating meals with them. But it is the pandemic and flu season, and flights back home are doubly expensive. We’ll wait until after the holidays to reunite with them in person. The next best thing is seeing them, hearing their voices, and celebrating Christmas with them virtually.”

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This Baby Perfectly Embodies Our Excitement For Christmas Dinner

A hilarious video of a baby getting ridiculously excited about being fed is basically all of us ahead of our Christmas dinner.

In the clip, baby Milly pulls a face that can only be described as equal parts shocked, terrified and excited as she anticipates spoonfuls of chocolate pudding.

Milly was just nine months old when her mum, Sandra Karlsson Elfsten, decided to film her response to the delicious treat.

“She truly loved it,” the mum-of-three, who lives in Molkom, Sweden, tells HuffPost UK.

“She does that face when she gets excited over things.

“She actually does it even now [she’s five] – not exactly like in the video, but she gets excited with all her body.”

Karlsson Elfsten originally shared the video of baby Milly on Instagram in 2018, however it was recently resurfaced by another account – and we felt it was too good not to share.

Thank you Milly (and Sandra) for bringing us even more joy today.

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Here’s How Christmas Eve Dinner Looks All Around The World

While many familiar Christmas traditions originated in Western countries, people from all around the world and from different cultural backgrounds celebrate the holiday with the same spirit of gratitude and togetherness. No matter where, recipes passed on through generations are central to family gatherings. From callaloo to chicken tikka masala, find out what renowned chefs and food influencers around the world are cooking on Christmas Eve.

Mexico

Martha Ortiz Chapa is the head chef at Tuch de Luna at La Casa de la Playa in Riviera Maya. She was the chef-owner of Dulce Patria, which had been named one of the 50 best restaurants in Latin America and the best restaurant in Mexico City before closing earlier in the Covid-19 pandemic. She has also served as a judge on “Top Chef Mexico,” and in 2020 was named one of the 40 best chefs in the world.

Martha Ortiz and her turkey in mole.

Courtesy of Martha Ortiz

Martha Ortiz and her turkey in mole.

Our December traditions begin with the Posadas (a religious festival held from Dec. 16-24), which lead the way to the grand celebration of Christmas Eve. During this time, Mexicans hang seven-point-star piñatas (the peaks representing a different capital sin, including gluttony) made with contrasting coloured tissue paper and filled with pieces of sugar cane, tejocotes (a fruit), orange wedges, peanuts, candies and sugar-coated almonds. We blindfold the guests, who take turns hitting the piñata until someone breaks it, in celebration of the predominance of virtue and abundance.

On Noche Buena (the night that is good), aka Christmas Eve, I elegantly present these crafts to my guests. I usually use a dark tablecloth as a canvas and decorate it with wooden kitchen utensils, such as grinders, spoons and saucepans, surrounded by colourful flowers. I personalise each guest’s place on their plate with a small piñata, which holds inside a traditional sweet or piece of candy and a message of friendship and love, in the hope that they will take it home with them and, when they break it, the abundance of affection, bonds and the celebration of life will grow.

As a proud Mexican, I begin with traditional dishes such as romeritos (tender sprigs of seepweed) with cactus strips, and mole (made with at least 50 ingredients) seasoned with dried shrimp. I serve a salad called Noche Buena, which is prepared with diced jicama, apple, beet, orange wedges and crunchy peanuts. For main, we have pork leg in spicy pulque marinade. I wash it down with my personal favourite, a punch of tejocotes, tamarind, jicama pieces, piloncillo (a raw form of pure cane sugar), guavas and spices and a touch of hard liquor.

I add the leftover punch to the mother sauce to prepare a fruity mole and serve it with turkey pieces that have a crackling-like crunchy skin. And, if there’s some left over, I make a delicate cheesecake to remember all the flavour of the Posadas days.

With this celebration of classic and modern dishes, I honour my grandmother’s cooking and think about the great wealth of ingredients from Mexico. This is how, surrounded with piñatas and sweet smiles, I wish that each Christmas Eve will become an early memory of tradition, lineage, and my pride of being a female Latin, Mexican chef.

St. Thomas, U.S. Virgin Islands

Julius “The Chef” Jackson is a professional chef, Olympian boxer, community leader and author of the cookbook “My Modern Caribbean Kitchen: 70 Fresh Takes on Island Favourites.” He currently offers private interactive culinary social events through “The Chef’s Cooking Lab” and is the head chef and manager at the nonprofit My Brother’s Workshop Bakery and Café in St. Thomas.

Julius Jackson and his Christmas Eve roast pork.

Courtesy of Julius Jackson

Julius Jackson and his Christmas Eve roast pork.

We have such a melting pot of cultures in the Virgin Islands that we have created our unique mashup. You can see this to be true in the way we celebrate the Christmas season.

It’s very traditional for us to have callaloo as a starter for the Christmas Eve meal. This stew made from okra, spinach and pork is influenced by African cuisine. My personal favourite is the seafood version, which I make with shrimp, conch, lobster and saltfish. The warm green goodness gives me the feeling of the Christmas season on a tropical island.

I also love roasting pork for our Christmas Eve or Christmas Day dinners. This dish came about from our Puerto Rican brothers and sisters that migrated to the U.S. Virgin Islands, and we adapted it within our culture. I generously rub the butt, shoulder or the whole pig down with seasonings and cloves, make incisions into the skin to allow the seasonings to penetrate inside the meat and under the skin. Then, I roast the pork for 5-6 hours until the skin is super crispy. This is one of my all-time favourites dishes because I love the tender and salty meat with the crispy skin.

The guavaberry fruit has also become a major part of our tradition here in the Virgin Islands. The slightly sweet- and tart-tasting fruit that looks like red and purple blueberry comes from our West Indian neighbours. During Christmas time, we consume guavaberry rum or incorporate it into desserts, such as homemade guavaberry tart and guavaberry cheesecake.

After dinner, we carol calypso/quelbe Christmas tunes at home and around our neighbourhood, stopping at homes of friends and family members for snacks and rum.

India

Vikas Khanna is an Indian American chef, restaurateur, cookbook author, filmmaker and humanitarian. He grew up in Amritsar, India, served as a judge on “MasterChef India” and received a Michelin star for six consecutive years for his New York restaurant Junoon. He has authored over two dozen books and directed and produced several films.

Vikas Khanna makes paneer tikka masala for Christmas Eve, but in a smaller appetizer form.

Courtesy of Vikas Khanna

Vikas Khanna makes paneer tikka masala for Christmas Eve, but in a smaller appetizer form.

Christmas Eve is celebrated in India with as much fervor as all other religious festivals, especially more so in the northern state of Punjab, where I hail from. For us Punjabis, it is one more occasion to celebrate and feast on good food.

We usually plan an elaborate dinner with near and dear ones (which in Punjab can be a lot of people). My special guests on Christmas Eve are all the elderly grandparents who I look forward to cooking for. Most of the dishes I cook are keeping in mind their palate and preferences, so it’s an Indian-style Christmas dinner. It is also my way of expressing my gratitude towards my grandmother, who was my first culinary teacher.

December yields some of the best farm produce, giving me an array of choices of ingredients. The weather in Punjab is cold this time of the year, so the dishes are served warm and spicy.

I make several dishes using paneer (Indian cottage cheese), because paneer and Punjabis are made for each other. We are a dairy-rich state! So, I make paneer tikka masala for appetisers, stuffed paneer paratha, paneer and mixed vegetables, and a curry. For the meat eaters, I make a chicken version of the same dishes.

Also, instead of the popular regional Punjabi dish, chole bhature, which is served at most festive occasions, I prefer making bo wale kulche, which non-Amritsaris find smelly because the dough is double-fermented, but I find them aromatic and absolutely relish them. Some of these recipes are in my book, “Amritsar — Flavours of the Golden City.”

After a hearty dinner and loads of friendly conversations, it’s time for desserts. The one dessert that is mandatory at my Christmas Eve dinner is whipped fruit cream with fresh seasonal fruits. It reminds me of my childhood when my grandparents would take me and my siblings out for this treat. Making the same dish for my special guests feels like completing the circle.

The happy faces of my guests, especially the grandparents, fill my heart with joy and energise me for the new year ahead.

France

Herve Palmieri (who goes by Hervé Cuisine) is a Paris-based videographer, food blogger and author of “Easy and Amazing Desserts” and “Easy Aperitifs With Friends.” His YouTube channel featuring cooking tutorials has over 1 million subscribers.

Herve Palmieri with a Black Forest cake, and French onion soups like the ones he makes on Christmas Eve.

Courtesy of Herve Palmieri

Herve Palmieri with a Black Forest cake, and French onion soups like the ones he makes on Christmas Eve.

The first thing that comes to mind when I think about Christmas Eve is my family. We all live in Provence in the southeastern part of France. I have one son, two sisters and six nephews and nieces. In France, Christmas is a very special time when families come together, forget, forgive and give. We always try to get together on Christmas Eve, taking turns to either host or rent a place in the Alps or in the national park of Queyras.

Everyone participates with the Christmas Eve meal planning. The kids help prepare puff pastry treats for appetisers that we cut out in Christmas tree shapes and fill with cheese, nuts, honey and raisins. They also like making tapenade (olive paste that’s popular in Provence) and goat cheese mix. Then, we display everything on the table like a buffet so everyone can taste a bit of everything.

Traditionally, we also serve some poultry and several sides. For instance, we would include grilled veggies like glazed carrots and sprouts, pureed parsnips or sweet potatoes with spices. For dessert, we have a tradition to serve two cakes: Black Forest, that I’ve been doing according to my mom’s recipe for years probably since I was 10 years old, and a buche, which is a more traditional recipe often made with chestnut puree and chocolate (or you can make it more exotic with mangoes and coconut).

Both of my parents, who come from Vietnamese and Italian origins, my sisters and I, love to cook or bake. So, for Christmas lunch, we prepare Vietnamese fried spring rolls, a recipe my grandfather passed on to my mother when she was a young girl and needed to help prepare the meals for her family of six children. For Christmas Day dinner, we usually make a typical French onion soup made with yellow or white onions, olive oil, vegetable broth and a crust of melted cheese and croutons with herbs like thyme and rosemary. It is very simple, tasty and supposed to help you cleanse your body after a heavy meal.

Christmas Eve is not all about eating, though. We like to play some group games, like the Wolf, which is a strategy game opposing wolves and villagers that you play in a circle in dim light, even though my father always falls asleep before the end of the game! We also go for a late walk outside in the little village in the Alps called Aiguilles en Queyras, even if it’s freezing, because you know, we do eat more than usual on that night.

Uganda

Sophia Musoki is a Ugandan food writer and food photographer. She is author of “A Kitchen in Uganda,” one of the most notable food blogs in the country, and three e-books, one of which received a Gourmand World Cookbook Award. Musoki also produces and hosts the podcast “Our Food Stories” where Ugandans share food stories.

Sophia Musoki and her Ugandan fried potatoes.

Courtesy of Sophia Musoki

Sophia Musoki and her Ugandan fried potatoes.

For my family, Christmas Eve is a time when everyone arrives at my grandparents’ home in Kasese, in western Uganda, from various parts of the country to end the year together. Their home is situated on the edge of one of the many Rwenzori ranges with a dizzying but scenic view. Banana and coffee tree plantations surround the house, giving it a lush green backdrop for our African Christmas.

Christmas Eve is more of a preparation day for me and my family. We have 15-20 people crammed in the small kitchen, which is located about 5 meters away from the main house. Each of us has an assigned task. Older male relatives set up a corner to slaughter a mature goat for the meal, while the female relatives peel potatoes, bananas and yams. In another corner of the kitchen, my cousins, nieces and nephews shell fresh beans to make soup, using beans my aunts bring from either their gardens or the market. I love getting involved in the chopping, cutting, cleaning and slicing of all the condiments like tomatoes, onions, local garlic and garden eggs.

While everyone is busy, my grandmother puts on a big pot of green banana and black beans katogo (a stew of starch and a protein pottage) on fire to simmer for the evening meal.

On Christmas Eve, we also spend some time selecting cookware, such as heavy cast-iron pots for steaming and clay pots for stewing meat and boiling beans. If we don’t have enough, we either go out to the market and purchase some or borrow from generous neighbours.

Aside from cooking, this is also a time for the family to share good news, like the birth of a child, graduation, a wedding anniversary or a baptism. This cheerful atmosphere is filled with children playing hide and seek, which is more fun to do at night and among many people. The adults tell stories of their travels while neighbours drop by occasionally to join in on the conversation. We generally serve visitors fresh fruits. My favourite part of Christmas Eve is the camaraderie of the meal preparation. As we roll into the evening, we leisurely peel, slice and eat fruits like mangoes, sugar cane and jackfruit, which I believe “takes a village” to do. This keeps us occupied until the katogo is served on large shared trays, which is often very late into the night.

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8 Things Therapists Do To Handle Stress Over Christmas

There’s no doubt that the festive season can be a stressful time, amid all the travel plans, family visits and present shopping.

These activities often involve an array of demands that take a toll on your mental health, such as cleaning, cooking and spending. So it’s totally OK to experience stress or anxiety among the festivities; even mental health professionals – who may seem like they have it all together – aren’t immune to these feelings.

HuffPost asked therapists for insight on how they feel joy and cheer amid the stress of the season. Here are their personal tips for decompressing and relaxing:

They set aside time for themselves

The festive season can be a busy time, especially if you are surrounded by friends and family. It’s normal to feel stressed and anxious about meeting up with people or hanging with relatives.

“I always make sure I set aside some time for myself to relax during the holidays and focus on my wellness needs,” says Michael Klinkner, a licensed clinical social worker in Arizona.

They scribble a few thoughts in a journal

Minerva Guerrero, a therapist who founded Mind Matters Mental Health Counseling in New York, says she often takes a journaling break to intentionally ground herself.

“I like to journal to get clear on what I’m hoping the holidays bring me and how I feel during this time,” she says. “This self-care activity really helps me destress and relax during the holiday season.”

They listen to music

Music therapy can evoke feelings of calmness and relaxation.

“I often create soothing and hype-me-up playlists, which help me move through my feelings,” says Naiylah Warren, a therapist and clinical content manager with mental health platform Real.

They focus on holiday events that give them joy

During one of the busiest times of the year, it’s important to set boundaries to take care of your mental health and wellbeing.

“I generally check in with myself in regards to what traditions or gatherings feel stressful to me and which ones bring me joy,” says Kama Hurley, a clinical counsellor and life coach in Idaho. “I prioritise what I love to do and say no to the things that make me feel anxious.”

Even therapists need some coping strategies to get through the holidays.

LordHenriVoton via Getty Images

Even therapists need some coping strategies to get through the holidays.

They make a self-care list

Hurley says she writes a self-care list when she’s anxious or stressed, as it gives her agency and lifts her mood.

“I write down activities that help me relax and make me feel good about myself that I can accomplish when feeling the intense emotions,” she says.

Having a go-to list that you can reference and change will help you identify which activities are sources of joy.

Madeline Lucas, another therapist and clinical content manager at Real, shared some self-care activities that help her feel less isolated in her holiday stress: taking long showers with music, applying sheet face masks, going on walks and stretching.

They sit in stillness for a few minutes

The art of meditation can be powerful in achieving a sense of calm and balance.

“I practise meditation exercises for a few minutes whenever I feel stressed,” says Regine Muradian, a clinical psychologist in California. When you feel that stress starting to creep up on you, take a moment to inhale deeply and focus on your breathing.

They plan ahead

Israa Nasir, a therapist who founded the mental wellness brand Well.Guide, said she plans ahead for the festive season, which helps her destress. “I make sure to take care of any client and associated work-related obligations fully when I take time off during the holidays,” she says.

Planning a schedule before you get too busy may feel comforting as it offers a sense of routine, with many decisions already made in advance.

They talk to their therapist

Many mental health professionals get help from therapists of their own to manage stress. If you feel that stress is inhibiting your ability to get through the day, consider connecting with a mental health professional now.

“If I anticipate a lot of stress prior to the holiday season, I’ll schedule a few extra sessions with my own therapist before they go on their holiday break to help process the feelings I’m having,” Nasir says.

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8 Festive Dishes With A Twist For The Tastiest Christmas Dinner Ever

The big Christmas meal is just days away, but don’t you feel like switching things up a bit this year?

Sure, we love our traditional turkey and trimmings, but it can all feel a bit same same. Which is a shame, given the amazing food culture we have in the UK.

Luckily, our friends over at Tasty have been set on changing all that with their festive video series, A Very Tasty Christmas. Throughout the month of December, they’ve been spotlighting different cultures around the UK who celebrate Christmas – sharing recipes for the delicious dishes they eat.

As a treat, we got to sample every one of these delicious dishes a few weeks ago at the joint Buzzfeed / HuffPost Christmas gathering, so we can vouch for just how mouthwateringly tasty they really are.

Take your pick from the recipes below or why not try them all over the festive break? We promise they’ll add flavour and fun to your table on December 25.

Kosovan Brussels Sprouts 🇽🇰

Are you still a sprout doubter? You won’t be once you’ve tried these bad boys. The magic to this recipe from Lirim Gula, aka @gulasgrub, is Sujuk, a dry, spicy and fermented Balkan sausage that takes this festive veg from no to “WOH!”

Cantonese Hoisin Spatchcock Chicken 🇭🇰

If you’d like something different to turkey, give this juicy chicken recipe from Romany Henry, aka @dudu_eats. a go. Spatchcocking ensures the crispiest skin, while the honey glaze and (hidden) garlic cloves add flavour.

Filipino Leche Flan 🇵🇭

Who said Christmas pud has to be stodgy? Make this lighter-than-light Filipino flan from @godfrey_mercado instead (and appreciate his jumper while you do!). The secret is in not overstirring – and getting the final flip after cooking just right.

Ghanian Jollof Rice with Festive Suya Skewers 🇬🇭

Representing Ghana, plant-based chef Rachel, aka @tastycurls, delivers the ultimate Jollof Rice recipe – with 100% vegan skewers on the side. This dish has spice, thanks to the Scotch Bonnet in the sauce – and we love her for it.

Haitian Macaroni Au Gratin 🇭🇹

Carinne Julien, aka @carcarj brings sunny Haiti to these chilly climes, with a classy spin on Mac & Cheese. The key? Cheese and more cheese. Watch the vid to see she adds cheddar and parmesan, not once but three times. Yum!

British Toad In The Hole 🇬🇧

It’s not Christmas without pigs in blankets so praise be to creator Emma, aka @thesugafix_, for giving this British classic a key festive update. Serve this one up on Christmas day and you’ll be getting a round of applause from all.

Italian Wine Cookies 🇮🇹

These tasty Christmas cookies aren’t just for dunking in wine, you actually pour it in the cookie dough, too! You’ll also be using olive oil instead of butter. Could things get more Italian? Wonderful Lucia Fioravanti, aka @luu_cy, explains all.

Middle Eastern Christmas Turkey 🇸🇾

And finally, the turkey on top! Homam Ayaso (@homamino) adds his own special twist on this Christmas centrepiece, smothering it in delicious butter made aromatic with herbs, spices, citrus and a little festive magic for a turkey, in Homan’s words “like no other”. A very merry Christmas from him – and us!

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My Children Are Autistic, Here’s How We Make Christmas Wonderfully Unique

The festive period can be overwhelming for lots of people, but for autistic children it can be a particularly fraught time of year.

The disruption to their routine, sensory overload, and overwhelming influx of new information can be stressful and sometimes even distressing, says Michelle Myers, who works for Great Minds Together, a charity supporting young people with special educational needs and disabilities (SEND).

Myers – who is an autistic woman and mum to autistic children – suggests all of this can add up to trigger episodes of increased levels of anxiety, fluctuation of needs and different behaviours as children process these changes.

“It can be a really difficult time,” she tells HuffPost UK, “but there are steps that parents can take to better support them and reduce the overall stress of the festive period.”

Here are her tips for navigating the festive period if your child is autistic or has additional needs.

Don’t be afraid to create new traditions

“Be unapologetically you and do what brings your family peace and joy this Christmas,” says Myers.

Whether it’s leaving presents unwrapped under the tree because your child has a sensory sensitivity to wrapping paper, or you let them eat their favourite pizza instead of Christmas dinner, her main piece of advice is to “do what works for you”.

“Create new traditions,” she suggests. “Neurodiverse families are wonderfully unique so it makes sense that our Christmas should be just as wonderfully unique as we are.”

Do plan ahead

Sticking to daily routines can be so important for autistic children (and adults!), so Myers advises keeping as many routines in place as possible over the festive period – and that includes Christmas Day.

“Some routines for autistic people are as essential to us as breathing,” she says, “so to have too many changes can really impact us.”

When things do have to change, it’s important to plan as far in advance so you can give your child as much warning as possible – “and don’t change too many things at once,” she adds.

Don’t say ‘yes’ to events you know will be stressful

It’s so important to advocate for the needs of your child – and that means saying no to events that you know will be stressful.

“Tell Aunty Irene that hugs are a no-go. Ask school for a timetable of events. You owe no explanations to anyone,” says Myers.

She says autistic people deserve to have their “often-hidden needs accepted and respected”, otherwise they can fall into the trap of feeling the pressure to conform, which can lead to masking, she adds, “which is never a good thing for anyone”.

Masking is where a person hides or disguises parts of their selves in order to fit in. According to the National Autistic Society, it might involve suppressing certain behaviours autistic people find soothing, or mimicking the behaviour of other people in order to get by in social situations.

Do use visual supports

Visual supports such as lists, calendars, text messages or even photos can help autistic people prepare for new experiences, suggests Myers. So don’t be afraid to roadmap what Christmas – and the following days – will entail.

“It helps us to process time, sequence activities and even reduces our anxiety,” she says.

Any kind of visual support you can provide will act as a sat nav to their day. This helps them see the steps they need to take, prevents them from getting lost, and maps out the time it will take (so they can see it will end eventually).

All of this can contribute to preventing them from getting overwhelmed.

Do remember to schedule time for them to recharge

“Imagine we all have a battery inside us. Some things we do drain our battery, and some things we do charge our battery. December brings with it lots of things that can quickly deplete autistic children’s batteries,” says Myers.

Whether it’s the carols, the flashing lights, the social interaction with family members you haven’t seen since this time last year.

“We need to remember that their little batteries may need more opportunities to charge at this time,” says Myers. So do schedule time for your family to rest amid the mayhem of the festive period – even on Christmas Day.

“Take a sensory bag, ear defenders, a dark den, their favourite snack or blanket, whatever works for them,” she adds.

Don’t be too hard on yourself

One thing it’s important for parents to remember is that it’s ok if things don’t turn out perfectly at Christmas. You’re doing the best you can.

Myers recalls how one year her Christmas tree collapsed and thousands of pine needles fell off it. “I was devastated,” she recalls. “I cried so much I convinced myself that Christmas was over.

“But then my son came bounding down the stairs and proceeded to swish through the dry dead pine needles like fallen autumn leaves – my tears turned to hysterical laughter streaming down my face.

“All was not lost, right there in that moment we found joy and laughter. We shared such a moment together in the chaos of my fallen tree that I realised that for us, Christmas was always going to look a bit different to everyone else’s – and that was OK.

“In fact, it was more than ok, it was amazing.”

For more information on supporting children with SEND including informative blogs and podcasts visit www.greatmindstogether.co.uk.

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Christmas Pay Dates Are Screwing Us More Than Usual This Year

With both Christmas and New Year’s Day falling on a Sunday this year, the following Monday and Tuesday become bank holidays – which means the day you get paid will be moving.

The majority of companies opt to move their December pay date forward in this situation, which can feel like a real festive treat for employees at the time.

But come January, when you’ve potentially had 40 days or more between pay cheques, the disruption to your usual budget can really hit hard.

Every year when this happens, you’ll see tweets on social media with people joking about January pay day feeling a million years away.

But with the cost of living so high this year and people’s finances already at breaking point, for many households this will be no laughing matter.

All this means that preparing for the inevitable Christmas pay gap is even more essential than usual.

If you’ve already been paid this month, try to avoid using those early funds to pay for last-minute Christmas gifts and extras that aren’t essential.

To help with budgeting, Mat Megens, CEO of money-saving app HyperJar, recommends dividing your December salary into five as soon as it hits your account.

“If you’re used to a monthly salary lasting four weeks you can come unstuck when you’re paid earlier than usual in December,” he tells HuffPost UK.

“So make sure you divide what you have by five (depending when you’re paid) – not four – to get you through to that next pay cheque at the end of January.”

If you receive Universal Credit alongside your salary, a shift in pay date can also change the benefits you receive – something to factor into any budgeting.

Anna Stevenson, senior benefits specialist at the charity Turn2us, explains: “Unfortunately, if you’re on Universal Credit, this can cause problems, because it might look to Universal Credit that you got twice as much pay in the month as you actually did.

“Your employer is supposed to report pay on the usual pay date, even when they pay early but it might be a good idea to remind them of this and point them to the HMRC guidance.”

If you think your Universal Credit payment has been cut in January, Stevenson advises contacting the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP) to explain what has happened.

“If it has been cut, be sure to ask for an RTI (real time information) dispute,” she says.

“This means that the DWP can investigate and re-assign your missing payment to your next month’s payment. It is worth noting this can take over a month to rectify, so it is best to talk to your employer before you are paid to prevent this happening.”

Others have shared their own tips on social media, such as setting some money aside and ‘paying yourself’ on your usual pay date.

Megens provides us with these further tips for staying on top of your budget when your pay date has moved:

Swap brands for supermarket own-label
Food is one of our biggest monthly expenses. You can save around £40 in January by swapping big brands for supermarket own-label equivalents.

Forget regifting… resell instead
If you don’t have gift receipts, head to auction sites like eBay, or try Depop and Vinted for clothes and accessories, to get some cash back in your pocket in January.

Have a strategy for the sales
Set yourself a limit if you’re spending in the Boxing Day and New Year sales and don’t get carried away. Only buy what you’ve planned for, and double check the price now so you’re sure you’re getting a genuine bargain.

Take control: plan for pressure points
Use any downtime between Christmas and New Year to take your first budgeting steps into 2023. Plan for the year’s financial pinch points – those big expenses that come up every year, like house insurance, holidays and Christmas. Note when they’re due and how much you need to start putting aside to pay for them and avoid getting into debt.

And if you’re doing all that and you’re still worried about money, Stevenson says it’s worth checking whether you’re eligible for state support.

“Millions of people miss out on thousands of pounds each year because they’re not sure what they’re entitled to,” she says – urging people use the free Turn2us Benefits Calculator to find out what extra help may be available to you and your family at this time.

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This Is Why Some Kids Are Terrified Of Santa – And What To Do About It

If you’ve taken your child to see Santa recently, chances are they’ll have reacted one of three ways: they’ll have been shy and a bit unsure, they’ll have been super excited and loved the experience, or they’ll have become really upset.

“If you’ve ever been to a Santa’s grotto it is very common to see kids responding fearfully when it’s their turn to see Santa,” says counsellor Chris Boobier. “The photos are not as parents expected, with many children in tears.”

Sometimes this fear of Saint Nick can spiral into something more. Year-on-year data reveals that Google searches for ‘Santaphobia’ have increased by 56% since last December, according to analysis by Crafted Beds, while searches for ‘fear of Santa’ have risen by 31%.

Why is Santa so scary?

If you think about it, it makes total sense that children would be wary of this strange man dressed in a bright red outfit with fake facial hair. Especially if they’ve been warned against interacting with strangers.

Then you’ve got all the additional storylines that surround Santa. The fact he watches over kids and knows if they’ve been naughty or nice, that he can squeeze down the chimney and drop presents into their bedrooms when they’re asleep.

“It completely goes against everything that is regularly taught about safety, causing conflicted feelings,” says Boobier.

On top of that, come December – heck, November – Santa is everywhere. “Now that you can write to Santa, get Santa to call you, go and see Santa, track him through the air, there is a lot ‘more’ of Santa than ever before and it can be overwhelming,” says the therapist.

“He changes size and shape, has different voices and it doesn’t quite add up: kids are smart and know something is afoot, but also believe what they are told.”

Then you’ve got the over-stimulating environment in which you usually find Santa – the bright lights, loud sounds and crowds of people at his grotto.

Combine that with a couple of years of not socialising much (thanks Covid) and it’s really no wonder more kids aren’t shaking in their boots on coming face-to-face with Mr Claus himself.

“We are in a post Covid world where children under four have not been socialised as much as before because of lockdowns,” says Counselling Directory member Claire Elmes. “This is feeding into many social difficulties, including visiting Santa.”

How to tell your child has a phobia of Santa

The point at which being scared of Santa turns into a full-blown phobia is usually after a negative experience has occurred and the child has linked this to Santa in some way. You might find, as a parent, that anything related to Santa or Christmas then triggers your child, causing a physical and emotional reaction.

You might even notice they start to react negatively to anyone wearing similar red coats, says hypnotherapist Penny Ling: “Our brain’s pattern match for danger. A person with a phobia of spiders will jump at a tomato stalk, so it stands to reason a child phobic about Santa will respond with fear around red coats and long white beards.”

Symptoms of Santaphobia could include your child feeling more anxious than usual, not wanting to go to bed on their own or having difficulty sleeping, says Boobier.

“They may want to avoid anything too ‘Christmassy’ like grottos or certain movies, and not talk about Santa. They may request stockings are not put in their room,” he adds.

Some children, on being faced with Santa, might become agitated and want to leave, adds Ling, who is a member of Hypnotherapy Directory. They might start crying or wet themselves if they are not taken out of the situation early enough.

If you’ve got this far, you’ve probably established that your child has a phobia of Santa – or at the very least, is uncomfortable by his presence. So what can you do about it?

Dos and don’ts for tackling Santaphobia

Do prepare your child for their trip to see Santa

Preparation is key ahead of a trip to see Father Christmas, says Claire Elmes. She recommends discussing what is likely to happen at the grotto and showing your child pictures of Santa ahead of it so they know and are prepared for what to expect.

“Explain that some children find him a bit scary and that’s ok, you will be with them and it is all safe,” she says. Sometimes it can be helpful to go with another child who is OK with Santa.

Don’t force them to sit on Santa’s lap

If you do get to the grotto and they become upset, don’t force them to sit on Saint Nick’s lap or have pictures taken, it’s not going to be enjoyable for the child or help their fear.

“Acknowledge their feelings,” suggests Elmes, “and accept they may not be ready. Gently encourage them to be a safe distance and observe others if possible.”

Boobier adds that parents might want to find other photo opportunities where their child can be themselves and be happy.

Don’t shame your child for being scared

Sometimes as parents it can be hard to put ourselves in our kids’ shoes and you might even tell your child to “stop being silly” because it’s “just Santa”. But Ling suggests this is unhelpful.

“Try to be encouraging, showing that other children are enjoying the experience and it’s just new for them,” she says.

Don’t make up stories about Santa to scare your child into behaving

Chris Boobier is also keen to convey that children begin to have awareness for make believe and reality between the ages of three and five, so anything up to the age of five could be completely real to them.

“The idea they are being watched and don’t want to be on the naughty list will feel very real,” he says. “Knowing to what depth our children believe this Christmas magic can help with pulling back on some on the ever-growing Christmas traditions we create (Elf on the Shelf, anyone?) and reduce the ongoing hype that Christmas has become.”

Elmes agrees: “As tempting as it is try not to use Santa as a bribe for being good (we’ve all been there!) telling children he is always watching can also be a bit scary.”

Do talk about their fears

Let your child tell you they are afraid of Santa and really listen to how they feel, allowing them time and space to explain why, suggest therapists.

“Whilst this can feel a bit sad for parents as they go to all the effort to make Christmas magical, listening and understanding how your child feels without dismissing their feelings is the key to helping your child cope at Christmas time,” Boobier adds.

“They may tell you what would feel better for them and some traditions could be altered as they grow up.”

Remember it probably won’t last forever

However you feel about your child’s response to Santa, Chris Boobier encourages parents to keep perspective: “Most children grow out of a fear for Santa past the age of five, depending on development progress, when they can confidently distinguish the difference between fantasy and reality – and they will become excited again about Santa Claus.”

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New Christmas Songs For 2022: Our Verdict

Pop fans – the time has come to start updating your Christmas playlists.

This year, we’ve really been spoilt, with some of the biggest names in music unveiling brand new festive offerings, including seasonal tunes from the likes of Lizzo, Sam Smith and Alicia Keys.

Fortunately for those who don’t feel like sifting through every single new song to sort out the “naughty” from the “nice”, we’ve done all the hard work for you.

Here’s our take on some of the biggest new Christmas releases for this year, starting with something very special indeed…

Lindsay Lohan – Jingle Bell Rock, feat. Ali Tomineek

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Oh, Santa has been good to us this year. Not only is 2022 the year we finally got a Lindsay Lohan comeback in the wonderfully cheesy Netflix original Falling For Christmas, it also came with a bonus stocking filler in the form of a new musical offering from the criminally-underrated artiste.

What’s more, the track is a cover of the festive staple Jingle Bell Rock, in a nod to one of the most iconic scenes of Lindsay’s signature film, Mean Girls.

All in all, we’re very much here for her take on Jingle Bell Rock, and we enjoy what the musical team did in terms of bringing the song up to date without taking it too far away from the original. Still, we have had to deduct marks for the completely unnecessary addition of a rap verse (a bit of digging reveals Ali Tomineek originally rose to prominence on the Netflix talent search Rhythm + Flow, which may well explain how he came to be on the track in the first place).

Sample lyric: What a bright time, it’s the right time to rock the night away.

Our rating: 🎄🎄🎄

Alicia Keys – December Back 2 June

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